The Gold Mine
by Bookworm1027
Summary: What if Bella hadn't met the Cullens as a innocent human, but a blood thirsty member of James's coven? A story that's been bothering me for a whle. BPOV and EPOV alternating. R&R please! T fr now, may turn M later.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, so I first of all I own nothing. Seriously, just call me Dodger. Second of all, for those who actually read my other story **_**Lost, Found, and Broken,**_** I will be continuing, I promise. I just need to get a few ideas out of my head and on paper first. Without further ado, **_**The Gold Mine. **_

Chapter 1: The Mute

James, his blonde pony tail swinging to the other side of his head as his attention whirled, was the first to react to the loud, thunderous sound echoing through the wind. The scalp of fire-red hair that I know to belong to Victoria shakes as she sighs loudly. She knows, as well as the rest of us, that we will not be leaving this insignificant town of Forks just yet.

I sigh as well, the sound barely registering for the rest of my coven mates.

We all--perhaps with the exception of our leader, James—are ready to leave this area. Victoria is bored with these surroundings and lack of action that is presented here. She much prefers the loud hustle-and-bustle of cities than small town life.

Laurent is nervous. We have caught the scent of many others of our kind recently near here. Especially near the local high school, where it smells undiluted. Laurent is almost as confrontational as I am, and desperately wants to avoid a fight with this probably much larger group.

I—on the other hand—feel guilty. I grow tired of walking around and seeing the faces of humans grieving for their loved ones. The very same loved ones I have killed. In this way, I truly hate myself. My very existence requires others to die—other innocent humans. James says I shouldn't worry my "pretty little head" about such things because humans are nothing more than live stock.

But I know that's not true. Animals can't feel pain like humans can. Animals can't love as deeply as humans can. And, from all of the immortals I have ever meant, neither can we. Sometimes I wonder if we are closer to being "livestock" than the humans are.

Now, in front of me, James is listening closely to something, his head cocked to the side and ruby eyes distance.

I copy his actions, my ears straining to hear what he finds so fascinating. It is then that I heed the sound of several different voices, all possessing varying tones and pitches.

Victoria and Laurent must hear it too, because the latter replies, his tone wary, "The other coven".

Victoria and James grin simultaneously, excited at the prospect of a challenge.

Laurent exhales loudly but stays quiet. We all know what James will do now.

James takes off first, his mate hot on his heels.

Laurent begins to follow after them, but hesitates as he seeing my still form. He reaches back to my, trying to take my hand. I pull back, as he knew I would do.

Laurent and James both have once expressed…more than friendly feelings for me. And though I know James's feelings are simply there because he wants to affect Victoria or he finds my resisting him a challenges, I also know Laurent's are not. James looks at me as an object, Victoria hates me, so Laurent is the closes thing to friend I have known in a long time.

Sometimes I think that solitude might be better than this life, but I know this also is not true. I need my coven to protect me—the weak, ungifted immortal that I am.

"Isabella," Laurent calls to me quietly, dropping his hand awkwardly. He gives me a polite smile, his accent slipping out slightly. "We should be going."

I nod at him silently. Everything I do now is silent. James says this is a good quality I have and that he prefers it when "a pretty face is unmarred by unattractive nagging". Victoria insults me and often refers to me as the "lonely mute".

Laurent is the only kind one to me.

I race after him, stopping when I am just steps behind them. The forest cracks under our footsteps as we march. We slow down slightly, and I know we must be getting close to where this other coven is. James always likes to make an entrance.

Within a few moments we are greeted by the sight of a large clearing, the gray sky casting a shadow on the otherwise beautiful image. At the other end of the field stand three women and four men.

Hiding my body behind my coven-mates', I take notice of them all.

Besides their alarmingly large number, other things about their behavior confuse me. They are standing next to each other, lined up and facing us is if they are preparing for battle. But instead of holding weapons, they each held a bat or baseball. _That must have been all of the noise._

This strikes me as odd. How did they know we were coming? We were being abnormally quite. It is not likely they heard us. Victoria had been covering our scents so they wouldn't know we were there. How had they known?

From this point I focus on them individually, observing them.

On the farthest left side, and also stepping forward slightly, was the man I would peg as their leader. He was tall, with light blonde hair and a face that radiated civility. He smiled politely at all of us, nodding. His hand was holding the woman's behind him. His mate, I guessed. She was very pretty—as all of our kind were—but there was a gentleness about her curves and face that made me think she was kind and soft-hearted. She had long cameral hair that fell down to her waist.

The pair next to them surprised me. Or at least the male did. His bare arms and neck were completely covered with crescent shaped scars. The sight made me shrink back in fear as Victoria, James, and Laurent all crouched forward, ready for a fight. His hair was also blonde, honey colored highlights shining from the light. He was crouched down in front of a small woman possessively. The woman, who was less than half his tall height, was shaped like a pixie. Her hair was cut short, sticking out in spikes. She was grinning brightly at the girl next to her, bouncing on her the balls of her feet.

The woman next to her was beyond gorgeous. She was much taller than the sprit-like dark haired woman. Her hair was pure golden, falling down on her shoulders like the softest silk. Behind her was a man who was three times larger than either Laurent or James. His grin was large, with child-like dimples playing at the corners of his mouth.

But it was the last man, standing by himself, that truly caught my attention. His beauty could easily rival the blonde woman's. He had a head of bronze hair, the same shade as a new penny. His body was leaner than the other two's, almost a little more boyish like. He had a square jaw and a sharp pointed nose. His mouth was set in a hard, firm line.

But the last thing I observed was their eyes. None of them possessed the normal ruby eyes the rest of us did. Instead they all had slightly different shades of gold. The beautiful bronze hair boy's were shimmering topaz.

There were close to twenty yards separating our two covens.

James nodded slightly at Laurent, silently telling him to take the lead. James sometimes did this when he wanted to appear less important than he was.

Laurent stepped forward, his arms raised in a showing of trust.

The eldest looking blonde man stepped forward, releasing the hand of his mate.

"Hello." The man called out, waving kindly. Both he and Laurent stepped slowly forward, shaking hands when they finally met in the middle. "My name is Carlisle."

"I am Laurent," my friend said civilly. He began the introduction first. "This is my coven." He waved his hand toward us, motioning for us to walk forward. "This is James, Victoria and Isabella." We each nodded as we were introduced.

Carlisle stepped back slightly, waving towards his mate. "This is my family."

I blinked in shock. _Family?_ _Not coven?_

"This is my wife, Esme." He pointed towards his mate…or _wife_. "Alice and her husband Jasper. Rosalie and her husband Emmett, and my son Edward."

_Edward. The beautiful boy's name was Edward. It suits him. _Then something occurred to me. He's…alone? A beautiful person like that didn't have a mate?

"We live in the area," Carlisle went on, smiling at each of us in turn. "Permanently."

_Permanently? How odd these golden eyes were. _

Laurent echoed my thoughts out loud, incredulous.

The woman, Esme, stepped forward, her eyes looking on to mine with an unreadable emotion in them. "You're welcome to come and clean up at our house."

Laurent look back at James, seeking approval, and then nodded to Esme. "Thank You. We would love to accept your offer."

I looked away from Esme and my eyes sub-consciously landed on the beautiful bronze haired boy. His topaz eyes were glaring back at me, their depth holding a deep frustrated anger.

I looked away immediately, feeling embarrassed.

Laurent took my hand, motioning with his head to follow after James and Victoria, who were now being led into the woods by Rosalie, Emmett, and Carlisle. I pulled my hand from his grasp, looking away from him shamed. Laurent sighed, following after our coven-mates with fast strides.

Abruptly, I felt a dainty hand on my shoulder and jerked away in surprise.

The fairy-sized woman—Alice—and her mate stood there, each smiling at me kindly.

"Hello Bella," Alice said to me her smile turning into a full out grin.

I frowned in confusion. What did she just call me? "Isabella." I corrected, the sound of my own voice a little shocking from lack of use.

Alice laughed—it was a high, trilling laugh. "No. You're much more of a Bella. You just don't know it yet." She winked at me before grabbing her…_husband's_ hand, giggling as they ran through the forest.

"She's right, you know?"

The voice shocked me. It was sounded like honey would sound, dripping through the smoothest silk an caressing the softest velvet. I turned around quickly, finding myself facing…_Edward._

He smile at my shocked expression, his grin crooked. It left me breathless. Could he be any more beautiful?

It took me a full moment—which, as it happens, is quite a bit of time for an immortal—to realize I hadn't yet answered his question yet.

"About what?" I asked him hesitantly, not sure if James would be angry at me for speaking aloud. When I saw that Edward and I were the only one's left in the forest, I grew less tense and he answered.

"You look much more 'Bella' than 'Isabella'." He smiled at me again. "Bella means beautiful in Italian. Very appropriate."

I felt that if I could blush, I would have. I looked away from him.

"Are you doing that on purpose?" he asked abruptly, his words marked with a slight hint of frustration.

"I'm sorry?" I relied quietly, unsure of what he was talking about, yet not wanting to offend him.

"Blocking me." He said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Is it accidental?"

"I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about," I admitted softly, keeping my gaze from lingering on him for too long.

Edward opened his mouth to say something again, but he was interrupted.

"Isabella!" I heard James's voice call over the meadow to me. It surprised me how crass his voice sounded now that I'd heard Edward's. I swallowed nervously, the venom burning in my throat. James didn't like to be kept waiting.

I turned to look a Edward again, his beauty straining against my eyes before I looked away. Nervously, the movement feeling oddly foreign, I lifted the corner of my lips to smile at him before I followed after my leader.


	2. Chapter 2

**Holy Crap! Okay, it's just that my inbox is completely full of alerts and reviews and that's just….wow! Holy Crap! I'll work on making my reaction sound a little more articulate in the future. Thanks! **

**Also, I would really appreciate any kind of suggestions you want to throw out there for consideration. I have a game plan for this story as of now, but I am nothing if not flexible. **

**And that came out a lot less dirty in my head. **

Chapter 2: The Lonely

Edward:

Emmett slams the bat against the ball as hard he could, the cracking sound almost too loud to be confused with thunder. Carlisle takes off after ball as Emmett begins a slow, arrogant strut around the bases. He and Jasper high five near third. Emmett barely makes it around before a disappointed Carlisle appears out of the forest.

I roll my eyes and sigh. Sometimes I feel truly concerned that Emmett's mind might have been marred during his transformation. It would certainly explain a few things.

_Eddie!_ He called to me in his mind, hurling the bat my direction simultaneously. _Batter up! _

I roll my eyes at the intentions behind Emmett's thoughts. He is challenging me, determined to prove that he is stronger than me. Normally I do not participate in Emmett's more immature contests, but I humor him today. He has, after all, been abnormally annoying with his fantasies of Rosalie as of late.

Alice winks playfully at me as I step up to the plate, already giggling mentally. She eggs me on, wanting to see the hilarity of Emmett's temper tantrum first hand.

I lean in gracefully, propping my elbow up to ready myself. Alice, never one to play easy, throws a fast ball, her wind up creating a staggering force behind the toss.

I connect the aluminum bat the ball with even more force behind it then Emmett had, watching in satisfaction as the baseball splits apart in mid-air, the pieces scattering on the soft grass.

The entire family laughs at Emmett's good-natured swearing, only Rosalie offering to comfort him like the small child he is acting. Jasper hurries to Alice's side picking her up and kissing her endearingly on the forehead. From the corner of my eye, I see Esme gently brush a strand of hair from Carlisle's face.

It is times like this that I feel truly alone—when my family, completely subconsciously, couples off. I know they don't mean to alienate me, make me feel like I don't belong.

But they do.

I know, logically an rationally, that they all love me in some way. There thoughts tell me as much. Carlisle sees me as a protégé, friend and son. Esme now—and always has—considers me as her eldest son whom she adores. I am Alice's best friend, Emmett's favorite brother, Jasper's most avid debater, and Rosalie's…well, she loves me in some context.

But, even as I fill these rolls, I am not complete. I am missing a half of myself, a half of what I could be. I have often tried to imagine Jasper without Alice or Emmett lacking Rosalie.

The image my mind conjures is heart wrenching and depressing.

A near perfect example of how I—the solitary figure—feel surrounded by three blissfully happy couples.

But I purposefully don't tell my family how I feel, because it would only hurt them needlessly. There is no solution to my problem; no potion to cure my loneliness. So, though my family may know the general way I feel mate-less, only one of them truly knows how devastated my soulless heart is.

Jasper, Alice still tucked securely in his arms, turns his head towards me and frowns, his mind swirling from the intensity of my emotions. I smirk at him playfully, trying to diffuse the situation. I don't want any attentions for my loneliness.

Suddenly, slipping out from her husband's arms, Alice gasps loudly, her mind pulling me into a vision, the familiar swooping sensation hitting my stomach painfully.

_Four figures emerge from the foggy forest, their graceful strides purposeful. _

_The insects flee as they approach, the animals running in self preservation. One man, the blonde, seems to be leading them. _

Alice pulls out of her vision, her head in dazed stupor. Once I am also free from the images inside my sister's head, I immediately begin to search outwards in my mind, trying to locate the other coven's thoughts.

We have known for a few days now that there was a possibility of meeting the nomads. Although their scents have been carefully masked, no one can completely hide from Alice's visions.

I pick up on the thoughts immediately, listening carefully for any threatening edges.

_...about time James found something in this tiny-ass town. I've been itching for a little excitement…_

_ …makes me nervous. We should be heading out. And this other coven, there are so many of them, even with James, I would be worried in a fight…_

_ …seven of them. One smell, I recognize it. So sweet…so familiar. Long ago, where do I remember it from?…_

I concentrated closer, sure that I was missing the thoughts of one individual. I was positive that Alice had seen _four_ vampires in the coven, not three. Whose thoughts were I missing?

"How long?" Carlisle asked me, his hand clamping roughly down on my shoulder.

I considered again for a moment, still pushing for the forth immortals thoughts. When none appeared, I sighed, frustrated. "Five minutes," I informed my father hesitantly.

Jasper, always using strategy as his first companion, mentally decides it would be best for us to stand side-by-side and appear as a defensive front. And, though I don't detect any threatening advances from our visitors, I agree with him. We all line up, each of my family members standing beside their mate protectively. And I, of course, stand alone. Alone in a filled clearing.

They appear a few moments later, their walks feral and primitive. I take in each of their appearances and thoughts, acting as the safety detector in my family.

The one who is their leader, the blonde male, is on the farthest left, one of his arms slung across his mate's shoulder. He looks around the red haired woman to send a silent message to his coven-mate—Laurent—and directs him to take the lead. James wants to seem inconsequential. He wants to blend in.

His mate, Victoria, is perhaps the most dangerous. She has a thirst for violence and excitement. Her mind is craving the adrenaline of the hunt and readiness to serve her mate. She is, undoubtedly, more loyal to James than he is to her.

Laurent is extremely anxious. He does not enjoy a fight like his two other Coven mates, and the size of my family makes his even more nervous. That, and the odd appearance of Jasper's battle wounds makes him think of fleeing in self-preservation. Only his fear of James keeps his feet moving towards us.

The last one—a woman—is hidden from my view. She crouches lowly behind James and Victoria, though they think nothing of her. I can see only the chestnut hair that flies around in the wind.

I open my mind as wind I can, wincing as everyone's thought crowd me at once.

But none of the new girl's. I push again, purposely towards her, and hit nothing but silence.

I blink, stunned.

I…I can't _hear_ her.

I take a minute to adjust to the realization, still completely shocked that she is blocking my ability.

Carlisle calls to me in his mind, silently asking if it is safe to go meet Laurent in the middle of the field. I nod tersely in reply.  
My father meets the dark Frenchman in the center of the field and they shake hands pleasantly. "Hello!" I hear my father call out. I turn my attention away from the mental mute and focus on Laurent. "My name is Carlisle."

_He's so…civil. _The re eyed man thinks of my father. _And their eyes? Why are they like that? Does it make them dangerous. I hope I do not offend these strange ones. _"My name is Laurent," he introduces himself. "This is my coven. James," the blonde nods, "Victoria," another nod, "And Isabella." I see the head of chestnut hair bob slightly.

This is irritating me. If I can not read her mind, should I at least be allowed to see her facial expressions? This girl, unknowingly, has severally irked me.

"This is my family," Carlisle says politely, waving towards Esme. "My Wife Esme. Alice and her husband Jasper. Rosalie and her husband Emmett, and my son Edward." I almost laugh there, as he finishes. I am often tacked on at the end, not paired with anyone. I am alone, even in simply pleasantries.

"We live in the area," Carlisle continues. "Permanently."

All of their thoughts—save one, of course—are shocked. "Permanently?" Laurent repeated, stunned.

Esme, always the proper hostess, smiles warmly and invites them to freshen up at our house.

Laurent, after checking with his leader, accepts the offer. And then—finally!—I get a full view of Isabella.

She has a thin, yet toned, boy. Her skin is—of course—just as pale as mine and also as impenetrable.

Her mahogany hair surprises me with a light red hue. It falls down, framing her delicate heart shaped face. She has a wide forehead and slender nose, soft looking lips and large doe-shaped scarlet eyes.

I have seen many beautiful female vampires before—the Denali sisters were more than enough proof of that—and yet hers seemed…different to me. Her beauty—_Isabella's_ beauty—is a timeless one. It reminds me of a renaissance painting depicting an ancient goddess.

But, more than that, it is an innocent, sincere beauty that make my eyes go wide and my breath stop short. I try, once again, to push past her mental wall only to be frustrated. Then suddenly, Isabella's ruby eyes art up to mine, locking them in her gaze before she looks down again.

She's shy. I feel relieved that I know this about her know, yet the knowledge only fuels t the desire to know _more._

Without properly thinking about it, I follow after Alice and Jasper to greet Isabella.

"Hello Bella," Alice says, trying desperately not to run up and hug the shy girl. Jasper is sending her waves of calm the size of tycoons. Alice grinned brightly. _We're gonna be best friends!_ She mentally squealed. I blinked. Had she had a vision I missed? How was _that_ even possible?

The girl frowned. "Isabella." She corrected, though her voice was much too kind. It sounded like a light bell, ringing out through the meadow with an omniscient quietness. It was lovely.

Alice laughed. "No," she disagreed. "You're much more of a Bella," _or at least you will be. _"You just don't know it yet." She winked spiritedly before skipping off, dragging my brother happily behind her.

Isabella—or Bella, as I was growing fond of that nickname—didn't look at me, so I decided I would have to begin the conversation. I suddenly felt very nervous. There was an irrational wish that this girl like me. And that simply didn't make any sense. I was only going to see this girl for a day, at maximum. Why did I care what she thought?

But I did care. _So_ much.

I cleared my throat in a mundane human gesture before saying "She's right, you know."

Bella's head whirled around, here eyes wide in surprise. She must not have realized he was there. She stood silent for a minute or two before asking, perhaps a little too hesitantly, "About what?"

I smiled widely at her. I couldn't help it, honestly. "You look much more 'Bella' than 'Isabella'. I told her honestly. "Bella means beautiful in Italian. Very appropriate."

Bella looked away from me, embarrassed. Why was she embarrassed? She must know she was beautiful. Rosalie certainly knew she was. Didn't all beautiful girls? What was she thinking?

"Are you doing that on purpose?" I demanded, needing to know if she was aware of her irritable shielding.

"I'm sorry?" she said, phrasing the apology as a question and showing me that she most likely didn't have any idea.

"Blocking me." I explained. "Is it accidental?"

She blinked a few times, otherwise staying perfectly still. She looked shyly away from me. "I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about." She said softly.

I began to explain about my "gift" an her apparent shield, but a harsh voice called us before I could star.

James calls Bella to follow him, his thought towards me unkind. She smiles after me before leaving, and the sight leaves me paralyzed for a few moments.

What is she thinking?


	3. Chapter 3

**To Rika,**

**Yes, as a matter of fact I do. Right now I am writing **_**LOST FOUND AND BROKEN**_**, but honestly, it's not quite what I had imagined. In other words, it kind of sucks. I'll be taking it down soon. I'll also be posting some other AU and AH later. As for recommendations, look at my favorite stories on my profile. Please pay special attention to **_**METAMORPHSIS.**_** It is absolutely amazing. One of the best and sadly underrated. Thank you so much for the review! **

**--Bookworm **

**To Saga Obsessed, **

**Yes, I too have always been curious as to what their conversation would have been like. I hope I live up to your expectations. And thank you for the faithfulness. I appreciate it more than you know. **

**--Bookworm**

**To my other readers—if you are reading this—thank you for the awesome support. Once again, I own nothing. **

Chapter 3:

Bella

The Cullens continue to strike me as a strange breed of immortals. Aside from their odd golden eyes and even stranger forth knowledge, their _behavior _still confuses me greatly.

I have never seen a coven act so…lightly around each other before. So carefree. The large man—Emmett—is constantly grinning and laughing. Alice's mate Jasper seems to soak up all of his radiant energy and give it back out. Being near him almost makes me want to smile and laugh.

It has been so long since I've laughed.

I remember distantly from my human memories—now each seems to be covered with a thin layer of dusty glass in my mind—that I used to love to laugh. I vaguely remember the sensation of air swooping in through my chest and the light; joyfully sound pouring from my mouth.

What surprises me as well, about this strange…_family_, is their house. They live in a _house_. Not a stolen hotel room they may use to freshen up or an apartment building rented for the month. But a real, honest-to-god _house. _

And, even more shocking, it was a beautiful house at least three stories high. They said they had bedrooms—for which I am lacking to think of a purpose—and a dinning room, a kitchen, and….all of the rooms a normal home would have!

It all just feels so delightfully human!

Somewhere, deep down inside, envy creeps up into my thoughts. By, without any hesitation, I push it back down. It was not the Cullens fault that they had better life than I did. I could not fault them for being less savage than I was.

I looked carefully towards my coven mates as we settled on one of the large couches, watching for their reactions towards the Cullens. Victoria and James seem have the same opinion—as is often. They do not like the Cullens or their unusual ways.

Laurent still appears to be apprehensive of the kind family—that term still sounds odd to think—being cautious not to say something offensive. He did not, however, seem to initially dislike them. That thought made me smile slightly.

Throughout the discussion, Laurent kept putting his arm around my shoulder, pressing my body uncomfortably close to him. Normally I would have gently removed his arm, but I didn't want to create a scene in front of the Cullens.

Edward sat directly in front of us, his gazes shifted from me to Laurent's arm and then back again. He looked oddly bothered by something I couldn't place. I didn't like him being bothered. It…it _upset _me. I could fathom why, but I was positive it did. When Edward's golden orbs caught my scarlet, I hesitated and then gave him a kind smile, hoping to ease his troubles…whatever they were.

Edward grinned lopsidedly back at me, and I lowered my eyelashes, embarrassed by his intense gaze. His stare made me feel like ice was traveling down through my limbs, only to be replaced by the hottest burning lava.

I sat quietly as Carlisle and Laurent chattered idly of their human lives. They seemed to bond well, both being changed within the same time period. It was only about an hour in to the conversation that Victoria finally approached the topic the rest of us were tempted to.

"Your eye color," she said bluntly, "What is the cause?"

All of the Cullens laughed together, as though they were discussing an inside joke. I could distinctly pick out Edward's velvety chuckle. The sound made me melt.

"Our diet," Esme said at last. "We eat a bit…differently than most of our kind." She smiled warmly at me.

_Differently? Differently how? _

"What do you mean?" James asked, somewhat rudely. I bit back a growl. There was no need to be so hostile.

I saw Carlisle shift in his seat nervously, looking at Edward as though he expected him to say something. Jasper and Emmett both took on slightly defensive postures, each standing in front of their mate. Edward, I noticed, was the only Cullen who didn't outwardly react to James's question.

The beautiful bronze hair Adonis simply shrugged, showing nothing more than cool nonchalance and relied "We don't hunt humans."

The entire world seemed to stop moving, freezing me where I stood.

I gasped loudly; my heart filling with so much hope that I feared it might explode.

They didn't hunt humans. There was another option. I didn't have to kill people; to hurt innocents.

I couldn't seem to comprehend what Edward was saying; to fully understand what the alternative was.

Jasper's head whirled around to look until he was facing me, the expression he wore almost unreadable. I couldn't seem to focus on him—I was too lost in this realization.

_I didn't have to be a monster any longer._

Somewhere in the far distance, I hear the conversation continue.

"What _do_ you hunt, then?" I heard a disgusted sounding Victoria hiss.

"Animals."

"That can't be very appetizing," James spoke, his voice sounding as though he was gagging on the thought.

Laurent jumped up quickly, seeming to feel the tension in the air, and said hastily "Thank you for your hospitality, Carlisle, but perhaps we should be leaving."

"I agree," I heard James say as he and his mate stood, heading for the door.

All of the Cullens were standing now, some looking saddened, others nervous, and even a few hopeful. All this, of course, was barely registering for me.

_I don't have to hurt people. I don't _have_ to be a monster._

For the first time in nearly two hundred years, I felt a strange fluttering sensation in the pit of my stomach. It lodged itself there as if it would never leave.

Hope. I felt _hope. _

"Isabella?" I heard Laurent's voice call, pulling my out of my self-induced coma slightly. I couldn't prevent a large grin from spreading over my face. _There was hope for me. _I placed a hand over my still heart—if I were human, it would have been racing from the euphoric excitement I felt. "Let's go, Isabella," I heard my friend call out again.

I realized I had yet to move from my spot on the couch.

I'm not sure what made me do it—it certainly wasn't _planned_—but I raced from my seat to look directly in Edward's eyes and clasp his hands in my own. Edward and everyone else looked completely shocked at my actions, but I couldn't seem to take the gin off my face.

_Not a monster_.

"Please," I told the bronze haired god, "Teach me. I don't want to live like this anymore, hunting humans. It's wrong. I have to see their loved ones hurt, because _I've _hurt them." My knees began to shake, as though they might give out without warning. I wished, in that second, that I could cry. I wished for tears of pure joy. I continued to speak, the words bursting out before I could think of them. "You don't know how it's killed me," I told him, trying to show the depth of my sincerity. "I…I am a monster. I hate myself for it, truly. Help me. Teach me?"

My knees did give out then, and I tumbled to the floor, practically groveling at his feet. The joy of the moment was crushing me from the inside; threatening to burst to the surface without warning. My breathing grew heavy, like a human who had just run a long distance.

_No more killing. No more. I've killed enough people…including _her_._

I felt a pair of soft hand touch the side of my arm and I lifted my gaze to face the eldest woman—Esme—pulling me up. As soon as I was standing, she placed her arms around me, crushing my form to her body. For a moment, I was shocked. I couldn't remember ever doing this…_thing. What was it?_

Then a dull human memory emerged and I felt myself smiling again.

A hug. I was being _hugged_.

I slowly placed my arms around Esme, being careful not to use too much pressure. My head dropped onto her shoulder, and breathed in her chocolate scent. I realized that for the first time in this life—possible in _both_ lives—I felt…taken care of.

I felt almost…free.

Esme pulled back after what felt like a long moment, her beautiful golden eyes looking directly into mine. "You," she whispered kindly, "Are welcome to stay as long as you like, Isabella."

Once again, the tears of happiness should have been cascading down my face.

"Thank you, Esme." I whispered back, biting my lip to stop from out right sobbing drily.

Suddenly, like a sharp point breaking the bubble of tranquility we held, a furious growl pierced the air. James was crouched down, teeth bared, with his murderous gaze locked on me.

I quickly flung Esme out of the way, watching as Carlisle took her into his waiting arms.

James stalked forward, a growl boiling from within his throat. I swallowed nervously. I'd scene, first hand, how much pain James was capable of inflicting.

Oh god, I was causing a fight. In the _Cullens_' house.

No, no, no, no!

"Isabella," James hissed out, jerking his head backwards. "We're leaving. _Now."_

Alice's trilling voice shouted then, high enough to possibly shatter all of the nearby glass, "Bella can stay as long as she like."

James turned his head Alice's direction and narrowed his eyes at her, focusing carefully on the sprite sized woman. He chuckled lowly under his breath, the sound coming out as sarcastic and menacing. "You're a spirited one, aren't you?" he teased the small woman.

Jasper immediately placed himself in front of a steaming Alice, standing rigidly.

"No!" I shouted, taking a step towards James. "Please, don't hurt them." The Cullens were good people. They didn't deserve to have my burden placed upon them—it was wrong of me to even ask in the first place. "I'll come with you," I vowed, taking another hesitant step towards my…my _leader_.

I went to walk over to James, but I seemed to hit a stone wall, blocking my entire path from him. Edward stood in front of me, the muscles in his back tense and firm—ready for battle. "I don't think so," I heard him hiss out at James, sinking own and preparing to spring.

_No!_ A voice called out frantically inside my head, so loud it almost hurt, _Not Edward! _

Before I could protest, Edward growled lowly, the threat clear in his actions. "She's not _yours_." He hissed.

James laughed loudly. "She's more mine than anyone else's." He argued haughtily. He faced Carlisle once again, his tone and expression turning business like. I recognized that face.

It was his expression of a determined hunter, when he stops at nothing to win.

_No! NO! Not here! _

"You are declaring war, you realize," James asked Carlisle quietly, "By taking what is mine?"

Carlisle turned to look at me again, watching as I shook my head silently begging. "No." I told him seriously. "Please don't. I'll leave here. I swear." I turned to face the front door, speaking to Laurent. "Don't do this," I pleade with him. "Surely you can see how _right_ the Cullens are, how _pure_—"

Laurent cut of my words, his voice strangely cold. Detached. _Angry._ "I can see you made you choice, Is…" he paused, looking back at me purposely. "_Bella." _

The nickname sounded like dirt on his tongue. I flinched in response.

James smiled in anticipation before standing up straight and marching out of the door quickly. He called, as the door shut behind him, a amused "Be seeing you soon," over his shoulder.

As soon as the door was fully shut, seven pairs of golden eyes turned to look at me, each holding a different emotion behind their glistening color.


	4. Chapter 4

**I would like to formally thank a few of my reviewers here, because they are being more helpful than I would have ever dreamed. So, thank you SagaObsessed for the helpful criticism. Thank you for your advice on the wolves, it is appreciated. And, last but certainly not least, thank you KarinAC2913, for your beautiful words and inspirational faithfulness in my ability. **

**I also would like to mention to readers that I love answering any questions, suggestions or anything of the sort you would like to send. I promise you will be answered! **

**Thank you for your continued support! I, as always, am nothing but a poor ragamuffin without any twilight to her name.**

Chapter 4:

Starting the instant I pounced in front of Bella, the emotions that swirled in me left me breathless. I have, obviously, never had a large emotional rage outside of frustrated, angry, indifferent, and depressed. Jasper would more than willing contest to that. Only once or twice have I expressed emotions out of the norm.

The first time was roughly three years after my rebirth, when Esme joined the Carlisle's and my family. I was upset that she was in love with Carlisle, and frightened that she would, unknowingly, take the only father I had left away from me. I felt like a toddler being denied their favorite toy—possessive. It was only later that I was finally able to understand that I wasn't _loosing_ a father, but rather _gaining_ a mother.

The second was when Rosalie was changed. In that moment, I was not afraid of loss, but scared at the concept of change. I have almost never liked changed, preferring everything stay at one happy constant. When Rose joined my family, I felt like the eldest child who suddenly had a younger, stubborn, and bratty sister thrust upon them who took up all of the attention. The analogy, funnily enough, wasn't all that far off. And again, I felt possessive.

But as soon as I heard James's thoughts of her being _his_, I felt so much more than _possessive _of Bella. I had a horrible, wonderful mixture of emotions settling themselves rapidly in the pit of my stomach. I felt things that I have only experienced before through others.

I felt protective.

Envious.

Enraged.

Guilty.

Helpless.

Hopeless.

And, of course, a little possessive.

But it was a new type of possessive—more powerful than anything I'd felt before. It didn't feel like I was in anger of loosing a favorite toy. Instead it was like all of the blood in the universe was sitting on the edge of one proverbial cliff, about to be destroyed forever. I _needed_ to save Bella, because I_ needed_ what was rightfully _mine_.

I could explain this; couldn't even begin to comprehend what was happing to me.

I looked over at Jasper, silently pleading for his help, but all of his focus was pinned on the form of James retreating out of the door. I could detect the same type of feeling rushing through his thoughts as were mine. He was upset because James threatened his _mate_.

His…_mate._

I felt like there was something I should know, sitting directly in front of me and yet I was unable to grasp it.

As soon as James and his coven had successfully left—not even their thoughts close enough to hear any longer—everyone turned to look at a horrified Bella.

He beautiful lips were parted, her jaw hanging slack. She looked she would be crying if it were possible. She crossed her arms over her chest, holding her shaking frame together. Other than the trembling, Bella stood completely still.

Then, so quietly I almost missed it, Bella whispered "I'm so sorry." Carlisle, Esme, Alice and I all began to object; to tell her that it wasn't her fault, that she was just doing the right thing. But the correction, surprisingly, came from an entirely unsuspected source.

"You shouldn't be sorry," Rosalie mutter angrily, flipping her hair over her shoulder. Emmett mentally noted that she often did this when she was uncomfortable.

_Uncomfortable? Since when is Rosalie anything but confident, in front of strangers, at least?_

Bella mumbled, appearing as though she had not even heard my sister speak. Her ruby gaze was flickering between staring at the faces of my family and looking down, ashamed, at the floor. "Unleashed James on you. I can't believe I did that. Acting foolish."

Rosalie, I saw, was growing irate with Bella. She rolled her eyes once, finally stared up and walked towards the red eyed angle without one thought of hesitation. _There was my sister._ She stepped around me—for I had yet to move form Bella's side. The very thought made panic swell up inside me, threatening to turn my sight into a red haze of franticness.

Beside me, Rosalie took Bella's chin in her indestructible hand and lifted it up until they were looking eye to eye. "Listen." She instructed Bella, who looked almost terrified of my sister, "This is _not_ your fault, understand me? You are doing the right thing by staying here, by not hurting innocent people." Rose's nose scrunched up, as if she was tasted something bad before she continued on, "You are _not_ a hassle for us. We can take James easily, with all our fighting skills—"

"You don't know what he can do!" Bella cried, trying to back out of Rose's strong grip. "He's unstoppable—"

_For all that's holy!_ Rose thought, annoyed, before she interrupted Bella again. "And I don't care. None of us do. Bella," her tone took on a serious edge, as if she were trying to be persuasive. "You should have left him along time ago, Isabella, if James thought you were his property. Men should never have that kind of power over you, understand? _Never_." _And besides,_ my sister finished in her thoughts, _it looks as if your part f the family now. Esme and Alice have certainly taken a liking to you. And think of what you could mean to E—_

Her thoughts cut off sharply, immediately changing into a repetition of Brittney Spears lyrics. She took a glanced at me and I narrowed my eyes, suspicious. What didn't she want me to hear?

Finally, Rosalie released a shocked Bella's chin, shrugging causally and walking outside, heading to the garage. The song lyrics were continuing to play, and she knew she would be thoroughly distracted by the engine of a car. Emmett smiled warmly at Bella, his thoughts concerned, before he darted off after his mate.

The rest of us stood here for a few seconds, each engulfed in the awkward silence. I tried desperately to find something to say to this beautiful girl, wanting simply to _talk _to her. Before I could open my mouth, however, Esme did the job for me.

"Isabella," she asked politely, then frowned. "Or is it Bella?"

Bella shrugged, confused. "Whichever you prefer."

Esme smiled again. She already thought of Bella as a new child, only having known her a little than an hour. _Such a sweet, innocent girl. And so pretty!_ My mother thought happily, stepping closer to Bella. "Please, come sit down so we can get to know you."

"And answer any questions you may have, of course," my father interjected, his usual soothing manner echoing through his words.

Bella looked over at me, and I smiled back, purely on instinct.

I was so confused. Since when was _smiling _an instinct of mine? Since when did I have feelings like this? Since when didn't I have control over my actions and—more importantly—my _re_actions!

What was this girl _doing_ to me?!

Esme led Bella back over to the couch, sitting her beside Alice, and my parents began to chat happily with her.

Before I could follow Jasper put his hand on me shoulder. _Can I talk to you?_ He asked mentally. I looked at Bella, a longing feeling beginning inside of me. I didn't wasn't to part from her.

Nevertheless, I nodded and followed Jasper out of the back door. I felt Bella's eyes on my back until I had completely exited the house. It left me feeling heated and nervous. Excited and anxious all at the same time.

He walked me down, into the forest, far enough that no one would be able to hear us. Finally, he turned, facing me.

"What's going on, Edward?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. One of the crescent shaped scars on his forehead stretched in response. "Why are you feeling this way?"

I threw one of my hands on t a tree near us, leaning against it as though I couldn't support my own weight any longer. "I don't know." I answered him. "Do you have any idea?" Maybe it was part of Bella's gift, to capture the attention of males. Maybe she was using it on me.

Jasper nodded, his voce somber. "I do. But I don't know if you're going to like it." He kept his thoughts carefully blocks.

I clenched my teeth, a snapping sounded booming through the keep woods. Why were _two_ of my siblings blocking me out today?_ What_ could be so damned important to keep from me?

Jasper pointedly ignored my outburst, his amber his topaz gaze flickering to mine. He took a deep breath, trying to prepare himself for whatever he was about to say. I waited, quite impatiently, before he began. "You look at Bella the same why I look at Alice. Feel the same way Emmett feels about Rose. You look at her as a _mate_. You're protective of her."

"I'm protective of Rose and Alice too," I demanded, panicked. _No, I couldn't. I just met her. There no possibility. No…_

Jasper raised an eyebrow, incredulous at my contradiction. "Do you feel possessive of them, too? No. Do you feel lustful? No." His voice dropped, turning harsher. "You feel very strongly about her, Edward. I can feel it."

"I just met her!" I cried, grasping for any straws I had left.

Jasper laughed loudly, throwing his head back. "And how long id you think I talked to Alice before I _knew_." He shook his head. "It was less than a second, and I was hooked for life. If anything, you're moving a bit slow, Edward."

I was out of arguments. Out of _reasons_.

And I found, selfishly of me, that I didn't _care_ either.

This was wrong of me. Bella deserved better. I knew she did. How could I have done this to her?

I felt like Atlas—the entire weight of the world pressing down on my shoulders, yet I was unable to hold it up properly. It was crushing me, pounding down on every dead cell and nerve inside my body. I was unable to fight the feelings, the pull towards Bella.

_Oh god, what I have I done?_


	5. Chapter 5

**I've gotten a couple messages and reviews commenting on the fact that in chapter four Edward needed his feelings for spelled out for him. I only have two this to say about this. First of all, if you have read **_**MIDNIGHT SUN**_** you will find Alice had to do the same for him then. And also, even though he may be a mind reader, Mrs. Meyer shows us that Edward is actually very stupid when is comes to girls. **

**Oh, and also I am really sorry for all of the grammar and spelling mistakes in my writing. Usage and mechanics is my kryptonite. **

**I own nothing. Than you for all the reviews! **

**I am sorry for the shortness of this Chapter, but I promise the next will hold much more information on Bella's past. **

Chapter 5

"So, tell s about your self, dear," Esme's soft voice asked me as he gentle hand formed a cuff around my arm, pulling me towards the couch.

I heard this question somewhere in the back of my mind, but couldn't seem to be able to concentrate on it—to completely understand it—when Edward standing two feet from me. He was suddenly the focus point of all of my senses.

Why was I so obsessed with him? Was it because he was beautiful?

No, I didn't think so. I had seen many beautiful men of our kind before—they are as common as guilty men in jail. No, when I looked--or perhaps _leered_ is the more appropriate term—at Edward, I found myself most focused on the things about him that made _him_—made him unique. That crooked smile. The way he would arch one eyebrow high on his forehead. How he'd run his fingers through his copper hair.

I had a vague recollection of sitting on the couch next to Esme, but my head refused to turn from Edward.

_What _was_ it about him? _

I wasn't able to tear my eyes away from his back until his entire form had excited the house. An odd feeling resound in my chest—it was like my heart was being pulled out of me, following Edward.

"Bella?"

I snapped my head back around to face Alice, who wore a knowing smile on her elfin face. Both Carlisle and Esme sat beside me on the couch, but each had turned to look away. I dropped my eyes shamefully. What would they think of the monster they had caught ogling their son? '

"So, Bella, tell us about yourself." Alice repeated Esme's question.

I sighed sadly. "There's not much to tell I'm afraid."

"That's not true!" Alice half shouted at once. Esme shot her a glance and she grew quite again, crossing her small arms over her chest stubbornly. "Well it's not." She muttered angrily.

Carlisle smiled at me kindly, ignoring his…_daughter's_ outburst. "Are you gifted Isa…Bella," he hesitated over my nickname, as though unsure what my response would be. I was, strangely, growing to like the endearing name. It felt like I was …_different_ with the Cullens. With James's coven I was the quite, stupid, weak Isabella. Here I was simply _Bella. _

"No," I answered Carlisle. "I'm not gifted." Then a pause. "Are…you, sir?"

It had been so long since I had taken part in polite conversation before. I wasn't sure if the same rules I remembered briefly from my human days still applied now.

All three of the Cullens laughed lightly; soprano, alto, and tenor. It was a magical melody.

"Carlisle, please," the blonde angel said, a chuckle still present in his voice. "And no, only Alice, Jasper, and Edward posses a gift here."

"Edward?" I squeaked out, surprised. I, once again, saw Alice's sly grin spread over face at my outburst. I lowered my eyelashes bashfully before meeting her gaze again, shyly. "May I…may I ask what you can do, Alice?" I asked her tentatively.

Alice's mood seemed to change like quicksilver. One millisecond she was suspicious and the next she was elated. "I see visions of the future," she said bouncing as if she were vibrating. My jaw opened, shocked. Before I could comment, however, Alice began speaking again. "And I saw you, Bella! Being here with us—but with _gold_ eyes. And you were laughing and smiling—oooh! And _Edward _really liked having you here." She said, arching her eyebrows suggestively. "He can read minds—that's his gift. Jasper's an empathy and—"Her attention was diverted as her mate entered and she waved him over, grinning brightly before returning her focus to me, "and I get to make you an entire wardrobe Bella! From _scratch_" she whispered the word in awe. Then her brows scrunched together in confusion. "But I should probably wait until we get up to Denali, speaking of which, Carlisle—"she turned her head to the man in question, smiling again, "We should leave sometime around afternoon. I'll starting packing up our room." She turned to me again, hopped off her chair and gave me a tight hug, kissing my cheek as she did. Grabbing Jasper's hand and racing up the stairs, she called "Welcome to the family, Bella!"

I blinked a few times, almost tempted to pinch myself, just to make sure I hadn't imagined that entire scenario.

"I'm sorry about her," Esme said, patting my knee reassuringly. "It takes some time to get used to Alice. She's somewhat of a tornado." She turned to her husband, kissing him lightly on the I turned my eyes, embarrassed slightly by watching their affections. "I'll go start on the kitchen," she smiled again at me before leaving.

"You're moving?" I asked Carlisle nervously. "Because of…_me_?"

Carlisle shrugged. "It was getting around that time any way. And besides, Esme has been looking for an opportunity to spruce up the Denali house. I should get working on the study."

"What can I do to help?" I asked immediately, standing up. "If your family is moving because of me, the very _least_ I can do is help pack."

"You can help me with the library…if you would like to, of course." The all too familiar velvet voice rang out, caressing me with just words.

Both Carlisle and I turned to see Edward leaning casually against the doorframe. I fidgeted nervously. Something told me I would be blushing again, if I could. Why did he always make me feel so embarrassed needlessly?

I saw Carlisle stare intently, as if asking a question, at Edward and then saw the latter shake his head stubbornly. Carlisle arched a brow and Edward's gaze touched on me before he sighed and then shook his head again, less vigorously this time.

Carlisle must have seen my confounded expression, because he chuckled softly, facing me again. His golden eyes were filled with amusement, and…hope? Happiness? "I'm sorry, Bella." He apologized. "Because of Edward's skill we often find ourselves conversing with him silently. You be doing it soon, no doubt."

I heard Edward laugh loudly—much louder than his previous chuckles. The sound sent a shock wave through me, echoing to the very core of myself. I took it a staggering breath, calming my self down.

"I highly doubt _that_, Carlisle." He said, grinning brightly.

Carlisle frowned. "What do you mean, Edward?" he asked slowly.

"She's blocking me."

Oh, this _blocking_ situation again? What _was_ he talking about! How incredibly infuriating this beautiful boy was growing to be!

Carlisle apparently understood the nonsense Edward was spurting, because his kind eyes grew to be the size of quarters. "You mean…you… you can't…"

"Not at all." Edward answered, grinning as though he was excited about a new found secret.

Carlisle's eye returned their gaze to me, though they seemed different this time. Instead of the kind, patient looks he had given me thus far he now gazed at me as though I was an experiment. He traced over my features with a staggering insanity, curiosity calling through his face.

I was being to grow nervous that he would start circling me when he suddenly snapped out it, looking back to Edward. "Well," he said a chuckle obvious in his voice. "That's ironic."

Finally, I managed to build up enough courage to interject. "I'm sorry," I called out feebly. "But I don't understand what you're—"

"I can't read your mind." Edward interrupted me, his tone sharp.

It may be shameful to think so, but the first emotion that flooded through me was _relief_. Pure, instantaneous relief that he hadn't been able to hear every inane thing I had ever thought about him. Then curiosity struck. Why would _I_ be the only one immune? Was I the only one? What did this mean? Were the Cullens going to deem me a freak of nature and refuse to let me stay with them? Did Edward hate me?

_Did_ Edward _hate_ me?

_Oh god,_ the very though of this gorgeous creature _detesting_ me made my entire frame feel so fragile and delicate, like the lightest touch could break me. Dread filled my heart. I realized that I wanted Edward—no, _needed_ Edward—to like me. He had to. I could explain why, but he did.

"I'm sorry," I managed to choke out, barely supporting my own weight anymore.

I heard both of the Cullen men chuckle again. "That's nothing to be _sorry_ for, Bella," Carlisle said gently. He nodded over at Edward, suggesting that we go ahead and work on the library.

"Right this way, Bella," Edward told me, motioning for me to follow him.

His intense stare met mine again and I felt the familiar tingle set off in my boy.

_That_ was growing extremely annoying.


	6. Chapter 6

**OKay, so this chapter is actually a little longer than usual and gives us all the dirty details of Bella's past. I hope you like it! Love reviews! **

Chapter 6

I re-entered the house feeling far more confident in this scenario than I had previously. Because now, thank god, I had a plan.

A strong, practically fool proof plan.

I knew, even with my special abilities, that Jasper was entirely correct. I did, unfortunately, have romantic notions for Bella.

This is wrong.

I am not…_worthy_ of having a mate. I have spent more than a hundred years in solitude for a reason, and just because I meet a beautiful goddess whose very character has mesmerized me completely does not mean I have any right to take her.

I am not fit for a mate. I scowl at children, frown at lighthearted joy and flinch at open affections. I am scrooge, and lovely Isabella deserves better than the crotchety old man I surely am.

So I would avoid her. Stay as far away as possible.

And, first and foremost, _stick_ to the plan.

No matter how she temps me, the plan is all.

I repeat this to myself constantly as I begin my march into the living room. I heard Alice, Jasper, and Esme all packing up. We are leaving for Denali tomorrow, after JAmes's threats. I agree with decsion immediantly, wanting to take Bella as far away from any danger as soon as possible. I dhould begin boxing up my room--my CD collection, after all, usually takes a far amount of time to properly store.

I head for the direction of the stair case, but stops as two voices fill my mind.

The first I know better than my own. It is purely mental. Carlisle is pondering something, though I am only able to catch a vauge sense of curiousity from his mind.

The second I head out loud, being spoken.

It is beautiful, bell-like voice that have only heard a handful of times before.

And quite suddenly, my entire plans falls to peices, shattering like a stain glass windown being dropped from the top of the church.

I realize, mentaly slapping myself, that this plan is obviously _not_ full proof.

Because I am acting like an _awful_ idiot.

I want to stay away from Bella. Or, rather, I know I _should _want to.

But I can't.

Because she is only a room away, seperated by only a thin wall, and I need to be near her like a human needs oxygen. More than that, honestly. I want to know her. Her likes. Her dislikes. Everything there is _to _know, I wish to.

I forget the plan.

I'll re-examine it later.

Rught now, I simply need Bella. No fact has ever been more clear to me.

I walk into the living room in just enough time to hear Bella demand she help us pack. I am lured, at first, to ask her to help with my room. But then I see how my most nobel of intentions--to get to _know_ her--might construde as something else entirely. Especailly to certain memebers of my family.

Namely, Emmett.

So intead I offer to help her with the library, telling myself I will attend to my room when I have the time.

She and my father both turn when they hear my voice, and I see Bella shift from one foot to the other, nervously Her eyes will nt look into mine. Why is she so embarrassed to be around me? She didn't act this way with any of my family memebers?

Did Bella dislke me?

Before the dread can begin to sink into the hard shell of my dead heart over this possibility, Carlisle calls my name silently.

I direct my attention to him, all the while keeping Bella in my periphial vision.

_Edward,_ my father reapeats._ Is there something you would like to tell me, concerning Bella? __Perhaps concerning_ you_ as well?_

I shake my head vinemintly, though we both know it's a lie.

_Are you sure about that_? he askes again.

I look over to Bella, my eyes slidding over her slender beautiful form and imagining what it would be like if now--after all of this--I never saw her again.

The pain that image caused was underscribable.

It was worse than the transformation--hot wires of lava being pulled slowly through every cell in body. hsi was worse than that, because that only lasted three days.

Ths, however, would last a life time. Forever.

I turned back to Carlisle and shakily shook my head once more.

My father noticed Bella's confused and mildly frustrated look, and chuckled lightly, apologizing for our private converstaion. "You be doing it soon, no doubt." he assured her.

I laughed loudly at that.

I had forgotten, mixed in the confusion of my...._feelings_ for Bella, that no ones else knew her mind was silent to me. ""I highly doubt _that_, Carlisle," I teased my father, enjoying t watching his amazment.

"What do you mean, Edward?" My father asked, confused.

"She's blocking me."

Carlisle gazed at Bella in wonderment, his peaceful growing wilde with excitment. I chuckled again--only _Carlisle_ would be so interested in something like this.

"You mean…you… you can't…"he tried to ask, his thoughts just as incoherent as his words.

"Not at all." I said cheekily.

He looked back at Bella, amazment clear in his gaze. He looked over her features with a scientific edge, trying to guess at what coul possibly be...different about her mind. Although he didn't use the word _diiferent_

He thought something was _wrong_ about her.

I had to hold back a harsh growl from escapping my lips. I was shocked. I had almost _growled_ at my _father_ over a girl I barely knew.

How far would I go to protect Bella? Would I stop at nothing?

It scarred me that I didn't have answer to that question.

Suddenly Carlisle's thoughts turned from curious and theroizing to increbidbly amused. "That's ironic." He commented lightly, laughter thick in his thoughts.

"I'm sorry," Bella said, interupting our discussion. "But I don't understand--"

" I can't read your mind," I told her, still annoyed by Carlisle's _oh, _so appropriate sense of humor.

I saw the gratitude and worry pass over Bella's expression, before it faded, setting into a depressed frown. I wanted to move forward and hold her in my arms, consul her until I could see her soft lips pull up at the corners.

I fought hard against the instincts, flexing my fists to keep from doing something rash.

I couldn't think rashly with Bella around. I had to keep my head on straight, to think logically.

"Im sorry," I heard Bella say, her musical voice harsh and rough.

Carlisle ad I both laughed lghtly in respnse, trying to ease the tenstion in the room.

_Why don't you go distract her, Edward? _

"Right this way, Bella." I told the angel, motioning for her to take the lead to the library.

Bella's thick mane of chestnut hair bushed my shoulder as she passed. I inhaled deeply when a suddenly gulf of air swam past my nose, engulfing my senses. It was the smell of fresh cut freesias and plump strawberries. Or at least, what I could remember of them.

The smell is undoubtedly mouthwatering. But the scent doesn't appeal to me as _appetizing_, but somehow…different.

And it pulls me in, tempting me. The pull is so much stronger than any human blood I've ever encountered and yet the fragrance is so completely other.

I realized, after a moment of white shock, that I smell the perfume of _Bella_.

Her body is positioned slightly in front of my, her back to me. Another feelng came over me--another odd instinct.

I longed to place my hand upon the small of her back; to guide her with a gentle hand.

I was always be gentle for Bella.

When I pushed open the library door, I heard a small gasp come from Bella's rosey pink lips.

"It's beautiful." She whispered, her voice holding awe.

_It's nothing campared to you_, I wanted to tell her.

Instead, I opted for a personal question. "Do you enjoy reading?"

Bella's eyes shifted over the four massive bookshelves, hereyes drinking in the sight of them. She stood on her tiptoes, running her fingers over the spines.

She seemed to worship the objects--treating them as though they were long time lovers.

Her delcate form was drapped by a soft pair of jean shorts--cut up near the thighs like she had worn them often. Her shirt was a torn t-shirt; the front smudged with dirt.

I was so mezmerised by the sight of her that I failed to notice when she began speaking. "I don't remeber," she was saying, her voice small. "But I...I _think_ that I used to when I was human."

"You don't remember your human years well?" I asked, clairfying. I felt like I needed to understand her; to _know _her.

"I recall somethings," Bella told me, her gaze flickering to mine hesitantly. I smiled crookedly at her. I didn't Bella to feel uncomfortable around me.

"I was born in the late 1700's on a farm in southern Virginia," she said, her tone turning quiet and somber. I saddened me, that tone. "My parents died when I was very young," she explained. "I had to learn howto take care of my younger brother, Garrettt, and sister, Sarah. Soemtimes I would have to sign contracts or such, and so I taught myself to read. After that I found my father's old book lying around the house and just grew so..._engrossed _by them. I used to read bed time stories to my siblings.

"I don't rember who changed me," she said, her voice brightening considerebly. "I just know that he looked like an angel. He found me while I was walking from the coner shop one night. After I woke up..." A deep pause.

Edward wanted to tell her that she could stop now, that it wasn't any of his buisness, but he couldn't seem to move his mouth. He was too stunned.

"I was frieghtened." She all but whispered. "I didn't know what had happened or what I was. So I went home, looking for answers. Checking on my family. I went into the stable, because I knew Garrett liked to play there and..." another pause. A deep shaky breath. Bella's form was trembling with unshed sobs. "I ran into to Sarah. She smelled so...so _good_,"she barely breathed out the word, her eyes closing sadly. "I didn't think about it, honestly. I just..._attacked. _And afterwards, when I realized what I had done, I just sat there and held her all night, singing to her. Then I ran. I've never been back.

"I'm a _monster_, Edward. Don't you see? I killed my own sister. I don't...I _can't_ do something like that again." She looked back at me, making eye contact. I suckedin a fast breath, when I saw her face.

She looked heart broken.

I knew I had to do something to save her from this needless guilt she was possesed with.

So i took her in my arms and held her as tight as I could, ignoring the way it made my body shiever.

I was protecting Bella with everything I had.

I always would.

"I won't let you, Bella," I whispered into her ear, vowing it.

Bella nuzzled her face into my chest, sobbing roughly and quivering with dry tears.

And I held her.

Held her as tight as I could.


	7. Chapter 7

**I am so sorry this has taken so long to update, really. Some crap has been going on in my personal life lately and all of my writing has been pushed back. I will be updating more regularly from now on. **

**Also, my one-shot **_**And There She Is **_**hasn't received as many reviews as I would have hoped. I would love some input about it. **

**Again, sorry for the delay,**

**--Bookworm.**

Chapter 7

"That's the last of it." Emmett's thunderous booming voice echoed around us, bouncing off trees and carrying itself through the woods. He placed the last massive cardboard box snugly next to another, filling up his larger-than-life jeep. He brought his arms over his head, slamming down the truck with a violent slam.

The Cullen's and I had just finished packing the house up. The task, surprisingly, took less than eight hours to complete. The beautiful, window filled mansion now sat, looking completely abandoned.

The moon was now high in the sky, casting an ominous glow over the forest surrounding us as we standing around by the garage, preparing to leave.

The Cullen's decided that it would be best to leave immediately because of James's threat. They had friends and a house near Denali they stay in often enough.

And, though both Edward and Carlisle have corrected me sternly for doing so, I feel guilty. So dreadfully guilty.

How is it fair that one stray nomad come into this perfect and content family and threaten its existence? Shouldn't they be angry at me, furious, even?

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jasper's head of blonde hair swivel in my direction, stirring the air around him as he did. I inhaled deeply, tasting the scent of fur and water on my tongue. Jasper's eyes narrow slowly, as if he were trying to see something else.

Something that wasn't me, but _beyond_ me.

I looked away awkwardly, only to let my eyes land on the beautiful face of Edward. He is smiling at me gentle, his eyes holding that deep intensity that only Edward can seem to do. I swallow, the burning barely distracting me, as I tried to pull away from our eye contact.

As confused as I was about the rest of the Cullen's seemingly unconditional acceptance of my presence, Edward was confusing me even more.

I told him what I had done.

Done to _Sarah_. My own _sister_.

And yet, when he looked at me, there was no disgust or contempt in his gaze. There was only kindness and compassion of my deadly mistake.

And he _held_ me. He held me snuggly in his arms, so tight it felt like he was trying to mold me inside of him, protect me from everything.

In all of my life, even when my parents were still alive, I had never felt more loved than when I was in Edward's arms.

_Love._

I blinked at myself, surprised that term had even entered my mind.

I was a monster, cruel and vicious. Monsters didn't _love _anything—especially romantically. James's and Victoria's relationship was enough to show that. Mates used each other for physical gratification in my world. Nothing more.

But the _Cullen's_ world was different than mine.

The Cullen's _did_ love. They loved their mates with an intensity I'd never seen before. It amazed me beyond comparison. But beyond just mates, they loved their family. Their brothers, sister, and even _parents_. They loved deeply and in so many ways.

I hadn't loved since that fateful day when I walked into my home, drinking the life out of my sister's screaming body.

And now, all of a sudden, I was expressing a feeling similar to _love_ when I was with Edward.

What was wrong with me? Why did my bones feel like they melted when he was with me? The fire burn when he touched my skin?

What _was he doing_ to me?

Alice, her light soprano voice showering with delight, interrupted my thoughts, saying "Alright, Emmett can take the jeep, Rosalie the M3, I'll take the Vanquish—" she smiled, brightly at Edward, grinning, and he gave her a small nod back, his eyes still on me—" and Jazz can take the bike. Carlisle and Esme take the Mercedes, and Edward gets the Volvo, obviously, and Bella can ride with him, sound good?"

My eyes large at this statement, probably taking up a good portion of my head.

Alone, in a car, with Edward? For _hours_?

I wasn't sure how I was going to handle a situation like this. My mind was spinning rapidly, trying to find someway to take myself out of such a dangerous position. Before I can interject, however, Jasper does the honors for me.

"Alice," he says lightly, smiling knowingly at his bright eyed-mate. "Why don't Bella and I take the Vanquish?"

I see Alice's eyes narrow in pointed suspicion before they open abruptly, glassing over. I start to walk over to her, scarred for her well-being. Before I can reach Alice, however, she snaps out of it and smiled. The sight of it is dazzling and for a moment I am stunned by the level of happiness she is able to contract.

"Alright then," she chirps in her soprano voice, spinning quickly on her heel and throwing her leg over the sleek motorcycle. "Let's go."

Edward looks over at me, frowning. The sight makes my heat ache silently in my chest, pulling me closer to him.

I want to make Edward smile again, to see that crooked grin spread widely across his face. I'm not sure how to set about accomplishing such a task so, I smile at him hesitantly.

The corners of his angelic mouth lifts slightly, but the sadness stays in his eyes.

Carlisle and Esme leave directly after Alice, speeding off on the dirt round. They are followed shortly by Rosalie and Emmett, the flash of Rosalie's red convertible flashing my eyes in the sun.

Edward stands in front of both Jasper and I, his gaze locked on me until I grow anxious.

He nods to Jasper politely and then, moves closer to me. He takes one step forward and then stops, seeming embarrassed at his motivation.

I'm not sure what makes me do it—what impulse forces me forward—but I soon find myself wrapping my arms around Edward's waist, pushing my head into his chest. I breathe in his scent, amazed by the amount of comfort this position brings me. Before I make this more awkward than I already have, I pull back, smiling again. He's smiles back this time, and my entire world brightens at the sight.

"Thank you, Edward" I tell him, forcing the sincerity to show deep in my monstrous scarlet orbs. "Thank you for everything."

"There's no need, Bella," he whispers, his voice gentle. His hand reaches up to brush back my hair that falls over my eyes and my eyelids flutter at the sensation from his gentle caress. "I'll see you in Denali." He pulls away slowly, sitting in the small Volvo and driving off. My eyes don't leave the car until it is completely from my sight.

Jasper clears his throat and I freeze, momentarily surprised. Edward's presence seems to have blocked everything else from my mind.

I lower my eyes, embarrassed. A soft chuckle echoes from Jasper's lips, causing the embarrassment to erupt ten-fold.

"Would you like to drive, Bella?" Jasper asks, breaking the silence.

"Me?" I look up and blink at him, puzzled by his offer.

He laughs again, more amused than before. "I won't tell Edward if you don't." He says, mock whispering.

"I can't drive." I inform him bluntly.

"At all?"

"No."

We stay silent for another moment before he smiles kindly and offers, "We'll have to teach you then, won't we?"

I shrug nonchalantly, walking around to place myself in the passenger's seat.

Jasper climbs in next to me, starting the car with a low purr of the engine. I run my hand's along the leather seats, admiring their smoothness and softness of the material.

Jasper notices my admiration and smirks, asking "Do you like it?"

"I do." I tell him honestly, unable to keep the full intensity from my tone. I've only ever been in a handful of cars before, but this was by far the best. It was sleek and smooth; elegant in its beauty. "How fast does it go?" I wondered out loud, curious. Truthfully, I'd had never bothered to drive before. Why sit in a machine if I could run the same speed?

Jasper laughs loudly, enjoying my question for some reason. "Tops speeds of 280," he tells me at last, chuckles still obvious in his tone.

My eyes grow big, admiration clear as I speak. "Correction. I _love_ this car."

Jasper laughs louder than ever, practically shaking with his musical glee. I swear I hear him mutter "Figures," but he doesn't explain and I don't ask.

The next hour of the ride is spent in comfortable silence between us, and it isn't until Vancouver that Jasper speaks again.

"Has Alice told you my gift," he asks, although I am more than sure he knows the answer.

"Yes."

"So you know I can sense what people around me feels?"

"Yes." I am failing to see where Jasper is going with this topic of conversation.

"I can tell what _you_ feel, Bella. About, Edward, particularly."

I freeze, all of my muscle locked in shock and pain. Was Jasper about to tell me I was going insane, that these feelings were idiotic?

Or was he about to tell me what I already knew—that I wasn't pure enough to even consider putting myself into the Cullen's and _Edward _lives.

"_That_ is just what I want to talk to you about, Bella," Jasper tells me, his voice turning surprisingly stern. He turns his face on mine, making eye contact. "You _are_ worth more than that, Bella. More than you give yourself credit for."

I shake my head, knowing he is wrong. "I've killed people, Jasper. I'm not like you—"

"I've killed people too, Bella. Many more than you have, I'm sure."

Quiet takes over the car for more than a full minute, absorbing through the thick layer of stress echoing room each of us. Jasper begins to speak again, and I stay silent, because I can tell he does not wish to be interrupted.

"I was changed in the southern newborn wars." He looks back at me, "I'm sure you've heard of them?"

I nod solemnly.

"I was in charge of babysitting the youngest ones, to some extinct. My ability gave me more of an advantage then most. I broke away from my creator later in life, when she was about to kill me. I went out on my own, killing humans. It hurt so much, having to feel my prey's fear. I pitied every human I ate.

"Alice found me in a small, smoke filled bar, and I knew I loved her. There were no second thoughts or wondering. It was instantaneous. Undeniable."

He glances at me, as though sending a message.

" When Alice told me that I didn't have to kill humans anymore, I felt the same thing you did. The overbearing joy and relief. The crushing shame. All of it.

"What I'm trying to say is that if someone like me—who has killed _both_ of our kind in cold blood (so to speak)—is meant for someone like Alice, then you and Edward are plenty suited for each other."

His golden gaze locks on mine and his expressions turns deadly serious, as though he is speaking absolute truth.

"Making mistakes doesn't make us monsters, Bella. Not when we have an angel to help us take them back. And, trust me when I say, you and Edward both need an angel."


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey Everyone!**

**I am so, so horrible sorry that I haven't updated in a while! Hopefully this will make it up to you some! **

**I love reviews—this chapter made me a bit nervous. **

** --Bookworm**

Chapter 8

Epov

In the past centaury, I am proud to say that my cowardice has been almost non- existent. As a self imposed rule, I didn't run from my fears. I faced them—conquered them.

When I woke up with a guilty and anxious Carlisle standing over my newly reformed body, the first reaction I had was not to shut my ruby eyes in confused fright, but to lash out.

If faced with an opponent I know to be stronger than me, I would rather breathe my last breath in the ashes than run.

So how, I must ask myself, do I find myself hiding in the solitude of my room, because of a girl? One measly, ungifted, unconfrontational, girl frightened _me_? How could I allow this to happen?

But of course, I didn't have much of a choice in the matter.

I knew, somewhere deeper than my rational mind, that Bella was so much more than _some girl_.

I had met plenty of _girls_.

Bella was a beautiful, enchanting, intelligent, and mesmerizing woman.

And she terrified me more then an entire army of newborns on the rampage.

So, at the moment, I was cowering in my room, pretending to be organizing my music.

Across the hall from me, Alice and Esme sat in the unfurnished room now designated as Bella's, trying to decide on a decoration scheme. I knew, no matter how much my annoyingly precedents sister argued, she purposely selected the room nearest to mine for Bella. She, along with every other one of my family members, had already made up their minds that Bella and I were destined to be madly in love.

I did not love Bella.

I did not love Bella…yet.

I was definitely going to fall in love with Bella.

And this was most certainly a large problem.

Bella was new to this life—new to my family. Her life was changing at a rapid pace and she was going to need time to adjust. The last thing she was going to need right now was me swooping in to complicate everything with my developing feelings.

Impending feelings.

Possible feelings.

Definite feelings.

So I would wait to speak to her about my possible.. appearing… impending.. emotions.

I would get to know her first, know everything. And, with any luck, I'll discover that she s just as uninteresting as the rest of the girls I've met and I'll move on. Doubtful, but one can hope. MY curiosity with her was more than about her silent mind. It was something…more.

It was that shy little smile she gave when she was uncomfortable. How she timidly approached people in conversation, like she was afraid of offending them. That spark in her eyes as she gaze at the old library.

Normally, she was beautiful. But it was the little things—the wonderful details—that made her glorious.

And, simply because she was so magnificent, I found myself spying on her.

I watched her through Esme's eyes, knowing that her kind thoughts would be unlikely to anger me. At the present, she was looking fondly at Bella as Alice circled around her, verbally talking out her new planned wardrobe.

_She's so sweet,_ Esme was thinking. _And so patient. Look at how she deals with Alice. Polite, considerate, friendly. It took everyone else months to handle her like this—years, in Edward's case. Some times his temper still gets in the way._ I smirked at that.

Suddenly, my mother's thoughts were solely focus on an image on Bella and I together, her small had encircled by mine. I was gazing down at her, brushing a strand of hair from her face. The picture brought a strange feeling to the pit of my stomach, quivering rapidly. I swallowed, a thick flow of venom burning my throat that I quickly ignored. I refocused back on my mother's thoughts.

_She would be so good for him. She's strong enough to hold Edward together when he throws his temper tantrums._ I chuckled at the term. _She would be patient enough for him, absolutely intelligent enough. And she is so beautiful. She needs a strong, firm hand that will guide her lovingly. He needs someone to show him what love—_our love—_is. They would be so good for each other._

Would I be good for Bella? Could I be the man Esme saw me as?

For Bella, I would be willing to try.

From below me, in the study, I heard Carlisle call my name mentally.

Braving the world outside of my room, I stepped outside my door. And, of course, because my luck absolutely horrendous lately, Bella appeared out of her door the same second I did.

She froze tersely, her already large doe shaped eyes growing to the size of quarters.

"Hello." She said finally, breaking the long moment of silence.

"Hello." I repeated. Then, hesitantly, "How are you."

Bella smiled awkwardly, stepping forward. "Listen, Edward." She said to me, her tone almost resigned. "I just wanted to apologize"

Apologize? What on _earth_ had she done wrong?

"What?" My brow furrowed, confused.

Bella looked away from me, her eyes falling on the ground below her. She clasped her hands together, twiddling her thumbs like a nervous child. "I didn't mean to dump my entire past on you like that. It was incredibly inconsiderate of me. Please, forget I ever mentioned it."

"Bella," I told her, taking several steps towards her until we were just inches apart. Bella looked up at me, her eyes level with my chin. I could feel her chilly breath on my skin. It was exhilarating. "You are more than welcome to "dump your past" on me anytime you like. I very much enjoy talking for you. Please, don't be embarrassed."

She laughed lightly—it was the first time I had ever heard her do that in three days. The sound rumbled through me and—almost involuntarily—my lips pulled up into a lopsided smile.

"You must think I'm insane." She murmured, her dark hair falling in front of her face, shielding the beautiful site from my view.

That was, and is, completely unacceptable.

As gently as possible, I slowly reached up and placed the palm of my hand on Bella's soft pale cheek. My skin tingled with indescribable electricity. A strange feeling rushed through he air, absorbing inside my very being. I closed my eyes, basking in the warmth pulsing through my body. Again, moving so carefully she might have been made of glass, I moved my finger tips upwards, brushing her hair out of the way of her face.

Her skin was so soft against mine, so smooth. I could only imagine how the rest of her felt, touching the supple skin hidden by annoying clothing. As if miles away, I heard a faint gasp echoed through Bella's lips.

My eyes fluttered open, only to see that hers were closed.

It was if my body no longer belonged to me—as though my actions were being controlled by a force unknown to me. And I couldn't stop it; couldn't find the rational portion of my mind I knew must be lingering there somewhere.

I leaned forward, bending my head closer to hers. My lips were less than an inch from Bella's malleable rose ones—so close I could almost taste her.

And I had to.

I had to taste her. I couldn't wait any—

"Err…should I come back?"

Bella's eyes flew open at the same second I pulled back, shocked. It was like the tight bubble we were surrounded in had suddenly been broken. I looked down the stairs to see a smirking Emmett below us, his thought loud and amused.

Had I been so absorbed in Bella's presence that I had been unable to hear him.

Hear anyone?

The idea was oddly comforting.

I dropped my hand from Bella's face, immediately saddening at the loss of contact. I flexed my fingers into a fist, fighting the urge to touch her again.

"No," I answered, both my brothers words and spoken thoughts—_About to get laid_? "We were just talking." I looked back to Bella. "I'll see you later."

And, forcing myself not to look back, I fled the scene, Emmett hot on my heels.

As soon as we neared the study—out of Bella's hearing rage, unless she was concentrating—he asked me, "What the hell was that about."

"Nothing."

He snorted, in his head and out loud, "Nothing my ass. That was full of a shit load of something."

"Forget is Emmett."

He laughed again, giving a little jump of triumph. "Ha! So you admit there is something _to _forget!"

I sighed deeply, pushing open the door to Carlisle's study. "Shut up, Emmett." I shut the door before he could enter.

He laughed, the sound bouncing off the house walls.

Carlisle looked up from his desk, shuffling the job forms he was filing out away. He smiled at me kindly, an amused glint entering his wise and patient eyes.

"Is you brother bothering you again?"

I rolled my eyes half heartedly, plopping down in the chair across from him. "When isn't he?" I glanced around at the newly furnished office, noting the appearance. "It looks good."

"Esme." He said as way of explanations.

"Ah."

He switched our conversation to mental communication, as it was usual with us. _So,_ he asked me,_ how well does Bella seem to be settling in? _

I looked away, forcing myself to reply casually. "As well as she can, I would think."

_You don't know? _

I smirked again, reminding him. "I can't hear her."

He laughed again, a full chuckle this time. _I know, it just amuses me to hear you admit it. That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. _

He had my interest peaked now. I looked towards him, quirking my brow questioningly. "Hmm? How so?" 

_ I wanted to bring __Eleazar to meet Bella. _

I frowned. "But why? She isn't gifted."

Carlisle shook his head, seeming almost disappointed. This time, he answered verbally. "And how many individuals do you know that you can't read?" He inquired rhetorically. When I didn't comment, he went on. "I think she may be more gifted than even she knows. Eleazar will certainly be able to tell us." His gaze shifted to the window.

I knew this—from years of reading Carlisle—that he was about to tell me something unpleasant. _Tanya called_, he unformed me. _She wants to bring the family over sometime this week. She wants to bring the family over sometime this week. She seemed rather… enthused…the see us again. Or _you_ in particular. _

I groaned loudly, tossing my head back. I wasn't looking forward to fighting off Tanya's affections again.

Especially now…with Bella here.

"She's a close friend of mine," Carlisle reminded me gently. "We should treat her with respect."

"She doesn't much respect me," I muttered angrily, crossing my arms in a childlike fashion.

Carlisle chuckled at my immature action. "Be the bigger man, won't you, Edward?"

I rolled my eyes, but said nothing else.

Carlisle stood from his chair, heading towards the door. _I was just about to take Bella out for her first hunt. Would you like to join us?_

Yes.

I stood as well, nodding and following my father out. He headed up the stairs to fetch Bella.

I swallowed, nervous.

Quite suddenly, I found myself feeling like a teenage boy about to take a girl he fancied out on a date.

How odd.

And oddly appropriate.

I fixed my gaze on the floor boards beneath me, breathing and out deeply.

What was I going to do?


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

BPOV

I've never been kissed before.

When I was human, I remember a few of the town boys offering to walk me home and "accidently" lean towards me once or twice.

Laurent, although he had made his feelings perfectly apparent, had never actually tired anything physical with me. James had, a few times, but Victoria always managed to intercede before anything could properly take place.

But, even I, who was lacking any real romantic experience after more than two hundred years, could see the signs Edward was sending me.

He was going to kiss me.

At least, _ I thought_ he was going to kiss me.

And then, after Emmett interrupted us, I wasn't so sure.

The look in Edward's eyes was shocked and…was that shame I saw? Or disgust?' Oh, God, he was disgusted by me.

Edward removed his hand from my face immediately, flexing into a fist. Anger.

He was angry with me.

I struggled to concentrate on their conversation, my mind too deep in despair from both Edward's reactions and the loss of his hand on my cheek.

He and Emmett both turned away, only a casual "I'll see you later," coming from Edward.

As soon as they had rounded the corner, I sat on the stair, numb from his rejection.

The heart in my chest should have been beating loudly, thudding for the entire house to hear. It still surprised me, sometimes, how much I expected my old human reactions to kick in.

I slumped on the steps for a few moments, trying to force my brain from the haze that had taken over.

Edward didn't like me. He didn't feel the…puzzling desperation I did.

I knew this already, of course, but I had no idea how much _pain_ irrupted in my dead heart by having it confirmed.

Why did it matter to me so much?

So what if one man—one man I had met less than a _week_ ago—didn't care for me? Why did his opinion mean so much to me?

It shouldn't.

I never cared when Victoria called me stupid, or James treated me like a piece of meat made for his entertainment. I have never put much stock in others thoughts of me.

Before now.

Before Edward.

I had to stop caring what he thought.

Or he could kill me.

I had to distance myself from Edward, to make sure he couldn't affect me anymore. Giving the power to make me feel the thing I felt was too dangerous.

But what could I do?

How could I stop myself from speaking to him? It seemed like such an impossible goal.

He was incredibly charming and kind. I had just poured my soul out to him, thrust upon my entire sad story and he seemed the most patient of people.

He was beautiful. Smart. Passionate.

I didn't know what I could do.

I was so drab and boring, how could I do anything but be drawn to his magnificence? I was a plain moth, swarming next to Edward's dazzling light.

"Bella!" Alice light, high pitched yell of elation echoed through the house. I sighed. As much as Alice's sisterly affections warmed my otherwise cold heart, I couldn't help but feel slightly overwhelmed by her ridiculous amounts of enthusiasm. And, although she might sometimes be a tad too much to handle, I felt so comfortable around Alice, even lively as she was.

I felt so at ease around almost all of the Cullens, as a matter of fact.

Both Carlisle and Esme had been more kind than I disserved in the past few days, their parental affections making my red eyes melt with gratitude. My parents, in my human life, died when I was barely fourteen years old. I had to learn to cook, clean, take care of the farm and the family. I barely had any time to grieve for the at first and now, after my transformation, I have nary a memory of them. The attention I had been receiving from the leader figures of this strange coven were so new to me, so odd. I wasn't sure how to adjust to them.

Emmett and Rosalie had been distant, though kind. Whenever the largest of the two was around he often flashed me a cheeky smile and a brotherly pat upon the head as he did Alice. Sometimes the action saddened me slightly. As much as I loved my sister Sarah—and would do give my own life in return for hers in an instant—I always had a closeness with my younger brother. Garrett was only two years my junior, and had outgrown me before I reached the age of fifteen. I remember more about him then anything else from my former life. My heart ached for him constantly.

Jasper had, surprisingly, put me more at ease than any other of his family members. Part of me suspects that he does this for everyone—that it is simply his nature. But, on another level, I knew that we were a like. We were both quiet, reserved people. Neither of us had always abstained from humans like most of the Cullens. We both found this life later and had grown fond of it.

I knew Jasper was still having trouble with the diet the Cullens took on and I was worried it would be the same for me. Esme constantly encouraged me to think positive, but I was doubtful.

My thoughts of Esme seemed to awaken me from my stupor. I glanced up to see the face of Carlisle standing in front of me, his smile kind. I blinked for a moment, shocked. Sometimes it seemed as though Carlisle's compassionate, kind, and sincere face could be the face of God.

In the back of my mind I heard someone below us shift their weight hesitantly.

"Bella?" Carlisle asked, drawlingly in my attention.

I heard the light, dancing like footsteps of Alice appear behind me—they seemed impatient. "Bella!" her sprit like voice whined from my rear, "I called you! Now we don't have time to finish your measurements!"

"Why don't we have time?" I asked, turning to see her pouting face. With her lower lip pushed out so far she almost looked like a toddler upset about being refused their favorite toy. I had the strangest instinct to break out in girlish giggles. How odd.

"We're going hunting!" She chirped out, loud enough for the entire house to hear.

I swallowed nervously, folding my hands together to kept from gripping the stairwell for dear life. I had never been hunting the Cullens' way before. What if I was absolutely miserable? What if I _couldn't_ do it?

Would they make me leave?

"C'mon Bella!" Alice chirped out excitingly, leading me down the stairs.

At the foot of the stairs stood a tall and majestic Edward, leading gently against the rail. The sight of him, as usual, did strange thing to me. If I had a pulse, it would have quickened. If able, my skin would have been mopped in nervous sweat. I turned my head, forcing my hair o fall in a curtain in front of me.

Edward was, undeniably, the one Cullen I did not feel comfortable around.

If felt so much more than that.

Hesitantly, afraid of being spotted, I lifted my head, meeting Edward's honey eyes.

I dropped my gaze again, embarrassed.

"Ready to go?" Emmett/s loud voice boomed from outside.

From beside me I hear Edward sigh loudly.

I blanched. We were _all_ going?

Jasper—now appeared next to his wife—sensed my anxiousness. He placed a friendly hand on my shoulder, a sharp feel of calm over taking me.

"Subtle, Jasper," Edward muttered, turning to head for the door.

Alice and Jasper followed behind him and I watch, mesmerized, a they disappeared outside.

"Nervous, Bella?" Carlisle asked, smiling at me warmly.

"Yes," I admitted. "I don't think I'm going to do very well at this."

"Give yourself more credit than that, I'm sure you'll do fine."

_Doubtful._

With a gentle hand on my upper back, Carlisle pushed my through the door.

Outside I was greeted by each one of the Cullens—minus Edward, that is.

Alice, whether her husband told her or through her own perception, was able to see my hesitation about hunting. "You'll do perfectly fine, Bella." Then a wink. "I can see it."

"Besides, " Edward interjected, a chuckle present in his honey-velvet voice, "You can't be much worse than Emmett was his first time."

"Hey!" his older brother boomed out, feigning insult. "I was pretty damn good!"

"You knocked over half the forest!"

"Sound like another first of ours, eh Rosie?" he leered at his wife, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

"Oh, shut up." Rosalie said quickly. With one small nod to me, she sped off into the forest, the thick trees shielding her from site.

Emmett followed after, still calling words of humor.

"There's some bears in the southwest I want to catch before Emmett does," Jasper said to Alice, his tone rushed.

The small woman giggled like a school girl. "That won't be a problem. In about…oh, four point two seconds, he and Rose will be acting very…_improper_."

Both Jasper and Edward wrinkled their nose in distaste, as the empathy and his mate sped off.

"Edward," I heard Esme say to her son. I carefully avoided making eye contact with any of the three remaining vampires. "Why don't you show Bella around."

"You don't have to," I tried to say quickly, not wanting anyone to feel pressured.

"It'd be a pleasure, Bella." Edward said as I foolishly looked up at his face. He smiled crookedly and I had to blink a few times. My thoughts froze for a moment at the beautiful site.

"If…you're sure," I said at last.

The smile stayed in place as he motioned with his hand for me to go first. I heard a small chuckle echo behind us and ducked my head, embarrassed again.

I took off into the woods, making sure to steer clear of Emmett and Rosalie's path.

When I was about a mile or so in, Edward hot on my heels, I stopped, turning to face him again.

"Alright, Bella," he said carefully, as if weighing his words. "Ready?"

I gave small "hmm" of approval, not trusting my voice.

He stepped directly behind me, his breath on my neck sending the oddest vibrations down my spine. I was hyper aware of his presence now, his smell floating in my nose. I breathed it in deeply, my eyelids fluttering at the sensation. "Close your eyes," he whispered in a voice that melted o sensuality. Nervous, I did so.

"What do you hear?" he asked me.

_You_ I wanted to say. The way his breath melted with the wind, how his lips brushed together with every word. The sound of his hair as the wind swirled it around.

However, I knew this was not the answer he was looking for.

I searched outwards, focusing an anything that sounded…appetizing.

About half a mile away a loud, thudding sound hit my ears, my mouth flowing with venom, and I recognized it immediately.

A heart.

I breathed on again, looking past Edward's glorious smell until the scent of blood hit my nostrils. I wrinkled my nose in distaste. It was if someone had taken a perfect amount of blood and mixed it with something rotten.

"I know it's not very appealing," Edward said, his voice directly at my ear, "But you'll get used to it."

"What is it?" I asked, barely moved my lips.

I heard a smile in his voice. "Mountain lion. My favorite. There's three of them."

With that I took off, following the trail created by the scent of animal blood. As soon as I set eyes on the lean feline animal I pounced, treating the beast like I would any human. We wrestled for a few moments, it's claws piercing the fabric of my clothing and covering my in dirt as we roll. My teeth pierced it's neck the red liquid pouring out in my mouth. It wasn't as sweet as human, but it wasn't bad by any means. I drank and filled my self, finishing with a satisfied grunt. When I was finished I rolled the animal's carcass off me.

Edward was standing a few feet away from me, his eyes trained on my form. I looked down.

My shorts were almost non existent—shred cut from the already thin fabric. The top of my t-shirt was completely missing, the top of my left breast exposed. I looked at the ground, glad I couldn't blush.

Edward must think I'm a mess.

"Oops," I breathed out, not knowing what else to say.

In front of me I saw Edward had looked away from my scandal dressed form. He laughed loudly, his chest shaking from the vibrations. HE stopped after a moment shaking his head.

Then, without warning, he began to unbutton his shirt. I watch, unable to look away. He revealed himself in a small white t-shirt, the thin fabric hugging each of his defined muscles. He seemed so less slight now—away from Emmett. I traced the line of his triceps, up onto his glorious chest. The sight made me swallow. A new, strong fluttering took over in the pit of my stomach, pulling my towards something I'd never felt before.

Lust. A heavy, indescribable sense of lust.

For Edward.

"Here," he said to me, pulling my sharply from my wanton thoughts, holding out his button down for me. I lowered my eyelashes shamefully, taking his shirt. I quickly threw it over my body, standing up.

Edward's gaze lingered on my for a slight second, tracing the line of my body, before he looked back on the two other animals, now preparing to run at the loss of their ally.

He lunged at one of them, and I watched shamelessly. His body moved with sensuality, crouching and springing. It took him much less time than me. He simply grabbed the struggling lion by the neck, turned, and brought in his mouth, drinking in his fill. I saw the way his lips curled around the animal's flesh and the sight made the unfamiliar warmth spread though my body, all the way down to my fingertips.

"How do you do that?" I asked, the words pouring from my mouth before I had a chance to stop it.

Edward straightened his pose immediately, revealing a perfectly pristine white t-shirt. He hadn't ruined his appearance at all.

He seemed to know what I was talking about. He laughed lightly. "Centuries of practice," he told me, grinning broadly.

"Centuries?" I asked, "How many?" I wanted to know his age.

I wanted to know everything.

"Just under one," he told me. His face seemed slightly apprehensive. "I was turned around seventeen years old. I'm the youngest here, in that way, at least."

I smiled, hoping to appear playful. "You've got me beat," I informed him, studying the bark of a nearby tree as though it carried the secrets of the universe. "I would have turned seventeen in two months, or so."

A loud, growl suddenly echoed through the woods as both Edward and I turned around, trying to locate the source. "That's Emmett and a bear, I'll guess," then, with a lingering look at my form. "We should proabaly get you changed."

His words made my heart catch fire. "Yes," I said, hoping he didn't catch the underlying meaning in his words, I spoke. "We should."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Why, for all that is holy in this world, did I have to put that thought in my head?

As soon as the words, "We should get you changed," flew out of my mouth, my mind went directly into the proverbial gutter.

Honesty, though, Bella isn't helping the least at keeping my sanity in check.

She lays there—elbows propping her body up, as if posed purposely for me—with her clothing basically ripped to shreds. And _god,_ I can so much.

Her smooth, creamy skin of thigh is visible, her long legs cross out in front of her helplessly. Almost her entire torso, minus the feeble amount of fabric still clinging to her shoulders halfhazardly, is spread open for my eager eyes.

I've never felt this way before.

My head feels like there is a deep fog covering everything important, shielding me from having any logical thought. All I want to do is bend down, hovering over the goddess that is Bella, and run my hands over every inch of her soft skin. I lock my muscles, fighting back the urge.

My want is so powerful it's almost painful.

My eyes must be black, because this is the most…_hunger _ I've ever felt. But—as my discarded dinner proves—I want no food. God, I just want _Bella._

Only one word seems to break the full fledged desire erupting in the bottom pit of my stomach.

Bella's soft voice--now taking on a light air of huskiness that almost pushes my off the cliff of sanity—lets out a gentle "Oops".

I fight off the lustful haze, determined not to take advantage of Bella. She is new to this form of life and needs time to adjust. I would be a cad to show my…feelings when she is going through so difficult of a time.

And then I can't help but laugh a little. Because Bella is laying out before me like a seductress goddess and she says "oops" like a small child.

The irony is not lost on me.

My chuckles die down after a moment, and I purposely keep my eyes from lingering her form.

We should be heading back to the house now, but I am wary. I know, logically, that Bella is not _mine_ but I still want nothing more than this image of her—gorgeous, tempting and alluring—to stay only with me.

Without a second thought, I pull of my shirt, glad that I wore a t-shirt underneath my button up today—the last thing I need is for Emmett to make one of his jokes. And the image of Bella wearing my shirt and I being half naked would most certainly cause Emmett to make some crude comment. And Bella is easily embarrassed. I wouldn't want to make her uncomfortable.

She quickly stand up before I have time to offer her my hand.

I frown, upset by her action.

Did Bella not like chivalry? Was this because she was not used to being treated like a lady, or because she didn't think of me as a gentleman (A/N _Midnight Sun, _page 178)?

Bella looks at me closely, her eyes skimming over my form now. I think—perhaps _hallucinate—_that her gaze lingers on my chest, a soft breath echoing from her lips.

I blink in shock.

Is Bella…_attracted_ to me?

Many other females—human and vampire alike—have thought of how I looked. I'd never given it much thought before—all of my kind are beautiful.

But now, the thought of Bella finding me attractive makes the trembling in my stomach erupt with a new power, causing my lips to fall open slightly.

I am mesmerized by this goddess. I have never been so powerless before.

Bella's eyes, flacks of gold lingering in the seep scarlet, flash over to the small gathering of mountain lions . I wanted to watch her hunt again—to see the seductive way she crept over, her tempting form balanced for affect…I shouldn't risk it. Instead, opting for the safe option, I quickly charged for the animals myself.

I drank them more rapidly than usual, eager to finish so I could be once again with Bella.

By the time I was done, I noticed Bella was watching me.

Her gaze seemed analytical this time, so I didn't have much hope to suspect she was…_interested_ in me any way.

Why should I even hope in this first place? Surely this goddess sees me for the wretch that I am?

"How do you _do_ that?" Bella asks, her gentle voice holding a sight edge of irritation that I find incredibly amusing. Bella—so kind and gentle—sounds adorable when she upset. I have the urge to tease her—to egg her anger on just to hear her anger.

I automatically know what she is referring to. Emmett often complains that I look too "white and pretty" after a hunt. Personally, I just thinks he is bitter because he can't seem to eat his food like an adult.

"Centuries of practice," I inform Bella, unable to conceal my smug grin.

Her interest looks peaked. "Centuries? How many?" she inquires.

"Just under one," I inform her. I become nervous. I want to tell Bella everything about me, but my age…what if she dislike my youth? If she wants someone old? Will I appear immature to her? She was born almost two hundred years before me, what if she finds that unappealing? "I was turned around seventeen years old, I'm the youngest, in that way at least."

Bella smiles, and the sight brightens my entire world. She looks playful. It is the first time I'd ever seen her look so…light before.

She looks, almost impossibly, more beautiful than ever.

"You've got me beat," she tells me, "I would have turned seventeen n two months or so."

And then I said it, _we should probably get you changed. _

And now here I am, an idiot.

I am mesmerized by this goddess. I have never been so powerless before.

Without any warning, Bella takes off through the forest, her speed impressive to for most.

But I, thankfully, am fast.

I catch up to her in a minute, but she is already entering the house. I scan the area quickly for any minds, but I find none.

We are alone.

I step into through the threshold, still on autopilot.

Bella and I are _alone_ in my house.

I feel that, if I were human, my heart would be trying to beat itself out of my chest.

I see Bella's retreating form travel up the steps and I pointedly ignore the way her hips sway from side to side, or the way her hair swing with each step, their thick lockets begging to be touched…

To distract myself—for I have never need distraction more than now—I walk leisurely into the music room, connected to the large living room.

I touch the keys on my piano lovingly, feeling the way they sound under my fingerprints. It is perfectly tuned, of course.

I haven't played in so long, a familiar sense of happiness floods my emotions.

Of course, I am no where as near as happy as I am with Bella.

Suddenly, as if opening a flood gate, a set of notes echoing my brain, turning slowly into a low hum.

The tune is lovely, sweet and light, yet with an underlying sense of strength. I sit down on the piano bench, closing my eyes and letting the gentle song over take my senses.

I layer the gentle tone with more power notes, building a back bone for the piece.

I stop playing momentarily to grab some sheet paper and a pen. Even with photographic memory, I still find it useful to record my pieces.

I stay that way for almost fifteen minutes, scratching and changing the song as necessary until I find just the perfect fit.

And then I do, and it is the most perfect harmony of sound I have ever imagined.

It is low and seductive, innocent and carefree, confident and strong.

But most of all, it is hypnotically beautiful.

It is _Bella_.

I stand up and sit back at the bench with my written work, playing the note carefully. I am pleased to hear it sound better than I'd even thought.

Just as I am reaching the bridge, the sound of a door opening breaks my concentration.

Bella—now freshly showered and changed in a pair of Esme's jeans and a t-shirt—appears in the doorway. My fingers pause on the keys, my eyes training on her form.

She speaks slowly, as if hesitant. "I…I heard you playing. It's beautiful."

I smile briefly at her, before moving my head to the side, beckoning her towards me.

She rises her eyebrows, asking to make sure. I nod again, and she steps in, sitting on the piano bench beside me.

"What was it?" she asks, waving her hand toward the piano. "The song, I mean."

I want to tell her, but grow nervous. Will she like my gift? Will she think it is inappropriate, or will it be unwanted.

"It's new." I begin. "I think…I think it's name is _Bella_. Beautiful." I loom towards her, locking our gaze as to make my words more sincere. "I wrote it for you."

Bella's already large orbs grow ten times bigger, and she doesn't respond for a full moment.

"You wrote me a song?" she asks at last/ Her voice—still as melodious as always—sounds shocked and awed. "Do you write everyone a song?"

I chuckled nervously, shifting my gaze to the piano keys in front of me.

"No, Bella. Just you." An awkward pause. "You're…special to me, Bella. I…I just—"

My words were cut off at one, but I couldn't complain.

Bella and I had had limited contact so far.

A hug.

Gentle touches.

Soft caresses.

But _this_ was so different.

Her lips are like two clouds, pushing against mine with just enough force to feel wonderful. Without really thinking about it, I parted my lips, breathing in her scent. My eyes closed, as did hers. I was lost in bliss.

My hand, of it's own accord, reach to wrap in Bella's thick hair, pushing her towards me with even more pressure. I want—desperately—to do more to her, _with _her, but I don't wish to push her too far.

Bella—of course—has other ideas.

She forces me backwards, knocking the piano bench to the ground and both of us sprawled out on the floor , her body straddling mine.

The lust I had been fighting back broke out with a frightful vengeance.

My actions were longer my own.

I quickly grabbed a hold of Bella's neck, pushing her mouth towards mine again. Plunged my tongue into her mouth and Bella let out a breath moan of my name.

_Lord that _sound!

Bella's small strong hands took hold of my hair, pulling my up to meet her.

Her curves pushed against me. I could feel the heat and softness even through my clothing.

I wanted less clothing.

My hands went to the hem of her shirt, preparing to rip it off her supple body, Alice be damned, before the unthinkable happened.

"Emmett wait! Don't go in there!"

"Why the hell no—ahh! God!"

Bella was off me in an instant.

Her small hands were covering her mouth, her shameful gaze locked on mine with a fierce determination.

Both Emmett and Alice stood in the doorway—the latter looking apologetic and Emmett looking incredibly amused.

Then, her words lighter than a summer breeze, Bella whispered. "I…I shouldn't have done that."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

_Oh, god. What have I done? _

I took two more steps backwards, each one of my muscle's tensing with the shear amount of stress hat had enveloped the room.

Or, perhaps, stress had just enveloped me.

In front of me, his large muscles looking odd in comparison to the wide smirk plastered across his face, was Emmett. His eyes seemed to dart excitedly between Edward and I, growing more amused by the second.

Alice—n the exact opposite as I had even seen before—looked thoroughly worried. Her eyes were wide with anxiousness, but trained intensely on Edward. She looked almost as if she were talking to him, though neither of them moved an inch.

But I barley recognized Alice and Emmett.

They were less than the smallest blimp on my radar.

I couldn't take my eyes off Edward.

His glorious, lean from was still laying on the floor where I had knocked him, supported upwards by the palms of his hands. His hair—normally in attractive disarray—was completely disheveled where my hands had pulled and scratched like a mad woman. The top two buttons of his shirt had been undone, but I couldn't remember having done that for the life of me. His topaz eyes held more intensity than I had ever seen before, and for Edward, that was quite an accomplishment. But, underneath the staggering intensity of his golden gaze was a thick layer of fire. It smoldered in his orbs, drawing me into to him. I sucked in deep, unnecessary breaths, panting from the pleasant flames burning through my empty veins.

I tried to move backwards, but my limbs were frozen, as if I were a paralyzed mouse, caught in the eyes of a snake.

No one in the room move for several seconds, and both Edward's and my eyes stayed connected. It felt like entire weight of the universe was holding our gazes together.

Finally, our spell was broken.

Carlisle entered through the door, a large medical text-book in his pale hands, and he too frozen from the solidified tension.

He focuses most on Edward's stretched out body on the ground. After a moment, he asked, his voice unnaturally calm, "Is everything alright?"

As soon as the bubble silence around us had been popped, I bolted out of the French doors. Unshedable tears were building up in my eyes. I was about to touch the foot of the stairs when a strong hand gripped my wrist.

I froze again, though I reused to look back.

I knew, from the electricity ripping through my body, who had grabbed me.

His vice called to me, just as hypnotic as his voice.

"Please, Bella," he begged. "Can I just—would it be unbelievably rude to ask—can we talk? Please?"

I had never heard Edward struggle so much for words before. He seemed too perfect.

I wanted to say yes—so much, with my whole heart—but I knew I couldn't.

If we talked, I would end up telling Edward how much I cared for him, and then he would feel like I was his burden to hold up. He was such a good person, and the last thing I wanted was to make him feel guilty.

Especially since I loved him.

_I loved him. _

My grip on the banister tightened and—as if I were no more than a clumsy human—I fell on the step I stood on, my back hitting the railing.

"Bella?" Edward asked, slightly shocked. His voice was coated with concern.

My mind was deep in a half euphoric, half horrific haze, and I was unable to answer him.

"Love…" I whispered the word to myself, tasting the flavor on my tongue. It was not one I had known in so long and yet, strangely, it was so very familiar.

I had to look at Edward now, his mind-numbingly beautiful face irresistibly close to mine.

"Love." I said again, matching the emotion with his face. I let the feeling settle around me, making a home in every dead cell of my body.

It fit.

"Love." I stated one last time, though it was no longer to get the feel of the word. I knew what it felt like and who I felt it for.

Then, just because I had to hear the way the entire sentence sounded together, as I sat in front of Edward, I whispered, "I love you."

His straight, perfectly chiseled jaw dropped. "What?" he whispered in a shocked, velvet voice.

He was unhappy.

He didn't want me to feel this way about him.

"I'm sorry," I apologized quickly. My words came out fast then, rushed. I needed him to hear this before he walked away—before he found being near me uncomfortable ad unpleasant. "I know I shouldn't feel this way. After everything your family has done for me—afterall_ you_ have done for me—but I just…" My sentence trailed off as I searched desperately for the right way to say what he needed to hear. "I've never felt this way before. You just…_brighten me_. I can't even describe it properly, Edward," his name burned in my throat, somehow traveling rapidly down to my dead heart. "It's like I was numb, and all of a sudden I'm feeling everything at once—pain, hope, sadness, joy, _love."_

But I know you don't want to hear this from me, so I promise I won't bring it up again. And, if it would be best for you, I can leave. In fact, I should leave, I just made your life unnecessarily complicated." I turned to look at him one last time, memorizing his perfect face, just so I could remember it for the rest of my existence. I knew, no matter how illogical it was, I would always love this Greek god of a man.

I would forever be lonely. Forever in pain.

I made my way passed Edward, heading for the front door. I had to get out of here as fast as I could—faster than that. It hurt so much just to be in the same room with him, knowing that he could never feel as I do.

But before I could even take three steps in the opposite direction, his strong, yet gentle hand gripped my forearm softly. I turned back to see the deepest form of despair molded onto his perfect features. I took a step closer, unable to help myself.

Edward shouldn't be in any pain. There had to be something I could do to help him.

"Don't go."

I blinked.

I had seen his mouth move along with the words, heard the sound pour from his magical mouth, and yet I didn't understand.

"What?" I whispered back, subconsciously leaning in closer to him.

Edward repeated himself slowly, his soft hands moving up my arms to slip over my shoulders. I held back a shiver at the sensation of his skin.

His eyes bored into mine with a staggering furiousness.

"Don't go." His hand traveled slowly to cradle my face. He held me as gently as if I were made of glass, and yet we both knew I was stronger than steel. "I…I never need anything in my life before, Bella, never." I loved the way his velvet-honey voice melted around my nickname. With him, I wasn't Isabella, the quite stupid girl.

I was so much.

I was _Bella_. Beautiful, kind, smart.

For the first time in each life, this was the first time I had ever stopped feeling like what a person should be, and started _being_ a person.

"But I need _you_. I need you more than anything else." He seemed to be choking on his words, lodging them deep in his throat. He bent his head close, leaning his forehead softly against mine.

"I love you. I love you more than anything I've ever known."

I gasped, but the breath didn't have time to reach my mouth before Edward had graceful covered my lips with his.

This kiss—my second, to be exact—was nothing like the last one.

It wasn't rough or harsh; there was no layer of desperation in the heated passion. This was not a forest fire, devouring everything in sight.

This kiss was the slow burning of a match, beginning at the tip and traveling down, only destroying what was needed.

Kissed back a best as I knew how, moving my lips against his as instinct dictated.

Slowly—always nervous o his reaction—I slide my small hands up into his hair, forcing his lips closer to mine.

Suddenly, almost frighteningly so, he pulled back. He breathed a deep, frustrated sigh. I flinched. Was I that horrendous?

"I'm sorry," he apologized, he said, a small smile on his face. "As much as I would like to continue this conversation, I would rather us do it alone." He jerked his head side ways, muttering, "My family—one or two in particular—are making some mental comments I wouldn't like to have in my head at the moment." He pulled away from me, but took my head in his, threading our fingers together. "Would you mind if we spoke alone, in private?"

I nodded, following him outside.

He didn't speak again as he me along at a reasonable pace. We ran for a few minutes—making sure we cleared his mental rage of the house, I was sure—before he suddenly stopped, leaning against a tree.

I sat in one fluid motion, folding my legs underneath me.

He chuckled and copied my actions, keeping his back against the rough bark. He took both of my hands in one of his, stroking my skin with his smooth finger tips.

"I know I've said it before, but well…" the grin that grew upon his face was bright enough to blind the sun, and just as dazzling.

"I love you."

I grinned back, the muscles in my mouth feeling odd twisted in such a matter.

"I love you, too."

Edward laughed, louder and more joyous than I'd ever heard before. Soon, I joined him.

After our united glee and sobered, I asked the one question flooding my thoughts.

"Why?" I asked. "I'm not fishing for compliments or anything, but how can you…_feel that way_ when you know what I…after I told you…?" My voice trailed off at the end, too weak to finish.

Edward didn't say anything for so long that I began to worry. Then, almost inaudibly, he whispered, "I killed people, Bella." His eyes wouldn't meet mine. "A few years after I was changed I began to think I was…above Carlisle's views. Better than them—and him—in a way. I realize now that I was a young, arrogant fool, of course, and I would never repeat such a mistake. I thought that if I only killed the…_monsters_ of the human world, I would remain above a monster myself. I was wrong, and I soon began to see that in my scarlet eyes."

Slowly, as if a were only a mere mortal, I traced the outline of my right red eye. "Monster…" I repeated. I was a monster. Horrible, evil.

I didn't deserve Edward.

He snatched my hand away quickly, taking it back in his while shaking his head rapidly. "No, Bella, I never meant that. You didn't know there was any other way. And even I you did feed…more traditionally, I don't think you could ever be less than an angel."

If I could have blushed, I would have been redder than my eyes.

"Edward?" I whispered to him, leaning in slightly.

"Yes?" he asked, copying my actions.

I laughed lightly. "I just wanted to say your name."

He chuckled to and leaned even closer—our lips were less than a torturous inch apart. "Bella," he said in an almost reverant tone.

And we kissed.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

It's often been said that my kind is easily distracted. For the most part, I agree with this statement. A vampire sense are so strong—so powerful—that it is difficult to focus on one thing at a time, especially at a young age.

But nothing, not even a meteor shower bombing the surface of Earth, could distract me from the wonder that is Bella. The truly amazingthing , to my mind, at least, was that the beautiful goddess didn't have any clue what she did to me.

At the moment, for example, we were both lounging lazily on the couch, Bella's head propped up against my lap. I sat, pretending to watch the idiotic football game Emmett had insisted on putting on, even if he wasn't here to watch it, stroking Bella's chestnut locks.

I could care less about the inconsequential game on television. Right now, I was far too concerned with every move Bella made as she read.

The way she scrunched her nose when she came across a line she didn't like.

How she turn her head to the side when something captured her attention.

How she would lick the edge of her fingertips before grabbing the corner of a page.

Every small, insignificant little thing Bella did entranced me.

I had tried , honestly, to let Bella be as she read. I didn't want to be a disturbance. Finally, I couldn't take the silence any longer. Twisting a strand of Bella's dark hair gently around my fingertips, I leaned in close to her, whispering in her ear.

"Enjoying the book?"

I saw her fragile fingers freeze on the paper surface of the book, her breath hitching slightly as my lips brushed lightly against her ear. I couldn't help the smug smile that began to spread over my face. It was nice to know, though I had never been with anyone like this before, I still managed to please Bella, even in the small ways.

"Very much," I heard a bell-like, husky tone answer at last. She cleared her throat unnecessarily, turning her beautiful eyes—now almost all gold, flecks of red barely lingering after two weeks of vigorous hunting—towards me. "I've never read anything like it. Thank you," she smiled at me warmly.

I smiled again, bending closer towards her.

I trailed my lips over her jaw, down her neck. Her breathing spiked again before picking back up at rapid speeds. I had traveled the route twice before I reached her ear, stopping to whisper again, "My pleasure."

I felt her body shiver against mine.

I wanted—_desperately—_to continue in this direction; to pull Bella up into my arms and lead her upstairs. To push my kisses downwards further and further until she moaned in pleasure. To hear her call out my name as….

But I had to stop.

Bella and I had been moving slowly, and I didn't want to pressure into doing anything she wasn't comfortable with.

That was the last thing I wanted.

I pulled back.

Bella's eyes had fluttered shut, her mouth slightly a opened.

I began the conversation again, trying to ease some of the tension between us before I did something stupid. That dazed look on her face was making me think some very inappropriate things….

"We have more of hers, you know," I nodded my head absently to the book in her lap. "They're Jasper's, I think."

Her eyebrows shifted upwards, showing surprise. I gave her a curious look she understood at once. "I just didn't think romance novels were…Jasper's cup of tea…so to speak."

I laughed, my body shaking hers. "They're not," I informed Bella with a grin, moving both of us so she lay entirely across me, I rested my chin on her head "When Jasper reads things with a lot of emotional context—just like this," I touched her book with a light fingertip, "He does it for analyzing purposes. He tries to understand how people feel, through the way they're written. It's one of the few times being in someone's mind is truly interesting to me." Another time, of course, was when Carlisle theorized.

I could only imagine how fascinating hearing Bella's mind would be.

"Emmett still teases Jasper about it from time to time." I finished at last.

Bella's eyebrows came together, scrunching in the middle from her confusion. I smoothed out the dent with my thumb, the rest of my finger stroking her cheeks as I did so. "Why does Emmett teased him?" she wondered aloud.

I grinned. "Emmett teases everyone about everything."

Her smile matched mine, the curiosity sparking in her eyes. "Like what?"

"He teases Alice about her size—and shopping habits. Jasper about his, understandably, high emotionial climate. Carlisle is _constantly_ mocked about his accent—"

"Accent?"

A small chuckle escaped my lips. "British."

Her eyes grew wide for a second, and she immediately broke out into a small fit of giggles. "What?" I asked before I could stop myself.

Her giggling—already a little hysterical—slowly died down. She gave me a large grin and my dead heart seemed to beat again just for a moment. "He's British." She said again shaking her head incredulously. "I was born—and raised, for the most part—in colonial Virginia during the revolutionary war. There was a time in my life I would have spit in any English man's face just for speaking to me. And now, here I am, living in one's house voluntarily. I just think it's humorously ironic, that's all."

"You were a patriot?" Somehow, this thought made me chuckle. Just imagining little Bella riled up and angry, spitting in a grown man's face seemed more than a little amusing.

"One of the biggest." A large grin from her gorgeous pink lips, full and perfectly kissable, "Though I was nothing compared to my bother, Garrett. He was fifteen the last time I saw him. He would be the first one at the rallies, and probably the last one who was able to let go of his sour feelings towards England after the war. He was stubborn."

"It must have run in the family."

Her eyes flashed up to mine, her mouth turned into a playful frown. In quite a childish manner, she stuck her tongue out at me. Then, a kind and warm smile took back over features. "You never told me what Emmett teased _you_ about."

"About the fact that he's the biggest prude known to man. Before you came along, Bells, I was seriously starting to question his sexual preference."

My older brother walked into the room, a football held in his large hands and a mischievous smirk over his face.

I growled lowly at him, but otherwise gave no reaction to his immature mocking.

I heard him mentally complain that he was disappointed from my lack of reaction, and he quickly came up with a plan. Throwing the ball with all his might, he aimed directly at my head.

I, of course, caught the ball easily with one hand, not even having to shift Bella's position on top of me.

I gently laid the ball on Bella's lap, running a hand smoothly through her hair, before turning back to Emmett. "Nice try," I offered.

He frowned at me. "Shut up, Ed."

I sighed deeply, my smug gaze molding into a furious glare. "Ed-ward." I said, accentuating each syllable. "Not Ed. Or Eddie. Or anything else you can think of. My name _is Edward_."

He snorted deeply, turning his back towards me. He was planning on going off to find Rosalie. "Whatever, Edwina."

Neither of us saw Bella throw the ball before it hit the back of his head.

When we looked back at my love, she was sitting up, turned in his direction, with her hands covering her mouth, her eyes wide in shock. I could tell, by the set of her cheek bones, that she was hiding a wide grin.

Emmett grinned too, crouching down in a hunting position.

"Oh, you're gonna get it now," he told her.

Bella laughed once, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before bolting off, her colors becoming a burr even to my eyes.

Emmett took off after her.

I sat up, grinning as I heard her wondrous laugh echo throughout the house.

Jasper and Carlisle both finally seemed to hear the raucous of noise and each came out of the library, wearing almost identical expressions of curiosity and amusement.

"Emmett again?" Jasper asked, raising an eyebrow in question.

I nodded," And Bella." I heard a loud crash followed by two loud laughs.

Carlisle smiled. He walked over to the couch, sitting beside me. _She seems to be settling in well_, he noted.

I nodded.

His hand touched my shoulder in a kind, fatherly way. _I'm happy for you_, he thought at me.

I smiled in thanks.

Suddenly, I heard Bella call my name, her voice layered thickly with giggles. "Edward!" she called, "Save me!"

She raced into the room just as I stood up, throwing herself into my arms. A beautiful smile graced her lips.

I winked at her, pushing her behind me. Just as Emmett rounded the corner I jumped out, knocking him over and sending us flying onto the floor in the kitchen. The kitchen door was knocked over in our match, flying off the hinges.

Emmett laughed pushing me of him. I quickly got to my feet, waiting as he did the same.

We began to circle each other, playful growling every few minutes. The second Emmett tensed his muscles, preparing to spring, a new arrival came into the kitchen.

Esme ran in, her face holding pure fury and shock. Both my brother and I straightened our positions at once, our expressions growing sheepish.

"Boys!" She said after a moment of mental shock. _I can't believe it! My door! _"How dare you…acting like children…I…I…Fix this door _right now!_ We'll have guests in less than ten moments and I don't want them to think you were raised by wolves!"

Esme rarely yelled at any of us, and when it happened, everyone—Emmett included—took it deathly serious.

We both nodded, Emmett reaching down to replace the door within it's hinges. It sat at an awkward angle. Esme's nostrils flared with hell's fury.

"I…" Bella stepped in, her face concerned and ashamed. "I'm so sorry, Esme. I started this and I really—"

Esme softened at once, a small smile melting her ridged features. "It's not your fault Bella," she spoke kindly, "This isn't the first time I've had to put my house back together." A sharp glare at Emmett and I. "But it _will_ be the last."

Alice danced into the situation then, mentally laughing at my metaphorical spanking. _Perfect little Edward gets yelled at_, she mused in my direction. _I love what Bella has done to you_.

I sighed, but otherwise ignored her.

Truthfully, I love what Bella had done to me as well.

"What visitors?" I asked after a moment of dead silence.

"Tanya and the family. They heard we have a new member, " An excited smile in the direction of my mate, "And they want to met her."

Bella looked utterly terrified.

I'm sure I didn't fair much better.

Tanya was coming.

Emmett's thoughts on the situation summed up my feelings perfectly. _Well, this should be interesting. _

Interesting indeed.


	13. Chapter 13

**This chapter, hopefully, starts to get a little hot. Should I change the rating, because there is a good chance I'll continue moving in this direction? Please post you opinions!**

**Also. Thank you so much for all of the reviews! Honestly, I only started writing this because it wouldn't stop pestering me. I never expected such a good response. So thank you sincerely. You have no idea how much it means to me. **

**On the same note, I would LOVE it if you would give me some ideas on what you think of my two one shots **_**And Here He Comes **_**and **_**And There She Is.**_** I'm not sure if I should continue with them for a full story or move on to another one after I finish **_**The Gold Mine**_**. **

**Thanks for everything, **

**--Bookworm**

Chapter 13

I paced back and forth, traveling repeatedly from Edward's massive shelves of CDs to his bathroom and back. My small hands were fisted tightly in my hair, threatening to rip the strands out. As soon as my grip would grow too strong on my hair, I would move them to my T-shirt, and vice-versa.

I was a wreck.

Tanya and the rest of the Denali clan would be here in less than six minutes.

I would have to met Edward's extended family. But, worse than that, I would have to face the beautiful goddess that once had—and still probably did—have her eyes set on Edward.

It's not like I could blame her in the slightest.

Who wouldn't be interested in Edward?

Besides his unearthly beauty, he also was passionate, kind, intelligent, and one of the most…_decent_ of people I had ever met.

And I was just me; monstrous, murderer Isabella with no talents whatsoever. How was I ever going to compete?

My hands fisted in my brown locks again.

I felt Edward's hands slip gently over my own, pulling them carefully out of my head.

"It'll be fine, Bella," he told me, his lips temptingly close to my ear. "They'll love you."

I snorted in a very unladylike manor. "Doubtful." I muttered, playing with the hem of my t-shirt.

Hi strong arm traveled up from my arms, gripping my shoulders tightly before using them as leverage to spin my around, so we were facing each other.

Then, as I always hoped he would, he crashed his lips to mine with staggering intensity. My arms—of their own accord—wrapped solidly around his neck, pulling him close to me. My mouth open widely, the longing to taste him. He copied my actions at once, pushing his soft lips against mine with a ferocious hunger. My eyes had long since closed, and yet all of my other sense were more than enough to experience what Edward was doing for me.

I felt his soft hands crawl up my neck, caressing the satin skin there, as he pulled me toward him. I couldn't seem to get close enough to him—he was much too tall.

Frustration seems to grow within both of us simultaneously.

At the same moment I jumped up, he grabbed my legs, wrapping them sensually around his waist. I could feel our bodies pressed against each other's in the most delicious of ways.

I moaned into his mouth. My reaction caused him to moved his mouth harder against mine—more demanding.

Hadn't realized Edward was moving until he was leaning down, pushing me onto the bed.

Finally, after minutes of no separation, our mouths parted.

Both of our breathing was laborious and heavy, practically panting.

I looked into his topaz eyes, swimming in the seas of gold. He looked right back and the intensity in his expression undid any doubt.

I pull him back down to connect with my lips, trying to show him the hunger I felt.

Softly, almost so I didn't hear it, a moan escaped slowly his lips.

Before I could register the movement, he was pressed on top of me, his firm hands traveling slowly up my legs while his mouth hastily ate mine.

I felt his touch reach the bottom of my shirt, moving underneath to rub my stomach with soft circles.

I grabbed a handful of his hair as he kissed me, needing something to anchor me to reality.

Quickly, he pulled away, his lips kissing at my neck as his hand began to push my shirt upwards. He seemed strangely clumsy. He was unable to removed the obnoxious layer of fabric.

Finally I heard him mumble an annoyed _"Damn it"._

Then he ripped the shirt of my body, the sound of tearing echoing through the room.

I didn't even have time to gasp before his mouth retook mine, licking my bottom lip to ask for permission.

His hand was moving slowly to my chest and I grew weak from anticipation.

I didn't know how much more of his I could take.

"Oh _god" _I moaned out against his mouth, unable to keep the passion from erupting out of my self.

Edward all but growled in response, his lips moving with a renewed fever.

"Bella! Edward!" A voice sound incredibly coarse compared to Edward's honey- music, called out, "There here!"

Edward was off me in an instance.

He lay beside me, panting and gasping as I did. If I were human, I'd be sweating.

"Oops." He said at last, so quietly no one beneath our floor would be able hear us. "I think I acted a bit too exuberatly."

We both laughed quietly.

"I didn't mind in the slightest." I informed him with a sly smile over his face.

He groaned softly again.

"Don't tease me."

I laughed again.

He sat up on the bed, resting I head in his hand for a few seconds. Finally, he turned back to me.

His eyes were sympathetic, loving and concerned.

"You don't have to meet them if you don't want to, love," his hand cup my cheek and I leaned into his touch, "But they're all excited to greet you."

He stood, heading toward the door.

Before he opens it, he turned back toward me. "Alice wants me to tell you that your dress I in the second drawer down. I'll be waiting, love."

He left.

I wait for almost a full two minutes before sighing and surrendering.

Edward knew exactly how to play me.

I sighed again, moving to Edward' dresser. I look in the second to last drawer, pulling out a neatly folded square of thick cotton fabric. I open up the dress, examining the material.

It is a black and white floral pattern, the waist line up high and tied with a little bow. It lands at knee length, and has no straps.

I feel like blushing by just looking at it.

Its so…_pretty_.

I look back in the drawer, a black pair of heel sitting there innocently.

I giggle slightly.

Alice will be Alice.

I put on the outfit quickly, looking at myself in the mirror.

The image I saw of myself was different from any other reflection over the last two hundred years.

The girl in the mirror was lovely.

She had long chestnut locks and unnaturally pale skin. Her golden eyes sparkled and a hint of a mile could be seen at the corner of her mouth.

The main difference though wasn't the pretty dress show wore.

Or even the innocent color of her eyes.

The real change wasn't how she looked—but it was actually _her_.

She looked happy. Truly and perfectly happy.

"BELLA!" I heard Emmett's loud voice call up to me. "You're pretty enough already, get your cute little ass down here! The family wants to meet you!"

I took a deep breath before exiting the door, heading down the stairs.

The sight I found when I reached the bottom was something to behold.

The entire Cullen clan was there, of course. Esme and Carlisle were deep in conversation with a dark haired man and woman who were clasping hands. Rosalie and Jasper were off to the side, whispering in hushed tones. The looked like they were planning something troublesome. I noted mentally to keep an eye on them.

Both Alice and Rosalie were speaking happily with two blonde hair beauties, and a brown haired male. One of the two women—who could easily be sisters—had her arms wrapped around the male, her head resting on his shoulder. She had a kind, adventurous face. He smiled easily and laughed even easier. The other woman looked icy and cold. Her features were sharp and angular. Pointed. Almost frightening.

But, at the moment, I couldn't even focus on them.

Near the front door stood a woman whose beauty could easily rival Rosalie's. She had shorter, curlier hair the color of sunset. Golden eyes set off her look gorgeously.

She stood next to an uncomfortable looking Edward, her hand placed lightly on his as she leaned forward, pressing her form close to him. Her smile was sly and sensual.

Tanya.

How could I compete with _her_?

Dispair threaten to over take me--I might have choked on it.

Carlisle noticed me first.

He smiled warmly at me, taking a step forward in my direction.

"Bella," he greeted me with a fatherly tone, "Come down. We've all been eager for you to join us."

As soon Edward heard my name, his eyes snapped up to meet mine and his signature crooked grin took over his magnificent face.

I was nervous about broadcasting our relationship this soon with Tanya here, but Edward seemed to have different ideas.

He walked over to me, taking my hand and pulling me down the steps, up into his arms. His lips kissed mine softly before he pulled away, still smiling.

I looked down, embarrassed.

"Bella," Edward said, leading me forward into the room. "I'd like to introduce you to our…cousins…of sort." He lead me over to the dark haired couple by Esme. "This is Carmen and Eleazar." They each had a soft, Hispanic features. The man—Eleazar—gave me strange, frustrated look. Almost like Edward look when he couldn't read my mind. It made me self-conscious. Carmen smiled warmly at me. She reminded me a little of Esme.

Before I could finish greeting the olive skinned couple, a head of strawberry blonde hair bounced over to me.

The entire room—myself included—tensed. Edward's hand clamped around mine with anxious force.

"Hello, Bella," Tanya said to me, her smile warm and genuine.

She didn't hate me.

I released a huff of nervous air.

She came forward and wrapped her arms around me, hugging me gently. "It is so nice to meet you." She pulled back and placed her hands on my shoulders, glancing at Edward. "I'm so happy for you." She told him. Then, back at me, "Both of you."

Her smile was sad.

She wasn't upset about me being with Edward.

She was so lonely. It made me grieve for her. I knew what it was like to be lonely.

"Well Tanya," the icy blonde said in a monotonous voice, "I guess we're the last ones left, huh?"

Tanya smiled joylessly and said nothing, moving aide to stand next to the kind blonde woman next to the brown haired man.

That when we saw each other.

I knew him.

I knew that I _knew_ him.

I dropped Edward's hand and took a step forward.

He dropped his mate's and did the same.

"Bella." He said carefully. "Bella?"

I took in his features, trying to figure out where I knew him from. He looked so familiar…as if I had seen him in a dream… a far away dream…

"Isa…bella?" he asked hesitantly. Then, with slightly more confidence. "Isabella Swan?"

I nodded carefully.

Suddenly, he was right next to me, grasping my shoulders in a firm grip. He looked down at me, his eye looking expectant. I felt a jolt of electicity spark between us.

"Isabella Marie Swan born September 27, 1762? You were born to Renee and Charlie Swan in Queen Burg, Virginia." Hi voice grew more sure. "You read everything in sight. You can't stand attention. You had a little sister named Sarah."

I felt Edward' frantic hand grab my arm, trying to pull me away from this mysterious stranger. I wouldn't budge.

"How do you…how do you know all this?" _I_ barely knew all this!

Then, staring into his eyes, I realized I was actually staring into my own.

I gasped.

One of my fingers reached up, caressing the skin underneath hi right eye.

I knew. I knew him.

"Garrett." I said slowly.

Garrett. My brother.

If I could pass out, I would have been sprawled on the floor.

A it was, my knees gave out underneath me.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

As soon I saw Bella's knees begin to fold, I had rushed forward, encasing her in my stone arms before anyone else could move an inch.

The other man had moved forward as well—trying to catch her.

Garrett.

Now, I'll admit I am not very well acquainted with Garrett. He joined Tanya's coven about two decades ago, when Kate happened to run into him in a snowy Alaskan forest.

Kate's snarky, independent personality seemed to match perfectly with Garrett's adventurous nature.

I knew Alice and Esme found Garrett to be a kind and enjoyable presence. Emmett often said he was one of the individuals it was most the fight a round or too with. Even stoic Jasper had taken a certain liking to him. They were both southern military men—though their wars were more than a century apart.

But as soon as he began thinking of Bella as his "_Issy"_ I didn't give a damn if the entire world loved him.

Bella. Was. Mine.

When vampire's mated. They did so for life. There was no compromising—at least, not for me.

Through Garrett's mind I kept seeing pictures of Bella—each one colored with layers of longing.

He had missed her. The bastard.

I crouched lowly, pushing Bella behind me.

"Garrett?" I heard Kate say, her voice holding surprising amounts of pain.

Garrett turned back to his ate. He saw her anguished expression and shook his head. Then, his eyes turning back to meet Bella's, he whispered.

"Isabella's my sister."

Shock carried throughout the room. I, however, was hit hardest of them all.

_Sister. _

I simply couldn't wrap my mind around the concept—it was like the word was caving in on my, suffocating my airless lungs.

Then, almost as if she were whispering in my mind, I could hear Bella's words repeat themselves.

_My younger brother Garrett…_ _He was fifteen the last time I saw him…_

He was her brother.

"Please, Edward," her voice sounded in my ear. It was real this time, not a memory. My grip on her hand tightened.

Now that she had her brother to protect her, would she go with him? Leave me?

She _couldn't._

"He won't hurt me," she promise. "Let me go to him."

She wanted him—her brother—more than me.

The pain ripped through myself crushing my form into pieces.

_ Edward,_ Jasper called to me in his mind. He could feel my anguish beaming off me—he could empathize with the way I drowned in it. _Calm down. Your grip is going to hurt her. _

I looked back to see my hand clutched tightly around Bella's in my attempt to keep her with me.

I was selfish.

I needed Bella so much. Would I stoop so low as to hurt her so I could have her?

Even if she didn't want me?

_No._

I was not Bella's master, and she certainly wasn't my slave. If she wanted to leave, I wouldn't want to—or have the right to—ask her to stay with me.

It was her choice. All her choice.

Forcing myself to let her go, I quickly dropped her small hand and moved away, walking briskly up the stairs to my room.

I needed to be alone.

I could see my stoic and emotionless face in each the other's eyes—except for Bella's , of course.

Once reaching my room, I all but slammed the door, closed my eyes and laid down on the small couch. Crossing my arms over my eyes, I tried to block out the thoughts below me.

However, just as usual, my efforts were futile.

_Oh, he looked so upset…._

_ Man, mood swings again…_

_ This must be such a shock for Garrett…_

_ Finding your sibling after so long…_

_ Now that I think about it, they do look very similar…something in the eyes…_

_ ….Wow, poor Edward…._

_ Edward? I'm coming up._

The last thought caught my attention at once.

Tanya.

A small knock sounded at my door.

Her small head of curly strawberry blonde hair popped in, her golden eyes looking sympathetic and concerned. _Can I come in?_

"No." I mumbled, childishly turning my head away from her.

She walked in and set on the floor beside me.

"Edward." She greeted. I ignored her presence. She sighed, annoyed, and her mental thoughts turned towards Russian mumbling.

"Please leave me alone." I ask, though it left my mouth sounding like a command.

She ignored my comment.

"You love her." She stated it, no question in her musical tone.

"Absolutely."

Her smile was weak and saddened, but it was there. "She must be something to snag you," she joked half-heartedly, _I know I never could._

I sat up at once, alarmed. I knew Tanya had had…certain types of affections for me, but I wouldn't have thought me finding a mate would have caused her such grief.

"Tanya," I said quietly, hesitantly. How do I ease her suffering? "I never meant to…"

She waved her hand dismissively. _You don't understand,_ she told me with melancholy humor. "It wasn't _you_ in particular, Edward." She smiled at me. "It was the premise of not being alone. I've always been alone."

I knelt down on the ground beside her. I place a comforting hand on her shoulder. "It will happen for you one day, Tanya." I pointed a hand towards my chest. "I was alone to, thinking I was complete within myself, before Bella showed up. There's someone out there for you, I swear it."

She shook her head again. Her eyes looked as if she were human, tears would be falling from her thin golden eyes.

"There's a hole inside me, Edward. A deep one. And if it hasn't filled itself after a thousand years, it's not going to be filled anytime soon. You've found your Bella, Kate's found her Garret. I'm starting to feel like the lonely animal on the ark."

I attempted to lighten the mood. "If it makes you feel any better, Tanya, I have a feeling I may be losing my partner as well. Now that she has family…"

Tanya snorted. Edward, for such a smart person, sometimes you can be such an _Idiot_." I blinked surprised at the translation. Tanya was always one for bluntness. She could rival Emmett at the best days, and Rosalie at her worst. She placed her hand small place hand on my knee. "Edward, I swear I've never seen someone look at you the way Bella did."

I was confused. "But I behaved horribly." I pointed out.

She laughed again rolling her eyes and giving me a slight smack on the back of my head.

"You could threaten to kill Garrett and I have a feeling part of Bella would still love you."

I laughed too and stood up. "I should probably go apologies. I acted like a spoiled child."

Tanya nodded again. "You did." She agreed easily.

I she stood too and we gave a friendly embrace before opening the door, and walking downstairs.

As we approached the bottom, I prepared myself for my family responses.

I deserved whatever they said to m, of course. And I defiantly deserved hard beating from Bella.

That is, if she even wanted to be in my presence at all.

I looked over toward the couch—listening as Tanya told me she would be in the kitchen with Alice and Kate—and saw plenty a sight for sore eyes. Bella's face, smiling joyfully at Garrett. They were laughing together as he ruffled her hair playfully. They was love in both of their gazes.

"Bella," I whispered, taking a small step forward.

Both of their gazes flickered to mine.

Garrett's gaze were hard and angry.. He was quite upset with me for upsetting Bella.

I couldn't disagree.

But it was my loves eyes that I focused most one.

Her expression was one of pain and hurt. I did that to her.

Garrett made her laugh, while I gave her pain.

"Edward," she said back in the same tone. Then, biting her lips I that way she often did, she offered, "Would you like to sit?"

She wanted me next to her! My heart soared with hope.

I nodded hesitantly, stepping forward, to sit beside Bella. I made sure to avoid contact, not positive she wanted me to touch her.

She grasped my hand tightly in hers.

I exulted again.

"Edward," Garrett greeting icily.

I nodded back, saying nothing.

He turned back to Bella as though I had not spoken.

"So, Issy," I cringed slightly at the nickname. My mate—_mine _—wasn't Isabella or Issy or any other damned thing. She was perfect as just _Bella_—just beautiful. "Out never did tell me how you ended up with the Cullens."

Bella grew nervous It was no secret that Bella was ashamed about her time with James's Coven. I told her that we all had past—some far worst than hers—but the sadness never seem to leave her eyes when that time was mentioned.

I used to belong to this…other coven," Bella said carefully, "And we ran into the Cullens. I preferred this lifestyle, and I stayed."

Then, with a small smile in my direction, she added on, "Plus, I had certain incentives to stay," her hand moved upward, running softly through my hair. I felt like purring from the sensation.

I grabbed her hand, bring it to my mouth so I could kiss her palm. "You certainly did," I told her with a apologetic smile.

Her sweet gaze was completely forgiving.

She turned back to her brother. "And here we are."

His mind barely registered Bella's last words. He was too consumed with protective rage to focus on anything else but controlling his cold glare.

Then, he began to speak to me.

_I know you can hear me,_ he started. I nodded. _I just wanted to warn you—from brother to…boyfriend—that if I ever see you treat Bella like you just did, I will personally put you in so much pain you'll be begging for death. _His gaze flickered to his sister, observing her loving eyes that were looking up at me and he mentally sighed. _I just got her back, so I damn sure don't like sharing her, but…she _does _seem to care for you. _Again, her made direct contact with me. _But If you hurt her, I hurt you. Got it?_ He raised a dark eyebrow in question.

I deserved his hostility and distrust. I nodded once.

"You're doing that thing again, aren't you?" Bella interrupted, her golden eyes flickering from Garrett to me and back again. "When you have those silent conversations?"

I nodded while smiling sheepishly.

Garrett seemed to have lost all playfulness. _I'll have to tell her sometime…_he decided mentally.

"Issy," he said slowly, scooting closer to Bella. In his mind, I couldn't tell what news he was about to tell her. I did however, know it wasn't gong to be good.

I brought my hand to her shoulder, rubbing soothing circles into the bare skin.

Garrett grabbed Bella's hand. "There's something I have to…you have to…"

He took a deep breath. "Its about Sarah…you _do _remember_—_"

"I remember Sarah." Bella responded with a quivering, half broken voice. She looked as fragile as she had that first day I met her cowering behind her coven-mates forms.

"Well," Garrett spoke hesitantly. "A few days after you…went missing…I found Sarah in the barn. I was out in the search party—looking for you—and when I came back she was…" _oh, god, how do I tell her?_

Bella bolted off of the couch, her finger tips leaving mine and flying into her thick locks of hair. "She was dead, right?" she aimed at Garrett, her tone turning into self hatred anguish.

"I know she was. Because I…I…I found. Three days after I was changed, I saw her in the barn."

Garrett tensed.

"I…I killed her, Garrett." She let out a dry sob. "I killed our sister." Bella couldn't look at either one of us. I stood up, walking towards her. She flinched in response. I paused. "I understand if you don't want to…see me anymore,, brother," she told Garrett. "I..I still hate myself for it. I'll understand if you do to."

Garrett smiled softly. "I could never hate you, Issy."

I moved forward, wrapping my arms carefully around Bella. "No one could hate you." Bella sniffed once, tilting her head to gaze up at me with a sincere expression. I melted.

"I love you," she said softly, kissing my jaw line. Then. Looking back at Garrett. She smiled. "I love you both."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Life for the last two months had been better than I have even had the right to imagine. I finally felt—after over two hundred years—that I was somewhere I belonged. I was no longer the clumsy (as Garrett reminded me) human girl who ran the local farm and read too much. Or the inconvenient, silent immortal without any talents whatsoever.

Now, here, with the people I loved, I _meant _something.

And, as I recently discovered, I was anything but talentless.

After the situation with Garrett had calmed down a bit and both family's were finally able to come together again, Eleazar had explained his frustrated expression. His gift for sensing the talents of other was stooped by me. I had assumed that meant I was simply gift less, but it turned out to be the exact opposite. I had a gift that _blocked_ his—blocked all mental abilities. Like Edward's mind reading, Eleazar's gift made it seem like I wasn't there at all. It had taken all of my family member's a few minutes to make me truly understand the significance of this gift. Kate couldn't sting me, Jane couldn't hurt me, Aro couldn't read me.

Garrett had teasingly call me their "secret weapon".

Edward had been beside his self with pride for me. His had picked me up, spinning me joyfully around in his arms, bending me down to give me a kiss that was completely unsuitable for public viewing. Not that I had mined at the time, of course, but afterwards I was horribly mortified.

I had been most worried about Tanya's reaction, but when I had looked over, she was smiling, the only hint of sadness in her tawny orbs.

I knew how it felt to be all alone, and I empathized..

I was surprised however, by Garrett's reaction. He had sneered his upper lip, turning his head away in disgust. I was instantly confused—Garrett had a mate? Why would me having one also disturb him?

He barely spoke to me for the rest of the night.

I was heartbroken by this—are that I had somehow offended my brother only hours after getting him back, but when I was in the middle of berating myself, Edward explained the situation in the way only he could.

He told me that Garrett wasn't angry or upset with me in any way. He was saddened by the fact he had to share me. That he was feeling brotherly worry for me, and was just going to have to get used to me being an adult.

Edward had also said, his voice darkly amused, "I don't think your brother is very fond of me."

When I had asked why not, he had just chuckled and changed the subject.

The fact that the love of my life and my brother didn't get along was the only cloud looming over my perfect sky.

As much as I loved Garrett—had missed him since before I could remember—he was only a _part_ of my life. Edward _was_ my life.  
I would never again smile without him. Never again feel the happiness of joy. I would be empty with out him—even worse than I was before.

I could only dream I affected him as much as he affected me.

So, besides the small relationship struggles, my life couldn't have been better.

This , hopefully wouldn't have been any different.

Alice had already seen a killer storm crossing overhead, and Tanya had wanted to get the entire group together for a family baseball game.

"Alright," Alice had commanded, taking charge of the situation like she was known to do. "Teams are boys verses girls. Two women will need to sit out." I automatically went to raise my hand, but Alice interrupted quickly. "Not you, Bella." She gave a wicked smile, and I saw Edward frown from the corner of my eye.

"I'll sit out," Esme said at once, kissing Carlisle on the cheek and walking over past third base to sit in the snow. Carmen nodded and followed after her, and they began to chat happily.

"Guys bat first!" Alice sang out, skipping across the field to second base.

Everyone laughed lightly at her exuberance, Emmet and Garrett racing to the batters base. Jasper sighed, picking up a bat to follow behind the buffoons.

I turned in Edward's arms, clasping them around him. "I don't want to play against you," I told him, my words muffled by the fabric of his shirt.

"I don't want to either," he told me, running his nimble finger through my hair. "But one can never win against Alice—I would sooner fight a hurricane."

I laughed, trying to move backwards. Suddenly, I found myself lifted upwards, my face unbearable close from Edward's.

"Can't I have a parting gift?" he asked, his sweet breath blowing across my face. Then, his smile turning into an obvious smug smirk. "For good luck, perhaps?"

I narrowed my eyes at him, slipping one of my feet on his legs to use as leverage, "You think you're going to win, don't you?"

He laughed, his eyes glinting with mischievousness. "I may be a bit confident."

I pushed against him, causing Edward to fall to the ground while I stayed perfectly prim on the grass. He smile and stood up, rubbing the snow from his copper hair. I felt oddly cocky—almost arrogant. It was new for me, strange. I cast a quick glance in Jasper's direction, but he looked occupied with Carlisle.

I leaned in close to Edward, the tips of my lips barely brushing against his, before I whisper. "If you win, I'll give you a present."

Edward took a step forward, both of our hands behind our back. His chest was pressed against mine. He raised an eyebrow in question. "Will I get to unwrap this gift?"

I grinned slowly, remembering some particular undergarments Alice had forced me to get. "Absolutely. Lace and all."

His jaw dropped open slightly, his eyes widening just a bit. His cleared his throat uncomfortable, shifting his weight. "Lace?" his voice cracked—it was odd to hear. "I didn't think you had anything…_with lace._"

I smiled again—taunting him. "Nothing you've seen."

His smirk became incredibly tempting. "What if you _do_ when," he looked doubtful, "Do I still get to unwrap my gift?"

I smiled in mock sadness. "No, I'm afraid you won't. But if you're that confident in your skills, you won't even have to worry about that, right?"

He grinned, dazzling me with unearthly beauty. "Exactly."

"Come on, Bella!" Kate yelled, waving me over, "We need to strategize!"

I moved away from Edward, my laughter carrying with the wind.

I liked this new side of me—fun and adventurous. Confident.

"What was all that about?" Rosalie asked, arching an eyebrow playfully.

I smiled back. "Just making a bet." Then turning towards Alice, "Who wins?"

"Games don't work like that, Bella." The pixie said, tossing the baseball up fifty feet in the air and watching as it came back down again. "It all depends on what decisions we make while we play."

Then, glancing at the boys, "Speaking of which, we should be setting up. I pitch, rose plays second."

Tanya laughed. "I'll take third."

Irina. "I'll catch."

Kate "I guess I can cover first."

"So Bella will play outfield, then." Then, looking toward me with curiosity. "You can catch, right?"

"Yes," James fancied a game now and then. I had enough experience.

Alice nodded in appreciation, then ordered us to our stations. I giggled at her military like tone.

Garrett was up to bat first. He played smart, keeping the ball low and fat. He easily made it into first, kissing Kate's unmoving cheek as he jogged peacefully into home. Carlisle played next, hitting the ball into Tanya's waiting hand.

Then Emmett pulled up, swing the bat with a confident skip. "Ready, baby?" he called toward Rosalie.

She smirked back. "More than!"

He smiled when Alice threw her fastest ball yet, launching the ball directly at Rosalie. She jumped high for it, but the ball went just out of her reach. By the time we had stopped the play, Garrett was on third and Emmett on second.

Edward stepped up.

He took one long look at me. Winked and pointed at me. The message was clear—_game on._

"Dude!" Emmett called, "That's not fair! She's a newbie and your gonna pick on her!"

"I looked directly back at Edward, perfect eye contact.

He smirked and crouched down low, waiting for the pitch.

Alice threw a curve ball, and the ball made contact with a swing that vibrated through the thin Alaskan air.

I heard it coming—swooshing through the wind—before I saw it.

It was headed directly above my head.

I quickly rolled back on my heels, going into a backwards flip. The world around me went into a blur of color, swirling through the air. I caught the ball mid flip, the force stinging my stone hand. By the time I my first toe his the cold, wet ground, I was throwing the Ball to Irina. She caught it, touching home and eliminating Garrett. The, she hit Tanya, and she tagged Emmett.

One ball, three outs.

Esme and Carmen cheered from the sidelines. I lowered my eyelashes, embarrassed.

"Yes," I heard Jasper say to Emmett, thick sarcasm layer in his tone, "I think Edward should have gone much easier on Bella. We almost got a base on that one."

Everyone but Emmett howled with laughter, and I bit my lip, looking away from the crowd.

By the time everyone had calmed down, Edward was running out of the field, taking my place on the outfield. He grabbed a hold of my hips.

"I hope you don't think that's as hard this game's going tom get," he asked me, running his nose along my jaw.

I just laughed dodging out of his grasp to got bat.

The game continued like that, back and forth, back and father. About the seventh inning, the score was 26-30 for girls.

Jasper picked up the bat, and the force of his swing was over my head, directly into the forest behind me. I shook my head, jetting into the wood to retrieve the ball. Snow whirled through the air behind me.

I finally found it, wedged between two tree branched.

Then the smell hit my sense like a ton of bricks. I inhaled deeply, testing it again. My posture automatically went defense, crouching down close to the ground. The baseball was entirely forgotten.

The smell was like fresh papayas and smoke, yet somehow managed to stay sweet.

Vampire. Immortal.

I stretched my senses outward, trying to locate the position of my foe. It seemed to go t my left. I took a step backwards—ready to escape and flee back to Edward—when the scent completely disappeared.

There was no rustling or swaying of the wind. Everything went dismally quite.

I was frightened.

Then, abruptly, a hand clasped around my mouth, and the smell was soaked into me.

"Don't scream," a deep, calm voice told me.

The calmness was anything but soothing.

I struggled against my captor, trying to use his weight against him. He saw my intent and held my still.

I couldn't cream. I couldn't fight.

He was going to kill me.

I had only recently gotten my life in order. Was I only aloud two short months of happiness before it was all taken away? Was that the price I had to pay?

"I don't want to hurt you," he said into my skin, his grip growing tighter.

He was going to make this painless. He was going to be a merciful murderer.

With starling speed, he turned his, so that we both faced the baseball field.

I herd Edward's honey-velvet voice call out my name.

No! He couldn't die! Not like this!

Then the man behind me was completely gone, his hand ripped away from my mouth, dragging across my skin.

I flipped around to see Garrett's growling form hovering above another man's and they fought like rapid animals.

"Garrett!" I shouted. "No!"

He hopped up, circling the enemy. It was only then that I was able to get a good look at him.

His skin was an olive, Mediterranean shade—the pale pallor lying overtop. His eyes were a blood red—he had recently eaten. I grew far more worried. He would be at his strongest. He was largely muscled—possibly rivaling Emmett—and his hair was a deep jet black.

I felt a set of stone arms wrap around my waist, pulling my backwards. I recognized them immediately.

Edward.

His lips touched my throat, skimming across my satin skin.

He pushed me quickly behind him.

"You're going to die," Edward hissed at the man. His normally calm, prestin voice was suddenly layered with menace and ice cold fury.

The man looked shocked. "You can see me?" he asked, keeping his posture on the defensive, for Garrett was continuing to growl at him.

"As easily as I can kill you," he answered, crouching forward.

Edward was about to leap, aiming for my captors head, when Carlisle sun-shin voice yelled from directly behind us.

"Edward! Wait!"

The blonde angel came into view then, placing a cautioning hand on Edward's shoulder.

"He threatened Bella," was all Edward said, his body shacking from the intensity of fury.

I wrapped my arms around him, trying to provide some meager level of comfort. His body slumped slightly in mine.

Carlisle turned his head towards the murderer.

"What is the meaning of this, Alex?" He asked the man.

"Alex?" Emmett voice thundered. "You've heard of this bastard, Carlisle."

The man relaxed his posture significantly and chuckled lowly, his eyes trained on a hissing Garrett.

"I'm positive you've all heard of me." He turned to look at each one of us in turn, tracing our perfect features.

"I'm Alexander."

There was a thick, pregnant pause. \

"The Great."


	16. Chapter 16

**I just wanted to give a slight apology for springing that last character on you. I know it doesn't make much sense now, but it will soon. This chapter is a little lemony, by the way. **

Chapter 16

"Huh?" Emmett called out, his tone reeking with confusion and skepticism. His thoughts were very similar, laced with shocked.

Almost all of my family member's mind wer similar.

But I couldn't focus on their minds—their thoughts.

I was too consumed with the enraged and murderous cries echoing through my entire being. I needed his death on my hands—needed it more than all the blood in the world. I craved to feel his shrieks of pain as my bare fingers ripped each of his limbs off one by one, finally tearing his smug and challenging grin off his body. I would laugh as he burned, dancing on the ashes.

I have never—not even in the midst of my new born years—felt a harsh bloodlust take over me as this one did.

I was almost completely other than myself—could see the glint o a monster in my eyes through other's view.

The only thing that managed to connect the evil creation in my eyes now to the Edward I used to know was the feel of Bella's smooth, soft arms encircling me.

She needed me to be man. Not a murderer. Even if my victim had threatened her, Bella would never be one to condone an act of evil.

I fought against the demons inside of me, forcing them backwards.

I tried to focus on the people around me, their thoughts—as it would help calm me down. But not Garrett's mind, of course.

He was almost as furious as me. Almost. And his fury wasn't help to shield mine—to let go of the scent beneath nose of the flavor of red that melted into my tongue.

"What do you mean, "The great?" Kate asked, tugging on Garrett's shoulder to get him to move. He didn't budge an inch, and my small amount of appreciation from him grew.

The man—the _bastard_—that called himself Alexander chuckled lowly. I gritted my teeth in barely concealed fury. He took two steps to the side, closer to Carlisle and Tanya and further away from Garrett.

"The emperor of Macedonia? One of the greatest military leaders known to man?" his words were clouded with a thick edge of humor in his tone. He held up his hands in a sign of feigning modesty. _Such a strange coven…_he thought. _And how could they have seen me? _

I was still to consummed with murderous desires to wonder over his idiotic thoughts.

"I know it's been a while, he went on to say, carefully keeping up his worriless façade, "But I am almost positive I haven't been entirely forgotten."

He was disappoitne when the faces around him did not shift from thier aprehinsive expression.

He was anything, however, but worriless. His thoughts were rapid, calculating how many of us he could take down, before we were able to kill him.

_I can do it with out any help_. I silently.

No.

Not with Bella here. Not when she desverese better than a killer.

The man I was trying exteemly hard not to kill turned to look at each of indivually, his mind noting who looked like a threat and who could be easily taken care. He was most concerned abut Jasper's battle scars and Emmett's sixe. He intantly decieded handling me wouldn't be a problem at all. I resisted the urge to tell im that if it came to a fight, Jasper and Emmett would be holding _me_back from killing him.

Alexander had skipped over Carlisle and instead focused on Tanya, his scarlet eyes growing wide his his pale face. He moved his gaze to her bare feet, tracing upward s until the stares connected. Tanya's unnatrually pink lips were curved upwards in a smirk, her hand plced out her hips. The russina succubess knew exactly what the warrior was doing and couldn't help but enjoy the attention.

_Handsome, this one,_she told herself. A_nd strong. But...parhaps I'm delusonal but...something seems different about him. Brave. Compassionate_. Then, mentally, she chastized herself_. He just tried to kill a member of Carlisle's coven. An innocent, unprovoking girl. Edward's mate. Would a kind man do such a thing?_

Alexander took a step closer to the pondering femal. Everyone--but Carlisle and Tanya--growled at the movement. There was no way in hell he was threatening another member of this family and getting out without looking like a jigsaw puzzel.

_It's got to be her,_ the man told himself. _She fits the discription perfectly. Beautiful, delicate, lovely. Has a suprisingly storng sense of independece, while also not kowing what to do with it. _Then, his thougts turning towards a lewder path, _And she seems even more tempting then I imagined. Even after my old partner's speech of warning I never would have thought..._ his mind trailed off in a disgusting, crass path. He was imagining getting Tanya alone, and what he wanted to do with her there. And in the same instance--even as I fought to block his images--I also felt a strange touch of tenderness. Of adoration.

Like a monster who would threaten Bella--_my _Bella; the thread of my entire existence--would be able to feel such emotions.

He bowed lowly to her, his shoulder lenth onyx hair--tied back into a sloppy ponytail--swept the floor as he bent his waist lowly.

"It's a_..._pleasure to meet you," he told her, stepping in closer to her.

"I can't say I feel the same." Tanya bit back, though there was no malice in her thoughts. She knew, somehow, that she was gratful to know this strnage man...

Alexander looked upset be her frosty answer. "Why is that, my'lady?" he questioned, his thick eyeborws furrowing in worry.

"I'm not typically fond of people who threaten my family."

Behind me, her small hand fisted into peices of my shirt, I felt Bella tense. I spun around at once, so I was facing her and placd both hands on her beautiful face.

Her golden eyes were large with pain and horror, her soft lip tucked in between her razor teeth. She wasn't looking a me--her gaze trained on the gorund below her. She looked guilty and ashamed for something, though I couldn't image what it was.

Then, quite suddenly, the realization hit me.

Bella was _here_. She was alive, here, with me. She was fine and beautiful and perfect.

She was perfectly, beautifully, lively and Bella.

And I was being an idoit, all of my attention absorbed into usless murderous pursutes.

"I responded in defense," I heard Alexander say from a far ways off, in a world not of my own. "She tensed in battle, I moved in to make sure she couldn't atttack."

"Sounds a bit paranoid." I heard Jasper--was that Jasper? I was too mezmerzed by the beauty before me to tell--comment dryly.

'It's kept me alive all these years," the emperor intergected with seriousness, "Well, that and the use of my talent?"

"What is that?" I heard the deep rumble of an excited Emmett ask through the thick haze of my mind.

"Invisablitlty."

The entire group around me oohed and awwed at his ability, but I could place the thoughts of anyone.

I was consumed with Bella. I needed her, loved her, wanted her. This...this feeling of fire burned inside of me contiued onwards...pulsing through myentire being. I couldn't think of anything but her because nothing else mattered.

Her name beat inside my head like the heavy thump of a human heart.

Bella.

Bella.

Bella.

I could pause the mantra in me, simmering through my mind.

"Carlisle," the words burst from my lips without me thinking about them, before even considering the consequences. "Why don't you take our..._guest_," even in my Bella-induced haze I snarled the title, "To Tanya's home for a little while. With the rest of the family." I couldn't tear my eyes from the angel before me. She looked up suddenly, her wide eyes heavy with a thick layer of lust.

"Wait," the swine spoke up in a firm voice, "I have a warning to give you first. To Isabella." He looked towards Tanya expectantly.

The strawberry-blonde shook her head at once, denying the name. "Not me," she told him.

I saw Bella's lips moved before I registered the words in her bell voice. "It's me."

Alexander looked surpised. _She's not exactly what I imagined._, he told himself. _Pretty enough, I suppose, but not even close to the Aφροδίτ she was described as. _

I didn't even care enough about the wrench to snarl at the translation. Any man who couldn't see how unearthly beautiful Bella was, was a blind idiot.

"You are Isabella?" He asked, and Bella nodded, not taking her eys off mine. "Then I must tell you--"

Carlisle placed a genlty, but firm hand on the solider's shoulder. "Not now," he said quickly. My father could se what Bella and I needed--the connectionwe had at the moment, so much stronger than usual. "Please, why don't we all go to the house and tidy up. Unless the warning is of immediant life and death, we all need a chance to rest."

Alexander was looking directly at Tanya as he replied, "That sounds fine, my friend."

As soon as the words were out of the mongrel's mouth, Bella and I were flying. I ran through the forest to our home, her right hand grapsed firmly in mine. She was behind me--not able to keep the rapid pace--but never once asked about my hastiness. As soon the large Cullen manison was in sight, the green wood whirling around us is a blur of colors, i pulled her inside, leaving dents in the front door do to my haste.

I dragged Bella inside behind me at once, pinned her small, supple body against the wall and pushing my form towards her. My hands traveling upwards to wrap around her small waist and pull her towards to feel her wonderful curves massage with my body. I kissed her with passion and without hesitants. My mouth ravished her, her pink tounge melting deliously with my own.

I needed her. More than anthing.

I pulled away from her tantilizing mouth, moving o lay my head on her shoulder. I breathed in her sweet floral scent, forcing myself to hold back the dry sobs that threatened to pour from me.

"I almost lost you," I breathed into her heavenly skin. My grip around her figure tightened. I had to make sure she was really here--to prove to myself that I hadn't let go of the only mportant thing I could have ever needed.

Bella's nimble fingers ran through my hair in a soothing movment, rubbing my scalp with a gently pressure.

"But you didn't," she assured me, her tone reassuring. "I'm right here, Edward. I'd never leave you."

I looked up into her eyes, trying to show her how much I loved her--needed her for my very survival. "Male me a promise, Bella." I all but ordered her. "Promise me that you ever have to choose between your life and someone elses--_anyone _else's--you'll always be selfish. Please. I need you to be."

Bella hesitated and opened her mouth to protest, but stopped as she saw my expression. Her eyes closed slowly, her forhead dropping to rest aganst mine.

"I promise, Edward."

And then I kissed her again. I couldn''t help it--couldn't fight against the instinct.

Soon Bella was kissing back, her lovely limbs wrapped around me. Then, together we bacame a flurry of pale skin and maons and gaps for air.

"God, _Edward,_" I heard her breathly groan call out to me. I shievered as I heard my name sound so temping on her tounge. "Take me." She whispered against my open mouth. "Please, I...I--_oh, God_--it's all I need."

I didn't wait for a moment beofr epicking Bella up bridal style and racing up the stairs.

I wanted this. She wanted this. It was stupid to refuse her.

\I placed Bella on the bed, and it wasn't a second before her silky hands grasped my forearms, pulling me on top of her mible body. I She kissed me, plunging her talented tounge into my willing mouth. It was my turn to moan as she reached her hands underneath my basball jersey, feeling the contors of my chest.

"Do I make you feel good?" she asked quietly, barely whispering the words.

I gave a strained chuckle. "You have no idea."

Her eyes twinkled with excitment and yet seemed to be heavy with diare. The sight of her expression--that glorious exprssion--made the already tightening in my neather region erupt ten fold. I wanted her--_needed her--_ so badly it felt like i would explode within myself at every moment.

"Show me." Bella whispered, brushing her lips against my collar bone.

I set out to do just that.

I rolled us over, so Bella was staddling my lap. I ran my hands up her ribs, trailing down to pull at the hem of her t-shirt. I pulled it over her head at the soonest sign of permission, leting myself gaze at the wonder before me. I had seen Bella's torso bare only once before--only shown in a lacy black bra. My mouth practically watered at the sight of her.

I kissed her jaw as Bella placed both of her hands--palms spread open--on my chest. I growled slowly from the touch. I brought my kisses downwards, sucking lightly at her collarbone. I wanted to move lower, kiss lower, _touch_lower.

I looked up for Bella's permission and she nodded, her eyes clamped shut in what looked like passion.

I removed her lacey undergrment and--

_oh, god_.

She's even more beautiful than I could have imagined. And that, certainly is saying something.

Soon, after I had taken all of the proper time worshiping bella ravishing upper body--my shirt being ripped to shreds by the angel in the process--we moved lower. m

And then, my flipping the goddess above me over, we were one.

My thoughts became single words, to obsrobed in the things I sensed to form logical thoughts.

Hot.

Tight.

Wet.

Bella chanting below me.

Nails scratching my back.

Legs wrapping around my waist.

Pushing me in deeper...furthur..._I--Holy--GOD. _

White. Blaring. Blinding.

The world desloved in a firey sotrm of bliss. I couldn't see straghit--see anything.

Even my monosyllable thoughts lost meaning.

Only Bella.

Again, the heartbeats.

Bella.

Bella.

Then, after both of us climbed down from our heavenly heights, I rolled beside her, pulling her body gently next to mine.

One word. Only one word could mean anything to me at this time.

"Bella," I sighed deeply.

She looked up at me and smiled, her lips brushing against my shoulder.

"I love you," she told me, her eyes closing.

I was about to reply when my cell rang from across the room, still in my pant's pocket.

We both groaned again, but in exasperation.

Reality was creeping in on us.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Edward sighed lowly, his velvet-honey voce sounding even smoother than was usual as he ruefully climbed out of bed, his naked form rivaling a young god's. I watched him, transfixed, as his skin glistened in the sinlight drifted from his window.

For some reason, I felt utterly exashted. As an immortal, it should hve been impossible to feel the least bit tired.

But somehow, my bones seemed to melt into my skin, my breaths still coming in gasps. I fell back against my pillows, the fluffy fabric soft beneath my scalp. I could feel the knots in my hair, where Edwar's fingers had fisted themselves in my brown locks.

I couldn't seem to stop replaying the images of our last movements—of how we had fit together…Every thought that came into my mind was of Edward.

Of his hand.

Of his lips.

Of the way each of his muscle's fexled bneath my finger tips.

How his sculpted chest felt as I ran my fingers over the chisled planes, his hips pressing firmly into mine.

Every touch and caresses had been full of desperation and need; of needing to know that we had the other with us. That we always would.

I had once thought that I would never be with a man that way—never completely, wholly. I was not like Victoria or James; casual partners never seemed all that appealing. It was as if making love become about pleasing yourself instead of pleasing your partner.

Making love should have been about more than carnal pleasure.

And now that I had love—it was. Being with Edward that way was about so much more.

Across the room from me, his voice the only thing that could break me from his haze, I heard Edwared answer the phone.

"Hi Edward," Alice's musical voice rings out through the end. "I just wanted to warn you that all the small talk around here is getting boring. Emmett wants answers and he's getting to the point we hems going to drag you and Bella out of the house in your…_current state_ or not_. _You might want to wrap things up."

I was instantly embarssed, folding my arms across my chest for some symblise of modesty.

Had Alice….had she _seen_ that? Seen us…together? I couldn't imagine how I was going to face her again.

Edward chuckled at the sight of my embarrassment, crossing the room to cup his hand gently around my cheek. I can't help but lean into the touch, feeling the lines of his palm against my unblushing cheek.

"Thank you for the warning, Alice." He smiled at me, winking with playfulness.

I smiled back, my hands still clamped around me chest.

"Oh," Alice continued on the phone. "And don't forget to make sure Bella brushes out her hair. Emmett will tease her into the next century if she sees that rats nest."

My eyes went wider than quarters, my mouth hanging open in pure mortification.

Edward's eyes go wider as well, his hand dropping down from my cheek to my bare shoulder. His fingers drew smooth circles into my skin and I shiever from the delite sensation. How could I still want him so much, even after all of that?

Edward tucked his bottom lip in between his teeth, his grip on the small cellular phone tightening to a point I should have been worried he'd break it.

I should have, but honestly, I couldn't focus on much else but the blazing look in Edward's golden eyes.

"No, Edward, don't you dare—" I hear Alice begin in a slow, threatening tone.

Edward cut her off imediantly. "Hold Emmett off for a while, will you sister?" And, before she could reply, he snapped the phone shut, tossing it carelessly across his bedroom.

Suddenly he was kssing me again, gently pushing me back onto the bed. I wasn't too worried about modesty long after that.

* * *

"They're never going to let us forget this, are they?" I qeustioned, squeezing Edward's hand tightly to ensure that he was here.

Edward was smiling at me, his eyes bright with amusment. His hair was still a wreck—though, for him, it didn'tlook nearly as conspicuous as it had for me.  
My lips felt swolllon and my skin oddly flushed. I wasn't aware sex could make me look so different.

But even if there was physical proof of what Edward's and I had done for last few hours, I had other things to worry about.

First of all, there was Alexander. Even though he had shown to not willing hurt me, his presence here still frightened me. He was here to warn me from something—from James? Were the Cullens in danger? Could I do anything to save them?

Was _Edward _in trouble?

I knew—as Edward probably did too—that I wouild always break my promise where he was concerned.

And, though it seemed somehow trivial in comparison, I was worried about Garrett. My older brother had proven to be nothing if not protective of me—over-protective, most would argue. I had the

feeling he wouldn't take too kindly to finding out I had been…._deflowered._

The last thing I wanted was for the two most important men in my life to get into an argument. Again.

"Are you ready?" Edward asked from beside me, bringing my hand ip to place a gentle kiss in the center of my palm.

I sighed, forcing myself to focus on anything other than his lips on my skin....

"Do I have a chioce?"

Edward chuckled lightly, dropping our connected hands back between us. The look in his eyes was sympthetic--as though he knew what was coming next and how mortified I was about to become.

I turned to look at Edward, taking a deep, soothing breath to make sure I was fully prepared. I had Edward. No matter what should happen, I would always have Edward.

"Let's get it over with."

Edward let out another slow chuckle and opened the door, his hand gently turning the golden door knob. We entered Tanya's home with slow steps. From the outside, it looked much like the Cullen's house--a long house composed of wooden logs. But, instead of the multi-story mansion, Tanya's house was a singular level building that went as long as a football field.

Inside, however, the styles were completely different. Where the Cullen's house had the old, classic--yet still stylish--feel, Tanya's home was bright and colorful, and much more modorn. The home could have been the inside of a fashionable night club just as easily as a house.

On the couch in the parlor--the opening room--sat Kate, Alice, and Jasper. As soon the door shut behind us, all three of their perfect bodies turned toward us. Alice and Kate broke out in the same smug grins. I could practically feel the impossible blush creeping in on my cheeks.

Jasper was grinning too, but his teasing was aimed directly at Edward. I turned to see my mate's mouth set in a deep frown, his eyes narrowed at Jasper. "You're hilarious." he told his brother, shaking his head.

Emmett came into the room then, smirking broadly at us. Garrett and Carlisle were following close behind him "Well, well, well," Emmett chortled in a mock-serious tone. "Look who finallly got out of bed!"

I dropped my eyes at once, embarrassed.

"Di you even make it to the bed?" Emmett went on for a moment, "Or was little Bella toO excited to make it that far."

I covered my face with my hands, burrowing in them, just wishing I could disappear. Edward rubbd his hand on my shoulder, the motion soothing to me. I peaked hesitantly between my finger, biting roughly on my lower lip. If I were human, blood would have trinkled out.

Garrett punched Emmett on the shoulder, the sound of banging marble echoing through the house. "Hey man," he said, his voice angry and harsh. "Don't talk about my sister that way."

Emmett rubbed his shoulder, wincing slightly. He rolled his eyes, muttering a low "Some people can't take a joke." He went to sit on the floor beside Alice.

Edward attempted to change the subject. "Where's Alexander. I want to hear this...warning."

Garrett snorted darkly. "More like _threat._"

Everyone else ignored him.

I looked to see edward's head turned toward the side, his eyes unfocused as if hee were listening to something. I was just about to ask hm what he heard when the entire room was surprised.

Suddenly, everyine in the room shocked, the nearest door to the broom closet was knocked off it's hinges. Two fingers came tumbling out--one male and one female. The woman squealed loudly, her giggle of excitment bouncing off the walls. He hair was the color of a warm sunset and her small, pale hands, grasped the shoulders of the man on top of her. The man was bracing himself on his forarms, his dark hair looking like it had been pulled on repeatedly. He was smiling down at the woman, his laughter low and hypnotic. The man's shirt was almost completely torn off, all the buttons missing. The woman had lost both shoes.

After half a second, both of them looked up to met our shocked expressions.

Garrett was the first to break the spell of tension in the room.

"What the hell is going on?!" he shouted.

Tanya pulled herself out from under Alexander's weight, flattening her hair out to the best of her abilities. "I can explain--" she began.

Alexander interupted her, getting up to grab her hand in his. He looked down at her, his expression filled with love and adoration. I gasped.

He loved her. Oh god, he _loved_ her.

"We can explained." he corrected her. And then, so small I almost missed it, he smiled at her.

The moment was filled with so much love that I had the urge to grab Edward's hand, just so I could have a peice of it. It wass lovely--magical almost.

That is, until, Garrett jumped onto Alex, knocking him to the floor so hard that the floor boards cracked underneath his gaze.

I could see it in my brother's--the hatred. The fire that threatened to break free. The murder.

He was going to kill Alex. To kill Tanya's mate.

I reacted without consideration of my life--a mistake that could have killed more than just myself.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

I am fast, even for my kind. No one in my family could catch up to me when I was running--though it felt more like flying. Only Alice ever had a chance of gaining one up on me when we hunted, and then it was just barely.

But not even I had been fast enough to predict Bella's next move.

I was as captivated as everyone else was while watching Garrett pin Alexander to the floor, his teeth nearing the soldier's throat for a kill. He drew close enough to see his breath on the pale skin, just barely cooling on the surface. Part of me, the sane half, knew that I need to intervene immediately. Alexander had a warning to deliver, a message which was imperritve I receive. I needed him alive. But that half was being smothered by my wild, primitive nature, who could clearly recall Bella's life being threatened by the savage Garrett was about to murder. The half which dedused that his mate would be safer if Alexander was not alive. That side of him wanted his enemy dead with a passion do deep it was burning inside of him, almost as painfully as the tranformation that once flowed through my now empty veins.

I would always save Bella from everything. From the fires of death, from te claws of our enimies, and even from the emotion torture of sadness or pain.

But the one thing--one damned thing--that might ever have half a chance in hell of getting through my protection of Bella was herself.

And theory was tested as soon as Bella flung herself across the room, her limbs turning into a grace blur of pale skin. I moved forward automatically, attempting to grasp her arm, but she was too quick for me.

Bella moved with the strength and speed of a hunter, her body colliding with her brothers in a loud clash of marble. They rolled together until they were a few feet away from Alexander's body, my mate pinned on top of a still snarling Garrett. She had his arms pushed roughly onto the floor, her knees planted on the floor beside him. She was growling too, but it was a low warning instead a proclamation of fury.

I was overly tense now, my muscles hard in preporation for attack. I knew, logically, that Garrett would never hurt Bella. He cared for his sister almost as much as I did.

But it didn't change the fact that if he messed up a single hair on her head they would be piecing his wretched body back together for weeks.

"What the hell do you think your doing?" Garrett growled at Bella, his tone slowly becoming more composed.

Bella's voice was carefully even, as though she was reigning in her true anger. "Stopping you from doing something stupid."

Stupid?! Garrett's mental voice shouted, his fury returning. "I was protecting this family!" he yelled at her. I growled lowly, crouching slightly. I was not going allow anyone to speak to my Bella that way.

Bella pushed down harder on her brother's arms, sensing his urge to push her off.

"How is murderering an innocent man going to protect anyone?" Then, her stare hardening to a point where even I felt slightly itimidated. "I thought my brother was better than that. It seems you've changed a bit, Garrett."

I've changed? Garrett roared in his mind. I've changed? ME!? I rushed forward now, just steps away from rescuing my Bella. I could hear Garrett's mental desion to send her flying across the room in just enough time to reach her. I was already beginning to move forward when Jasper's firm hand grasped my shoulder, holding me back. Interrupting my furry, my brother was sending strong vibes of fatigue in my direction. I felt as if I could sleep.

But my true, unaltered rage was driving back Jasper's conflicting emotions, pushing them as far back as they could go in my body. I snarled loudly, attempting to throw him off me. Emmett came to Jasper's assistance at once, wrapping his arms around my chest like a giant boa constrictor.

Bella had looked up at me breifly, her expression concerned and bewildered. In that time, where her attention had diverted for only a fraction of a second, Garrett gained the upper hand. He pushed back against Bella, wedging his foot in between them. Then, only using a small portion of his streght, as not to hurt her, he kicked Bella, sending her body crashing into the wall facing them.

I cringed and struggled against Emmett's arms as I heard the thunder of Bella's steel body hitting the wall, flecks of plastor falling onto the floor. Out of the corner of my eye, just barely a blimp on my radar, I saw Kate hiss loudly, clenching her fist in anger. Irina moved closer, just making sure that her sister didn't do anything rash, even to save her mate.

I could empathize with her entirely.

Bella straightened her posture immediantly, watching as Garrett rose to his feet, crouching down threateningly.

"I'm not the one who has changed, Isabella." He said, a deep growl forming in the base of his venom coated throat.

Bella's eyeborws arched high, her soft mouth twisted into a menacing scowl. "Are you saying I have?" she asked rhetorically, as if challenging him to answer her.

"My parents didn't raise a girl who attacks her family."

"Our parents didn't raise a boy who murdered innocent people."

"Like their sister's, perhaps?"

The room was thick with tension, until a snarled ripped violently from my throat. I thrashed against my brothers' grips, determained to get to my mate. I watched, with horror filled eyes, aas Bella's small body began to quiver with dry sobs. Her eyes were glued to the floor, unwilling to meet anyone else's gaze. I cried out to silently, begging for her to met my eyes.

Bella shouldn't feel guilty about Sarah. She was young when it happened--barely a week old--and it would be ridiculous for anyone to expect a new born to be able to control themselves so early. No one here, including her brother, felt ashamed to know her.

But how dare he bring that up! Garrett knew--fucking knew-- how that moment of time haunted her every step. How if there was anything Bella could do to get her sister back, she would have done it long ago. Why on earth would he say something like that to upset her? Did he suddenly want to rip his sister apart by the seamns, killing her emotions forevermore?

I was going to rip him apart at the seams, Emmett and Jasper be damned.

Bella was whispering quietly, her words carrying lightert than a feather in the blowing wind. "I didn't mean...if I had known...It was an accident...I loved her..."

Esme came forward then, her thoughts cased in a blanket of kindness. The poor dear. Her own sister...I can't even imaigine the pain. My mother pulled Bella's quivering form against her, kissing her lightly on the head. "Of course you did sweetheart," she whispered against Bella's locks.

I tried to pull from Emmetts restraints again, but he held steady. I wanted so badly to be the one holding my Bella, to comfort her, that dry tears began forming in my topaz eyes, the sting building within them.

Garrett's mind was still flying with fury--now that he had opened his mouth, not even a crying sister would stop his tirade. "You know what, Bella? That's not even the worst of how you've changed. My sister--my Issy--would never have been with a man so much older than herself. And then you...you let him...deflower you! I can't even begin to describe the shame father would have! Your a sixteen year old, and unmarried! It makes you look bad, like some kind of a...of a...a"

Not even Garrett had the gile to finish his satment.

A fury flashed in Bella's eyes that I had never seen before. They held a deep, slow fire. It devoured only what it needed to--like the slow torture of a match instead of the burning of a forest fire. Her gaze was power. Pure, unalduterated power.

Bella gently pushed my mother out of harms way, turning back to face her brother. She took a small, deliberate step towards Garett, and then stopped.

"I look like a what, Garrett?"

She took another step forward.

"A harlot?" she questioned.

Step.

"A floosie?"

The crack of her heel against the white tile floor.

"A Jezebel?"

The vibrations of her foot hitting the ground beneath us.

"A slut?"

Bella's fiinal move putting her so close to Garett that her breath fanned out on his chest, the sweet smell echoing through my nose even this far away.

Then, her voice in a cold, firm whisper.

"A whore." It was not a question.

Garrett stayed silent, his eyes trained in front of him.

"Say it, Garrett," Bella said, almost demanding it this time. "I could always tell when you were trying to hold you tongue. Tell me what your thinking."

The, the deep sould frezzing in the air, Garett breathed out, too quiet for any human to hear, "I think you look like a whore, Issy."

I was too stunned to growl. I was too stunned to do anything.

Bella was the first to break the silence in the tense room. "Lets get a few things straight, brother." Her tone was blunt, demanding. Bella began again. "I'm not sixteen, I'm a two hundred and twleve, as you well know. I am a grown woman and can make descions for myself just fine." She grabbed Garetts chin, forcing him to look her in the eye. "And I love Edward." she spoke the words so purly, that no one could doubt her sincerity. Again, I felt like I could cry. "I love him the way you love Kate. And I respect Kate, as you should respect Edward. and," she said "as the grown woman I am, whatever happens in Edward and my bedroom is private. And none. Of your. Damn. Concern.

"And lastly, Tanya is also an adult. Hell, she's older than both of us put together. The last thing you need to do is try to tell her how to run her...affairs." Then, glancing back at the strawberry blonde succubus, she added kindly, "No offense meant."

Tanya raised her hands in acceptance. "None taken." she tod her seriously.

Bella looked back at Garrett, and her eyes turned back to a cold fury. "I love you Garrett." she told him, "Your my brother. I'll always love you." She turned away then, hiding her face in her deep locks. Her voice was cracked, as though she was crying. "But right now, I can't even stand to look at you."

I saw the brown haired man give a low growl, turning his back to Bella to walk out of the front door. On his way out, he knocked over a lampshade, the cracking of the lightbulb peircing the air.

The entire chamber was tense in silnce.

Kate moved to Bella, giving her a tight hug.

She did the right thing, Garrett's wife thought, though she was mostly concerned with her mate's well being.

As the front door closed behind Kate, Bella gathered her stregth. I heard her inhale a deep breath and then turned to a shocked Alexander, who was till sprawled out across the floor near the coat closet.

"How about that warning?" she asked, trying to make her tone buiness-like.

In actuallity, she sounded broken. Hurt.

I was finally released from my brothers hold and I rushed forward, picking Bella up into a hug that would kill any human. I felt her curves mold to my form, her arms coming over my shoulder and around my neck. Her face was pushed into my shoulder, her skin rubbing into the soft fabric of my dress shirt.

And she began to sob. I had never felt so whole and so shattered in the instant.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

"Shh, Bella, shh." I heard Edward's velvety-honey voice whisper to my ear, his soft lips brushing against my skin. "He didn't mean it."

I continued to sob into Edward's strong, broud shoulder for a few more moments, replaying that last few minutes in my head. I knew Edward was wrong--Garrett _did_ mean what he said. Garrett had always been honest with me--even when it hurt. He valued truthfulness more than any other quality. So when my brother had said I was a...had called me such monstoties, I knew he told the truth.

What _would _my parents have thought of me?

For so long now, I have lived in an age where marital sex isn't frowned upon, that I have forgotten all of the lessons my parents had invoceted in me! I was taught that virture, above all else, was precious to a woman. And even if you love someone as deeply as I loved Edward, a woman's virture was supposed to wait for the wedding night.

But so much had changed, since these lessons were taught. Now women could vote and wear pants and do almost anything a man could. Relationships were different now.

Should I follow the rule of the society I raised in, or the one I lived in now?

Edward's hand crawled up my back, resting in between my shaking shoulder blades. I could feel the softnees of his finger tips even through the thick layer of my shirt, the warmth of his touch as he drew small circles into the fabric. I inhaled deeply, feeling his scent settle into every fiber of my being. Slowly, my shallow sobs began to calm, the fists clutching at Edward's shirt lossened until I was able to pull away from his comforting body. His arms didn't seem to want to leave

I needed to speak to Edward about this--about marriage.

But first, the warning.

I was clamer now, and feeling completely mortified at my actions.

"I'm sorry," I apologized, mowly, mumbling it in the direction of the ground. "I'm making a horific scene. Please..." I aimed my apology at our guest, Alexander. He must of thought I was some sort of hysterical maniac. I was embarassing the Cullen family. I directed my thoughts down a less mortifying path--hoping to change the subject. "The warning."

"Bella," Carlisle said from the corner, stepping forward hesitantly. "Perhaps we should wait until Garrett--"

"No." I interupted swiftly, trying to keep my voice poliet. "I'd much rather go ahead and do this now."

Edward was till rubbing smooth circles into my shoulder blades, and I could feel his breath absorb into my hair.

Alexander finally rose himself off the floor--he had yet to stand after his confromtation with Garrett. He cast a soft, adoring gaze with Tanya. The sunrise haired goddess stepped forward to meet his streched hand, sighing as it curved around her pale cheek. I had to look away at their exchange--it seemed so loving and kind that I was almost embarrassed by watching.

After a few seconds, Alex nodded and said, "The warning." He nodded to the couches. "Shall we sit?"

I nodded as well, moving forward. Before I could take more than three steps, I felt Edward's fingers clap around mine and pulling me cloe. He buried his nose in my neck, breathing out. I sighed deeply, letting my body lean tightly against his. "I'm so sorry, Bella." he whispered to me, his words lighter than a whisp of wind. "You don't deserve to be spoken to like that. I feel so..." He closed his eyes and inhaled. I could sense his tense muscles relaxing, his tone becoming calm to a point of terrifying. "I'll be having a _chat_ with your brother once this is over."

I pulled back to object--the last thing I wanted was to start a feud over this--I had begun enough drama to last for the next century already. Before I could open my mouth, Edward placed one cool, strong finger against my lips, shushing me silently. He gave a half-hearted smile and took my hand more delicartly in his, pulling us over to the couch.

After all of us had situated--Tanya perched gracfully on the arm of the couch grasping Alex's firm hand, Ale next to me, and I sat halfway fo Edward's willing lap. Alice and Jasper were in a similar position to ours, but curled up on the recliner across from us. I could scene Carlisle and Eleazar quitely wacthing the scene from the stairs, their calm demenors a welcome presence. Esme, Carmen, Rosalie, Emmett and Irina were nowhere to be found, though I was almost positive they could be found listening.

"I suppose," Alex began, "I should begin at the very start, when I met I first met James." Everyone of the Cullen clan flinched at the name, but did not respond. We had all expected his involvment. "Or, when I knew him, Dermocitous." Alexander's gaze drifted off into the distance...following something we could no longer see...into a time beyond all of us..."Right after the battle of Olynthus. It was just around 348 B.C when we were just about to gather the able bodied men of the city--to see how many would be willing to fight for my cause." He smiled warmly at all of us then.

"I was an arrogant young man," he said in an aoplogetic tone. "My thoughts were of domonation--of pure vengence over the Persian Empire. It was only the year before I had been proclaimed a demi-god by an old Preist. Son of Zeus. I was foolish enough to believe it. When I met Dermocitous--James--for the first time, I was amazed. He was a lonely private in my ranks, and his features were somee of which I rarely saw. Blonde hair and soft expressions, yet he still seemed to be consumed by an icy fire. I used to call him_ Λελαντο_, or Letantos, god of air and hunting skills. I soon promoted him up the ranks. I had never scene a hunter like him--I once saw him track a frog across a river, just for the wish to see it die. I was shocked by his raw diseare to kill, but thought it might be useful in war."

"When were starting our first attack on Persia--and our first win--James went missing. I was too consumed with bloodlust to focus on a missing officer, even a right hand one. After a few days, I proclaimed him missing. But, years later, when I was hit with the plauge of death, I was too confident to think I could die. Stupid, as I said. He came to me in the dead of night, when all my gaurds were fast asleep. He crept with the air of ice still, and yet his face was sharper, better defined. I thought he was a god, coming to take me to my father Zeus. I thought I had finally reach Olympus. Eternal peace." He smirked darkly, and I felt myself flinch. "You all know how wrong I was," he pointed out slowly and we all nodded, showing him that not one of us could forget the pain.

"When I had emerged from Hades clutchs, James was there. He told me of what he had become, of the immortality we had gained. he seemed extatic by the change, and I couldn't help but agree with him. I was _a god_. Finally able to reach what I had longer for over an entire lifetime. You can't possibly imagine the hope that surged through my bones--my holy soul."

"James and I traveled together for a decade or two, but I soon grew tired of him. We were a fine pair in war, but struggled in peice. We parted on friendly terms however, and when we often ran into each other, we were poliete. I knew James still played his power games and I wanted no part in that. I was a fighter, but not a murderer. I had no need to follow him."

He looked around at all of us, his scarlet orbs full of nothing but apologies and sympathy. I tensed myself for the worst. "I met up with my old comrad a few days ago, just outside of Ontario. He asked me for a favor--to track down a coven mate he felt had been _stolen_." A swift galce in my direction. "However, when I asked for further details and he told me of the reasons of your choice, Isabella--"

"Bella," I interrupted quickly, noticing the smile that filled all of my family's faces.

"Bella," he corrected. "When I heard of your choice I was feeled with empathy. How could I not have compasion for someone who just wished to be free of the blood on thier hands? So I asked for your description, feigning a promise that when I found you, I would leak your ware abouts to James. Laurant, in particular gave an..._interesting_ discription of you."

I looked down, embarrassed as I felt Edward's low growl and clenching hand around mine.

Alexander's tone was beginning to sound final--perminate. "So, Bella, my warning is this. You are on James's list will be coming fast and soon. It could be days or weeks, but he knows where you are and is planning how to strike. I am sure you know how he is--he will stop at nothing to have you, to conquor what he thinks has been taken. I will not fight against you, young one, but I can not bring myself to destroy my creator, and for that, I am sorry."

The entire house seemed silnet and calm. No one dared to breath too deeply or shuffle to loudly.

Finally, it was edward who spoke the promise.

He looked Alexander squarly in the face, his expression holding nothing but serinity and calm. "Thank you, Alex," he thanked the old King. He gave a small, crooked smile. "I owe you my life, for help to save hers," his left arm slipped around my waist squeezing me in such a loving way I wished I could shed a tear of happiness. "You have one friend in the Cullen house hold, at least."

Carlisle's laugh echoed around us as he stepped off the steps, slinking forward to place a kind hand on Edward's shoulder. "Do you doubt me so, my son?" he asked, smiling. Then, to Alexander. "I speak for my entire family to say you have our support, Alex. And our friendship."

Alex nodded his head modestly, and then turned his gaze back on to me, curiousity was lingering in the red depths. "Bella," he questioned. "May I inquire about your sheild?"

I raised my eyeborws, confused. "I'm sorry," I told him, "But I wasn't even aware I _had_ a sheild until recently."

"Oh you most certainly do," Alexander told me. "A powerful one. I've never known anyone to block out my invisibility before. In all my years."

My ears perked at the mention at this. All those centuries....

"I'd like to work with you on it, if you'll allow me? I think it can truly useful in fights."

I sat up straight, suddenly more than ready to learn. "Could you teach me to fight to? To protect myself--my family?"

He smiled at me with the air of a teacher to his favorite pupil. "Certainly. When would you like to begin?"

"Now! Immediantly!"

Everyone laughed at my eagerness.

I felt Edward squeez my hand gently and stand up. I made to follow him, but he push me gently back down. He lifted my hand, kissing the back in a soft, loving gesture. "Stay, love," he told me. "I'm just going for a...bit of a drive. I'll be back later, I promise."

"Take the northen route, Edward," Alice piped up. I blinked--she had been s quite through the entire story I had almsot forgotten she was there. "It'll be faster that way."

Edward nodded in accpetance of her words and leaned in to give a soft kiss before he walked out of the door. My eyes stayed trained on his path even seconds after he had gone...as though my entire heart had walked out as well.

"Well," Alex said, leanign in to whisper cnsipringly, even though everyone could hear our words. "No time like the present."

I gave a half hearted smile, because it seemed all I could managed when Edward wasn't in the room, and nodded. "Any time your ready, Your Highness."

He laughed and stood, exchanging a short glance with Tanya.

"You know," he told me as we walked out of the door, several people walking behind our path, "I used to a turo when I was a boy. I'm sure you've hear of him. Aristotle? He was a dear friend of mine, but had a sharp tounge when it came to punishments. For instance, on my twelf birthday he decided to..."

I smiled again.

Everything was going to work out. I could feel it in my bones, echoing in my soul.

My life was finally--_finally--_ completing itself.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

I tightened my grip on the steering wheel in front of me, forcing my danerously teetering edge of control backwards. It would serve absolutly no good to break the mudane object in half...there were much better things to take my fury out on.

For instance, Garrett.

Despite the overwhelming, murderous rage that had tried to consume my body when he had slandered my Bella--disgracing her perfectly good reptuation with uncalled for backhanded insults and digrading names--I had calmed down and urged forward just the speck of sanity that was left inside my being. I knew that I had had better things to do than go hunt Garret down and teach him a lesson of how to show him how to respect a lady.

Bella had been a wreck--she had needed me to comfort her. She had been sobbing and quivering, and if my touch had calmed her, then why what else was I able to do? My entire being had beeen pulled towards her; it physicaly _hurt_ to see my Bella in pain. She was so beatuiful--too beautiful--to be in pain. I _had _to help her. There was no other choice for me. Anyone of us would have done the same for thier mate.

And, not that I had thought of it until later, but hearing Alexander's warning was a priotity. I needed to know how close James was to finding us--finding Bella. The fact that he had sent an "old friend" to come and track us down was enough example of how much he wanted Bella back. It was not asuring in the least, but it was better we were prepared.

On top of that, however, it was important I be there to read Alexander--to make sure his thoughts were honest. It wouldn't do at all to have Jame's old contact betray us. I was pleased when I heard his story--from _inside _his mind. The old king was a good, noble man, from what I could tell. He did most things for protection for himself--self presorvation above all. But he also felt something for Tanya! Something strong and permant; feelings almost as powerful as I felt for Bella. I knew he would never do anything to betray her and that knowledge managed to sooth most of my fears.

So, when I had finished siffting through Alex's mind and calming my presious Bella, there was only one thing left to do.

Go have a little..._chat_ with my almost-brother-in-law.

I took the first keys my fingers touched, and then situated myself inside Carlisle's mercedes, taking rough turns through the slik Alaskan snow. I stretched my mind out as far as I could, tasting the mind through the air. My senses crossed a pair of hikers hving lunch a few miles off, eating a cold meal. Besides those poor souls, however, most of the Alaskan tundra was completely abandonded. Garrett's mind was easily found--Kate's alongside it. I made another sharp turn, snow spewing on the frozen concreat. I located the scoudrel quickly, and anger shook my frame. Nethier of them saw me as I positioned my body carefully behind a wide tree.

He was leaning up against a large pine, sitting on a small hill of white dust. His hands were intertwined and lying on the back of his head, which rested against his folded knees. Kate sat beside him, softly strking his hair, her expression gentle and pained. I could clearly hear her thoughts--all focused squarly on soothing his pain.

Garrett's thought were far less kind--espeacily considering himself.

_How could you be such a fool? Issy will probably never speak to you again! I was just so...so _angry._ I finally find my sister and she already doesn't need me anymore. It's all that damn boys fault--_

Boy? I frowned. Since when was being over a century old considered ..._boyish_?

_I don't like the way he looks at her. Like she _belongs_ to him. He treats her disrespectfully. And he just...he always...Dammit! Give me some more fucking reasons to hate him! _

I couldn't help but smile slightly at the thoughts that practically screamed out of Garrett's head. The truth of the matter was that he wasn't really upset with me nearly as much as he was at himself.

I stepped into thier sites, and both thier head snapped up to see me.

Garrett's gaze was full of fury while his mates bore nothing but wrry. The last thing she wanted was a fight to break out, espeacially since Garrett would all but demand she stay out of any arguments we had.

"Kate," I greeted with a nod in my cousin's direction. She nodded back slowly, her gaze flickering back to Garrett's muderous expression almost immediantly.

_Go away! _Garrett was screaming at me, his lanky figure shaking with every breath that poured from his scowling lips. He wanted to kill me...wanted to do it with his bare hands.

"I was wondering if you wouldn't give your husband and I alone for a few moments, cousin?" I finished my request.

Kate's eyebrows shot up in shot--Garrett was still too furious to show any outward change.

_Are you sure that's such a good idea? _Kate mused to me warningly.

I nodded seriously and cocked my head to the side, silently requesting she leave. I could tell from her thoughts that Kate was more than uneasy about the prospect of leaving us alone. Her eyes darted nervously between the two of us before she finally turned to face her mate comppletely. Garrett also looked at her and they had a moment of such deep emotion charged between thier gazes that I had to look away.

I missed Bella already, and seeing the unbreakable bond between others' wasn't helping the aching pain in my unbeating heat.

After a few seconds of silence, Kate made to leave. As she began walking out of the forest, I caught her attention and easily tossed her the car keys. "Take it home," I demanded. "I'll just run back."

She nodded and I soon heard the rumbling of the smooth engine drift off into the distance.

Garrett had yet to stand. I moved with slow caution and sat down against a tree across from him, my form lying in the same position. He looked at me and I looked at him. Neither of us were saying anything, and both our minds were unusually quiet.

After a few moments, I decided to be the bigger man.

"Garrett--" I began, but was instantly cut off.

His eyes were far away through the woods, not focusing on anything in this world, but far away...to a place I had never been...a place long ago...

"I know I seem over protective," he said seriously, his tone almost malicously haunting. "But she's my sister. And I love her." He shook his head just barely enough for me to see. "You can't understand," he all but whispered. His monolouge turned internal then, and I could feel the pain burning in his thoughts, It hurt me to see--I had a suprising amont of pity for Garrett.

_You can't understand, _he repeated meantally. _I know almost all of us loose every human connection we know after the transformation. In the civilaized of us, it becomes normal. Expected. Just something to forget and push away. Human memories fade, I've always been told. _He shook his head faster now--incredulous. _But my memories of Issy--Isabella--never faded. She was my best friend, and when our parents died, my mother. Everything I ever did was for her. To support her and protect her. We had a bond stronger than any other siblings I knew. And though I loved Sarah--would have died for her in a heartbeat--it just wasn't the same. _

He gave a pointed look at me. "Imagine loosing Alice," he said seriously, speaking aloud this time. "Imagine the pain of loosing her. It wouldn't be romantic, of course, but it would still feel like a part of you was being ripped out...burned alive evryday. Your sister wouldn't be _alive_. No more laughter...no more teasing...no more _protecting_ her. Imagine it, Edward."

I could imagine it--picture it. The bond my sister and I had shared _had_ seemed something other than normal. We were a different sort of soul mates--not bound as mates, but as everlasting friends. I could practically _feel_ how horrible it would be to know she was gone.

Suddenly, my pity for Garrett didn't seem suprising at all.

_When I found out she was...dead, missing, alone--I gave up hope of ever having that bond again. _He went on as I struggled to composed myself. _After my change, I couldn't remeber some things about her. I couldn't remember what color her eyes had been or her hair. Whether or not she was intellegent or pretty. Her hobbies and intrests became fuzzy. But I never forgot our bond--how much I loved my sister. It got better after I found Kate and the rest of my family, sometimes I even forgot about her for a day or two. But then the memories would come back, and it would hurt again. _

_And then I got her back_, a large grin streching across his face before quickly disloving again_. And everything seemed perfect. I was estatic to see her, t feel that bond between us once more. And then I found out she had you. _

He looked at me, glowering. And then, almost abruptly, his glare disappeared. "It wasn't _you_ personally, Edward." He said after a moment. "I'd always liked you well enough, even if you could be a bit..._depressing_. But I would have hated anyone who loved my sister like you loved her. Espeacially since she felt the same for you." His gaze fell to his lap, ashamed. I hesitantly place a hand on his shoulder. Compforting a man I had come to cause seious pain! The irony was not lost on me.

"Even though I had her back, I felt usless to her. She didn't _need_ me to protect her. To comfort her. To make her laugh. Our bond was usless to both of us. I had Kate and she had you. Where was the connection my sister and I had shared. I mourned for that love--that bond." A deep breath made silence between us. "And then, when I try to make it better between us, I had to go and let my temper get away from me again." A sad hald smile flickered across his expression. "Kate always does say that's my worst trait."

He turned to fully look at me for the first time since begining his tale. "You must hate me," he pointed out.

I gave him a sympathetic smile, shaking my head slowly. "Not anymore." I told him, and it was true.

I didn't _hate _him. I proabaly never had.

But _hating _somone and being furious at them were two very different things. Garrett had proven that perfectly today.

He gave a low laugh and shook his head slowly, his chuckls dying down quickly.

"I should apologize," he said and stood, rubbing the fluffed snow off his dark washed dinum jeans.

"You should," I agreed, and then continued. "But there are two things I need to speak to you about first."

Garrett stilled, nervous. He was readying himself for my awaited attack. I held back a smirk.

"About Bella and I's...physical relations before--"

"No." he intruuped, grimancing. "There are some things I would much rather not be aware of."

I chuckled lowly and reached into my pocket, pulling out a small velvet box just big enough tfor the antique inside it. "Fair enough," I told him. "But that wasn't what I meant. I meant that I...I love Bella very much. More than my own life. And as soon as I was sure of this, I knew I wanted to marry her. It was never my intention to treat her like anything other than the angel she is. And I would--very much--like your blessing."

Garrett seemed shocked. I opened the box and swiftly pulled out the ring. I held it up for him to see. His mind was blank with shock that _I_ would ask _his_ blessiing. He assumed I would be hear to kill him...and he wasn't _completely_ off base, I'll admit. "It's lovely," he croaked out when I showed him the ring.

"It was my mother's."

"Ah."

A moment of silnce.

"Garrett? I would very much appreciate your responce." He was pondering, though the thoughts in his mid were not yet fully formed. He was darting around topics, circling what he wanted to say so I wouldn't get a clear view of it.

"What if I say no?" he asked me, his tone blunt.

I quirked an eyebrow, but answered him honestly. "I would be disappointed, and would also spend the rest of my exsistance trying to prove to you how well I would treat her. Love her. Spoil her. But right now, I would turn around and drop down on one knee in front of her and beg her to be my wife, because although I respect you, nothing is worth waiting for Bella."

He smiled then, a real genuine smile.

"Yes. Have my blessing. Besides, when she's thrilled, hopefully I'll be able to worm my way into your finacee's good graces."

And we both laughed at this, smiling brightly.

In time, we might become friends. Not quite yet, of course, but soon.

"Also, theres one other thing I have to do, and I hope you'll understand my reasoning." I apologized beforehand.

The answer was formed first in mhis mind, but before it was out of his mouth, I acted.

My arm had been pulled back and my hand curled into a fist so tight it almsot hurt. I brought my arm forward and in the same second the words began to fly from his mouth, my hand had connected shrply with his jaw. He flew backwards, his back hitting a tree truck twenty feet away. The bark snapped in half in some places, echos bouncing off the far away walls of dense wood. Them with a satisfying slump, he dropped against the white nature floor.

_Son of a bitch! _His mind screeched as the pain began to set in. He gripped his jaw in his hands, his frenzied eyes finding mine.

I smirked broadly at him, nodding as though we had just exchanged simple pleasentries. "You understand?" I asked slowly.

His gaze neve left mine. His eyes were sad and respectful.

_I understand. _He told me. He cocked his head in the direction of the house_. Don't you have somewhere better to be? _

I smiled at him.

I certainly did.


	21. Author's Annocment Sorry!

SEARCHING FOR NEW TWILIGHT BETA

Possible Betas must:

-have previous betaing expirance

-have at least limited knowledge of the Twilight Saga

-be punctual in editing and returning stories/chapters

-have better spelling than I do (although that isn't very difficult)

Would like if Betas:

-contributed personal ideas as well as grammatical changes

-have written own stories before

-had read some (though not nessacarily be a favorite) of my work

-be willing to be honest, even if insulting my work, while betaing

To apply for betaing, please inform me in a PM

Do NOT offer betaa services in a review

--Thanks, Bookworm1027


	22. Chapter 22

**I'm sorry. Lo siento. Je suis désolé. Sono spiacente. Es tut mir leid. If I could show you in sign language, I would. I'mn sooooooo sorry. I know its been forever, and I hope no one 's forgotten about my completely. Yes, I am still writing. No, I am not abandoing this one. My last few months have been two casts, major writer's block, and being out of town for sixty days. I got to a point where it was 'Writing? Do I still know how to do that?'. Well, I hope you enjoy the next installment. (Be warned, I was so eager I attempted to beta on my own. If its too bad, I'll send it over and re-post. Let me know!)**

Chapter 21

The tires squeal murderously against the asphalt, smoke echoing behind us as I slid the car forward three unbearable inches. My hand reached down beside me at once, gripping the shifting handle with a little too much strength-I felt the weak plastic cave in minutely. Immediately after steadying the vehicle, I pressed my foot as carefully and gently as I could to the brake. The car squealed once more before abruptly stopping, sending both me and my unfortunate passenger forward, almost slamming violently into the dashboard.

I took a deep breath, shaking my head as if I could go back to yesterday ago before Edward had _so helpfully suggested _I learn how to do this mundane activity. Frustrated, I turned to gaze out my window, ignoring the slight smell of burnt rubber and cement in the air. The forest next to the road was thicker than most others-vines covering most of the gaps in the trees, moss climbing high on the now green tree trunks, and the ground piled high with dirt. It was enclosed enough to be superb hunting ground, and beautiful enough to appear on the cover of a _Nation Geographic _magazine.

"I'm done," I announced quietly, knowing that he could hear me. My stare did not stray from the dark green landscape beside me. "I tried, Edward. I've been trying for over three hours and I'm absolutely _miserable_ at this." I sighed again, resisting the urge to cross my arms over my chest. I couldn't believe I was having so much trouble learning hot to drive. Even normal _humans_ could do this, and they didn't have the extra reflexes or senses that I did. This was pathetic. How could I think, for just one second-?

Edward's hand reached over to brush delicately to my cheek, his long fingertips trailing softly down my jaw and the column of my neck. Without commanding my body to do so, I relaxed into his satin touch. "Don't be ridiculous, Bella," he crooned softly in my ear. I felt the car shift and he brought his body closer to mine. "You've been doing so well with all of the changes taking place," his lips brush my earlobe seductively. "You don't have to be perfect at everything, love. You're learning-I hate seeing you upset."

_Upset? I was upset?_ I could barely concentrate on the sound of my own breathing when he got this close to me, let alone my emotions. _Where's Jasper when you need 'em? _

I forced my thoughts away from what my mates delightful-if not _sinful_-mouth was doing to my ear as I leaned away from his and responded, "I just wonder…if I can't even manage to do _this _correctly how am supposed to right in with your family?"

Edward didn't answer me for a long moment, not that I My focus was squarely resting on his gentle hand, stroking up and down my arm. With each pass of my limb, he would travel lower, until he was finally touching my hip. My breathing was growing harsh and labored, every nerve I possessed streaming with cutting fire. I resisted both the urges to let my eyes roll back in my head and to look where Edward's hand was gripping me.

Suddenly, without any preamble what-so-ever, Edward's grip tightened on my waist and he was dragging me over the middle consol into his lap, straddling his thighs. I laugh lightly, about to make a joke about his insatiability but the look in his honey shimmering topaz eyes stopped my speech. The unnamable emotions swimming in his beautiful orbs would have halted my heartbeat, if possible.

Edward still made no reply to my question, though I could scarcely remember what it was anymore. His right arm stayed wrapped around my waist pulling us close together. The lack of space between us would have normally sparked a lust-filled frenzy between us, but not now. Because the look my love was gazing upon wasn't filled with erotic tension; he looked at me as though we were about to die, and he would never see me again. As if I were his world, his soul…Edward looked at me as though I were his _everything_.

I could only he could see the same emotions lingering in my almost-golden eyes.

His left hand traveled up to cup my cheek in a sweet, tender gesture. I leaned into his caress, smiling softly.

"Don't you know, my Bella?" he questioned in a troubled tone.

"Know what?" I replied at once, wanting no more than to take the melancholy tone from his voice.

"That you _are _my family." His stare was pleading with me to understand.

I smiled sadly-he didn't understand me at all. I wasn't a part of his coven. I was changed by outside people, and I wasn't adopted like Alice and Jasper. I practically _demanded_ that I join his family. "Maybe in here," I placated Edward, pressing my hand to his still heart. "But not legally-not through blood. If it weren't for you and I…" my voice trailed off suggestively.

I expected Edward to call me silly, or to kiss me, or to do any number of unbearable sweet things to make me feel better. Instead, he did the last thing I except.

"You're right," he said.

I stared, dumbfounded and honestly a little hurt. _Don't be ridiculous,_ I scolded myself. He was just agreeing with me, after all.

_But still…_

Edward continued on, seeming oblivious to my disappointment. "You're not, legally, tied to me. And my Bella," the hand still resting on my cheek moved downwards, wrapping lightly around my neck. "I _want_ to be connected to you, in every way possible."

T to he way he says it-with pleading in his eyes and love in his tone-is actually more spiritual than sexual. Before I can even to try and decipher what he means he arches upwards, moving me to take out a small velvet box. My eyes glued to the box, my unnecessary breathing halting.

_No…he couldn't be…_

Edward softly pulled my neck forward his sweet breathing mingling sensually with mine. "Marry me," he whispered, softly kissing my jaw. "I love you more than anything else. Please. Please marry me."

I looked up into his eyes, so shocked that my jaw popped open slightly.

Marriage? I hadn't even begun to _consider_ matrimony after I was turned, and I can't honestly thinking of it much ass a human. To me, being married to Edward didn't seem like an option. We would, hopefully, be alive longer than any marriage license could survive. It was simply just a piece of paper. What was the point?

But suddenly, staring into my everything's anxious, nervous stare, I understood. Getting married wasn't about a piece of unnecessary paper, or even about the ring I had yet to look down at. Getting married was about-officially, and legally-calling Edward _mine. My husband. _And I was _his_ wife. It was about taking two lives and having them perfectly merged.

Not getting married suddenly seemed like the stupidest thing to do.

"Yes."

Edward was watching my mouth intently as I said this, he seemed utterly confused when I was done. His thick eyebrows pinched together, half of his mouth turning upwards. And then, my always articulate Edwardian-Edward, said the one thing I would have never expected in that moment.

"Huh?"

I laughed, taking his hand off of my neck, and clasping it in both of mine. "I said _yes,_ you fool. I'll marry you right this hour, if you want. Even this minute, this sec-urhg!"

Obviously my fiancé hade better plans for my mouth than speaking, because gripped both sides of my head and almost roughly pulled my face to his, cutting off whatever I had been about to say. His lips were hard against mine, unyielding and uncompromising as he forced his tongue between my willing lips. I moaned as the taste of him filled me as he responded with a growl.

He was the one to break away, though I continued to hold the shirt of his collar tight in my grasp. "Soon, " he panted out through unnecessary breaths. "Very soon, you're going to marry me."

"The sooner the better," I agreed, unable to stop the ridiculous grin from spreading over my face.

He claimed my mouth once more, this time letting his skillful hands travel my landscape, tracing the line of my shoulders and down to my hips, continuing on until I was squirming with anticipation. He was _so close_ and yet not anywhere near where I needed him.

Breaking through the heavy heated atmosphere between us, a high pitched repetitive beeping sounded from Edward's left jacket pocket. I groaned, pulling at his shoulders to remind him that we are not even close to finished here. "Ignore it," I breath against his jaw, licking a path downwards, savoring his sweet flavor on my tongue.

"With pleasure," he replied, and I smiled in satisfaction to hear his voice cracked and strained. I hummed into him, watching with enjoyment as his strong jaw clenched.

Not a minute later, the phone rang again.

Quickly, and with an air of obvious irritation, Edward pulled out the device, refusing to jostle my position at all. I chose to ignore the phone in his hand, still kissing, licking, and sucking at his throat.

"What?" Edward barked into the phone at once, not bothering with pleasantries. Stifling a giggle, I nipped at his empty jugular. "Stop that," Edward directed at me. Laughing harder, I shook my head and continued forward.

"Edward, man-" startled bass rang though the car.

Edward cut him off at once. "Listen, Emmett, we can talk later _alright_." His tone left little room for argument.

"Al-"

"I'm a little _preoccupied_ Emme-"Emmett's

"_Alice is gone!"_

Silence erupted in the once steamed car.

Edward found his voice before I.

"What?"

"Alice, she's-"

"No, I heard you Emmett," Edward interrupted again, his voice immediately changing from harsh and annoyed to calculating and concerned. "But how can she be gone? Are you sure she and Jasper aren't just going off on a longer hunting =trip than usual."

"No, Edward," Emmett's voice is lacking in the normal teasing tone it usually posses, and the result is that he sounds unnervingly menacing. "She didn't _leave_, Edward, she's been _taken. _There was a note."

Edward's eyes grow incredulously large, and I can't help but release small sob. _Oh, God, Alice…_

"We're on our way home," is all he says before he cuts the line off and smoothly maneuvers us so I am sitting in the passenger's seat and he is driving. He turns the keys once, and immediately spins into a blinding fast u-turn. Edward who is, of course, much more expert of a driver than I, takes full advantage of the Vanquish's speed and we pass by the forest rapidly.

My mind was spinning. Who could just…take Alice? Besides the fact that physically kidnapping an immortal was almost impossible with our strength and speed, this was _Alice_. Wouldn't she have seen them coming for her, both in real life and in her own vision centered reality?

And who would want to hurt Alice? If it were I missing it would be obvious, but James wouldn't…

James. He was always one for revenge. But would he really take Alice for my actions? Where was the connection for his rage?

I immediately thought back to James's first, and only, interactions with the Cullen's…

_James turned his head Alice's direction and narrowed his eyes at her, focusing carefully on the sprite sized woman. He chuckled lowly under his breath, the sound coming out as sarcastic and menacing. "You're a spirited one, aren't you?" he teased the small woman._

And then, to Carlisle, he said,…

_"You are declaring war, you realize…By taking what is mine?"_

War. This was a fight to James. A challenge.

This was my fault. James was doing this because I had insulted him. Because I had left his coven.

I had caused Alice's disappearance, and God knew what else. How were Carlisle and Esme dealing with this? And Edward? She was his favorite sister-his best friend. And Jasper…Oh, What had I done to _Jasper_? He lived and breathed for Alice. How was he coping? Was he even still with the family?

Was he even still alive? I wasn't sure if I could remain so, if something happened to my Edward…

The Cullen's large Alaskan house pulled into view. It was dark inside, not that it made any difference. The darkness, to me, meant sadness. Pain.

Empty.

Alice had always seemed to be such a bright force of nature; the sun of the Cullen family. How were they going to live without her? In a world of darkness? That seemed wrong; people as good as the Cullens deserved brightness.

Edward was out of the car before my hand reached the handle. As he reached for my hand, I took a moment to look at his beautifully anguished expression on his face. Without words, I slipped my arms around his waist, burrowing my head into his chest.

"I'm so sorry," my hold on him said. "Everything will be fine."

"I love you," said the way his fingers stroked through my hair.

We entered through the door a moment later and we were instantly enfolded in a pair of slim, tender arms which squeeze us tightly. I can feel Esme's body quiver with dry sobs. Edward, closing his eyes, briefly squeezes her back before leaving both of us, rushing to Carlisle's side.

Still embraced by Esme, my sight blocked in her cameral locks, I listen carefully for their one sided conversation.

"Did you ask Alexander?" Edward question, his voice strained. Their was a pause, and then he sighed loudly. "Where is Emmett and-Alright, but I'm staying-yes, of course."

Giving Esme one last loving squeeze, I moved out of her hold and walked over to an usually distraught looking Carlisle, placing a gentle hand on Edward's shoulder.

"What happened?" I asked, directing the question to both men. "Where's the note-let me see it."

Carlisle shifted his piercing golden stare to me. "Alice," he swallowed thickly, "She was with the rest of us, at the Denali's house. She…we think she saw something. We questioned her about it, of course, but she wouldn't answer anything. Not even to Jasper. She paced for a few moments and then screamed at us, told us she was going to the house alone. She told us, and especially Jasper, to stay there.

"That barely lasted fifteen minutes, and then Jasper, Esme, and I were back here and…she wasn't."

Esme choked out another heartbreaking sob, moving to lean against her husband's side.

"We did…we found…this."

Carlisle's hand was unnaturally still as he held out a torn piece of notebook paper out for me to take. I stared at it as though it were a venomous snake. This note…James left it here. _James. _

Edward's arm slide effortlessly down my back, wrapping around my waist. His lips traced against my ear, his tone pleading and desperate. "We need you to read it, Bella. You know James best, and if some sort of clue…"words trailed off as he placed gentle pressure against my hand, urging it towards the letter.

I nodded. I would do it for Edward, and for Alice.

I could still smell the ink as I pulled open the letter, and I instantly recognized the scrawling, fast paced handwriting. _Isabella, _it began.

_I warned you and the odd ones of my coming back here. I demand respect, you must remember. My intention in coming here was to kill reach my own hand through the leader's chest-a punishment for his theft. But, as it suddenly occurs, I am finding no need for such actions any longer. I had thought that I recognized dear, sweet little Alice. As so I did! She's agreed to travel with me as trade-they obtained you, and I her. If any time you wish to exchange, perhaps you should join my in Dr. Theesebain's office? It is, after all, where it all began. _

_All my best regards, _

_James. _

Then, slipping into my fingers and falling from the folded note was a small square of paper. A postcard.

A Mississippi State postcard.


	23. Author's Annocment 2

**Author's Annocment! **

I am in need of :

-Good writters who have written at least three stories

-Somone who is willing to put in hard work

-Someone with vast knowledge of Fanfiction (preferablly not limited to Twilight)

-Somwhat who can read long stories quickly and throughly

I am starting up a unique oppritunity that enables readers, and writters, to post their thoughts and make comments that will be wide spread. It will help sharpen writting skills, and possibly promote stores.

Please PM if intrested!


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